elegantlady Forum Posts (104)
Most of the time the children are 5 years of age and under, someone should be watching them and why is that parents don't even hold the hand of their child while crossing the street! In a hotel situation, what if a fire broke out, what if the child became ill, there is always a chance something could happen in the absence of a parent, so why take the chance? Last week a local child drowned at an amusement park in one of the water type activity rides. Nobody noticed the little boy age 4 slip under the water, the pool was crowded, it had a wave that gushed out water every few minutes and even though there were several lifeguards in attendance, it was difficult to monitor a pool this size in addition to being so crowded. The mother was seated outside the pool and sent her daughter who is I believe about 10 years of age to look for her brother. Why wasn't the mother watching her 4 year old? Why wasn't the child wearing a protective vest, questions I'm certain are now after the tragic loss being addressed? The bottom line is as a parent you need to be aware of where your young children are at all times for their safety and also to prevent the predators that are always ready to take advantage of circumstances when you are so obviously distracted. Let's keep our children safe, pay attention to where your children are and please don't leave them unattended!
Gives the rest of us hope!
The bottom line is, everyone can not be thin! I am so fed up with people judging a person by their size, do you really think that everyone who is large stuffs themselves? On the opposite side of the coin there are people who are really thin who try everything under the sun to gain weight and can't! There is no doubt that we all have specifics that we find attractive, however I feel there is no reason why such derogatory remarks are necessary just because you don't find someone attractive!
But now I believe I was just turned on, a simple case of infatuation, nowadays it takes more than looks I think. You can be attracted to a person but after getting to know them find out that they are nothing like what you thought they would be! Love takes time!
It provides a cloak of safety especially for women, however, you have to be cautious here as well. There are predators on the web who are just waiting to take advantage of some people, especially those who are in a vulnerable state. I'm not saying you are, but having been through the experiences you have, of course you would want to establish a genuine friendship with someone. But the web can be unkind at times because people tend to not be who they say they are. So as one other cs member cautioned I also encourage you to not give out personal information, just enjoy interracting with men who appear to be sincere. Pen pal relationships can develop into something more, just take your time and have fun! Good luck to you!
Because of all that I had been through as a child and in my early adulthood, I chose a profession where I could turn the negatives in my life into positives, by helping people and reaching out to others who have suffered, etc. If you meet someone who genuinely cares about you, they will be accepting of your treatment and will stand by you while you get better. One final word, if your depression is such that it involves wanting to take out your frustrations upon another person, what I mean is if you are someone who acts out by physically abusing someone, then I think it's best to wait until your condition improves before engaging in a relationship. If that is not the case, with medication, counselling and support from loved ones, being in a relationship should prove beneficial to you. Good luck to you!!
Over the years I have made a special connection to many people, some the time spent together was limited but unforgettable. I have loved many and will love many more, but there is a special bond that exists between true soulmates.
I don't know what the circumstances are that caused your mother to drink and drive that day, but depression is and has to be recognised as an illness. Whereas your Mother can not change what has happened in the past, I believe she is making an effort to try and have a relationship with you. The bond between Mother and child is very strong even when if you have spent many years apart. Of course you have mixed emotions, there is definately a feeling of abandonment on both parts. Your Mother feels guilty for abandoning you as well. I think you need to handle one issue at a time, if it is important to you to establish a relationship with your Mother, work on that. Don't have great expectations, just take one day at a time, do simple things, maybe even limit time together. And most importantly talk to someone about how you are feeling, maybe there is a support group of children who grew up without