If you met a woman you really liked, but who needed to lose weight would you... (69)
AngelBeth76: You know I thought I would get all criticism. I was almost afraid to post, but my curiosity got the better of me. Everyone has been great! Thanks a lot!!!
no worries. the forums could get crazy but stick around and you'll have fun. We're all for the common good... finding a partner 
AngelBeth76: You know I thought I would get all criticism. I was almost afraid to post, but my curiosity got the better of me. Everyone has been great! Thanks a lot!!!
Actualy the criticism is a good way of telling alot about how well you would get along with a person. If they say nasty and ugly things, then you know who not to associate with.
I'm a tailor. I recommend you get yourself some good frock advice - wear clothes that emphasize the bits of you that look good and skim over the bits that your not so confident about.
I'm guessing that you should show off you bust and butt, ruching and belts can minimise your waist. Stop thinking of yourself as overweight and go strut your hour-glass self.
I've noticed that women who carry a bit of weight very often have good legs, as well.
Jac xxx
I'm guessing that you should show off you bust and butt, ruching and belts can minimise your waist. Stop thinking of yourself as overweight and go strut your hour-glass self.
I've noticed that women who carry a bit of weight very often have good legs, as well.
Jac xxx
Some men i know say the only fat bird they like is one that goes in the oven at christmas but i dont know iff there rite saying thing like that 
lostx2: Actualy the criticism is a good way of telling alot about how well you would get along with a person. If they say nasty and ugly things, then you know who not to associate with.
true.
Who gives a crap, big girls have big hearts... image is superficial ... keep her the way he is
jahzah: Who gives a crap, big girls have big hearts... image is superficial ... keep her the way he is
AngelBeth76: I want to lose weight. I have lost 25 lbs so far. I gained weight over a period of an abusive marriage, 2 kids, and a lot of sickness. I'm getting better and trying my best though. I also want to get out there and date as well. I am nervous about dating while still overweight though. Do I wait until I lose a bunch of weight to get out there or do I start now. Tell me what you think!
its tricky but basically if you are overweight and dating you need to be comfortable where you are and so does the guy. i am overweight not comfortable with it but not dating lol. be friends with people go out have fun and dont tie your weight issues into a relationship. they are either going to like who you are now or hit the road and some of them will meet you and hit the road lol because of weight. be cool with who you are.
AngelBeth76: I want to lose weight. I have lost 25 lbs so far. I gained weight over a period of an abusive marriage, 2 kids, and a lot of sickness. I'm getting better and trying my best though. I also want to get out there and date as well. I am nervous about dating while still overweight though. Do I wait until I lose a bunch of weight to get out there or do I start now. Tell me what you think!
its tricky but basically if you are overweight and dating you need to be comfortable where you are and so does the guy. i am overweight not comfortable with it but not dating lol. be friends with people go out have fun and dont tie your weight issues into a relationship. they are either going to like who you are now or hit the road and some of them will meet you and hit the road lol because of weight. be cool with who you are.
I want to lose weight. I have lost 25 lbs so far. I gained weight over a period of an abusive marriage, 2 kids, and a lot of sickness. I'm getting better and trying my best though. I also want to get out there and date as well. I am nervous about dating while still overweight though. Do I wait until I lose a bunch of weight to get out there or do I start now. Tell me what you think
if they are not going to like you for who your are no matter what your size etc then they are not worth your time plain and simple.
gemeh22: if they are not going to like you for who your are no matter what your size etc then they are not worth your time plain and simple.
well said lostx2: Unfortunately you are right in that obervation. Most people do go by looks. However, some of us do not judge by looks alone. I admit there has to be some kind of physical attraction there to start the spark, but for some of us the true outer beauty is by the way they carry themselves.
you're too good to be true, how's your hunt going?
AngelBeth76: I want to lose weight. I have lost 25 lbs so far. I gained weight over a period of an abusive marriage, 2 kids, and a lot of sickness. I'm getting better and trying my best though. I also want to get out there and date as well. I am nervous about dating while still overweight though. Do I wait until I lose a bunch of weight to get out there or do I start now. Tell me what you think!
I think it's wonderful that you have the inspiration and courage to begin again. If you haven't already done so, it might be a thought to ensure that you've processed the abusive marriage completely so that the chance of it occuring again is zero
The other ladies have said it perfectly.
The best part of you is inside
plainlyjune: you're too good to be true, how's your hunt going?
I'm still spending my nights alone, but I will never give up hope.
How you been June? Been busy for me lately. Was trying to get in as much time as I could with my aunt before she goes back home.
lostx2: I'm still spending my nights alone, but I will never give up hope.How you been June? Been busy for me lately. Was trying to get in as much time as I could with my aunt before she goes back home.
totally agree with the spending quality time part. saw mom off at the airport yesterday myself. i should get used to it, but i never got over separation anxiety. Costapacket: lock her in a box for six months and feed her 3 grapes a day....
cruel to be kind...........
lolcruel to be kind...........
AngelBeth76: I want to lose weight. I have lost 25 lbs so far. I gained weight over a period of an abusive marriage, 2 kids, and a lot of sickness. I'm getting better and trying my best though. I also want to get out there and date as well. I am nervous about dating while still overweight though. Do I wait until I lose a bunch of weight to get out there or do I start now. Tell me what you think!
If someone wants you only for your size, don't date them.
It's good that you are doing something about it; your kids deserve a healthy mom; good for you!!
AngelBeth76: I want to lose weight. I have lost 25 lbs so far. I gained weight over a period of an abusive marriage, 2 kids, and a lot of sickness. I'm getting better and trying my best though. I also want to get out there and date as well. I am nervous about dating while still overweight though. Do I wait until I lose a bunch of weight to get out there or do I start now. Tell me what you think!
If someone wants you only for your size, don't date them.
It's good that you are doing something about it; your kids deserve a healthy mom; good for you!!
Let's presume, just for the sake of clarity in my answer, that-
1) When you say 'really liked' you mean, 'are pretty much crazy for'
2) When you say 'needs to loose weight', you're saying 'she's obese'
I would definitely spend time/go out with her, but at the same time she would definitely have to work on it. I would encourage her, and I would very much do whatever it was she needed along with her- Exercise, healthy eating, you name it.
And while many people are happy to say 'looks aren't important', the fact of the matter, even if that's the case, is that there are a lot of serious health concerns with obesity to worry about, aside from all the social pitfalls.
Yes, I believe people have their own intrinsic worth, but saying that 'superficial' things aren't at all important in any way is a bit off base in my opinion.
What if that person, instead of needing to lose weight, didn't take showers? What if they wreaked of body odor, all of the time? Would all the 'inside is what counts' people feel that same way? Would you feel as comfortable or less being with that person in public?
1) When you say 'really liked' you mean, 'are pretty much crazy for'
2) When you say 'needs to loose weight', you're saying 'she's obese'
I would definitely spend time/go out with her, but at the same time she would definitely have to work on it. I would encourage her, and I would very much do whatever it was she needed along with her- Exercise, healthy eating, you name it.
And while many people are happy to say 'looks aren't important', the fact of the matter, even if that's the case, is that there are a lot of serious health concerns with obesity to worry about, aside from all the social pitfalls.
Yes, I believe people have their own intrinsic worth, but saying that 'superficial' things aren't at all important in any way is a bit off base in my opinion.
What if that person, instead of needing to lose weight, didn't take showers? What if they wreaked of body odor, all of the time? Would all the 'inside is what counts' people feel that same way? Would you feel as comfortable or less being with that person in public?
lostx2: Unfortunately you are right in that obervation. Most people do go by looks. However, some of us do not judge by looks alone. I admit there has to be some kind of physical attraction there to start the spark, but for some of us the true outer beauty is by the way they carry themselves.
I think that this is rubbish... I've dated girl in wheelchairs and girls others would view as overweight, blind or handicappped but all I see is the person..
Physical attraction? How they carry themselves... ? Man you're way off the mark..
Some of you go for looks but you ned to go for the soul...age or physical problems are not an issue for me...
If you can't see past that you're going to miss some wonderful people...
Looks will fade but the soul last for ever...
Music_Is_Life: I think that this is rubbish... I've dated girl in wheelchairs and girls others would view as overweight, blind or handicappped but all I see is the person..
Physical attraction? How they carry themselves... ? Man you're way off the mark..
Some of you go for looks but you ned to go for the soul...age or physical problems are not an issue for me...
If you can't see past that you're going to miss some wonderful people...
Looks will fade but the soul last for ever...
Physical attraction? How they carry themselves... ? Man you're way off the mark..
Some of you go for looks but you ned to go for the soul...age or physical problems are not an issue for me...
If you can't see past that you're going to miss some wonderful people...
Looks will fade but the soul last for ever...
While I appreciate your view, shame on you for telling someone what they should or shouldn't want in a partner.
Do you like art? Do you like music? Do you like dance?
Can't the way something looks, or the way something sounds, or moves affect you powerfully?
I hope so. I really do, or for all the 'worth' your soul has, it's as dead as a stump.
I think the way a woman carries herself can be incredibly moving- Depending on the woman, of course. Yes, the way she moves; Yes, the way she talks; Yes, the sound of her voice, and all of the other noises she makes.
Doesn't it stand to reason that you can fall in love with a lot of people in your life, and a lot of those people can be just be incredibly good friends, but that maybe you would have certain criteria for the person you're wanting to spend the rest of your life with?
I have very strong feelings for some close personal friends- But that's exactly what they are. Close, personal friends. Basically, I love these people, but I am not their lover (not all of them at least!
).Point is, you don't have to miss out on a 'wonderful people', just because you're not in a relationship with them.
Barrellofart: While I appreciate your view, shame on you for telling someone what they should or shouldn't want in a partner.
Do you like art? Do you like music? Do you like dance?
Can't the way something looks, or the way something sounds, or moves affect you powerfully?
I hope so. I really do, or for all the 'worth' your soul has, it's as dead as a stump.
I think the way a woman carries herself can be incredibly moving- Depending on the woman, of course. Yes, the way she moves; Yes, the way she talks; Yes, the sound of her voice, and all of the other noises she makes.
Doesn't it stand to reason that you can fall in love with a lot of people in your life, and a lot of those people can be just be incredibly good friends, but that maybe you would have certain criteria for the person you're wanting to spend the rest of your life with?
I have very strong feelings for some close personal friends- But that's exactly what they are. Close, personal friends. Basically, I love these people, but I am not their lover (not all of them at least! ).
Point is, you don't have to miss out on a 'wonderful people', just because you're not in a relationship with them.
Do you like art? Do you like music? Do you like dance?
Can't the way something looks, or the way something sounds, or moves affect you powerfully?
I hope so. I really do, or for all the 'worth' your soul has, it's as dead as a stump.
I think the way a woman carries herself can be incredibly moving- Depending on the woman, of course. Yes, the way she moves; Yes, the way she talks; Yes, the sound of her voice, and all of the other noises she makes.
Doesn't it stand to reason that you can fall in love with a lot of people in your life, and a lot of those people can be just be incredibly good friends, but that maybe you would have certain criteria for the person you're wanting to spend the rest of your life with?
I have very strong feelings for some close personal friends- But that's exactly what they are. Close, personal friends. Basically, I love these people, but I am not their lover (not all of them at least! ).
Point is, you don't have to miss out on a 'wonderful people', just because you're not in a relationship with them.
Thank you so much for explaining what I ment. I have trouble putting into words my exact thoughts at times. You however hit it straight on the nose. 
Be kind to yourself and accept the beauty you have right now, and men will have to notice that. You probably already know that you can't get to a desired weight without moving your body..
Find what you love to do, and stick with it. That whole work out 3 times a week is crap...They changed it to 5..I just up to an hour to 90 mins a day, 7 days a week. You will feel better that way. I found yoga and walking are wonderful..I throw in some variety with a bollywood dance workout too. Also, don't pin yourself down to a have to time of day. Vary that time of day to fit your schedule, the kids, the weather, etc...Keep it free and fun
...I had a physical situation that caused me to gain a few years ago...Don't beat yourself up over things you can't control. But, be happy and enjoy living a healthy lifestyle, and things will begin to fall into place. Just have fun with being healthy, and the right man will see who you really are..God bless ya!
Find what you love to do, and stick with it. That whole work out 3 times a week is crap...They changed it to 5..I just up to an hour to 90 mins a day, 7 days a week. You will feel better that way. I found yoga and walking are wonderful..I throw in some variety with a bollywood dance workout too. Also, don't pin yourself down to a have to time of day. Vary that time of day to fit your schedule, the kids, the weather, etc...Keep it free and fun ...I had a physical situation that caused me to gain a few years ago...Don't beat yourself up over things you can't control. But, be happy and enjoy living a healthy lifestyle, and things will begin to fall into place. Just have fun with being healthy, and the right man will see who you really are..God bless ya! Well done, keeep up the good work, but remember, beauty comes from within and any nice person does not dwell on the superficial - best of lucklostx2: Unfortunately you are right in that obervation. Most people do go by looks. However, some of us do not judge by looks alone. I admit there has to be some kind of physical attraction there to start the spark, but for some of us the true outer beauty is by the way they carry themselves.
Nice to know there are a few good guys still out there.
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You will find it is better than a series of rejections, with pithy excuses, which lower your self esteem even further.
Often, too, you would "settle" for a man who wants you despite yourself, rather than a man you would really like to go after, because you like him, and haven't the confidence.
There are those who actually like women who are large, but then you will never lose the weight you intend to, if you go out with one of them. They, are often co-dependent people, feeding your bad habits to feed theirs.
I know not everyone will agree with this, but that is ok. They can advise you in their own way.
Speaking from experience...I agree with Ginger. The more weight I lose the more heads i turn and the more doors open. Not saying you can't find someone while you're overweight but more than likely he won't be a keeper as they say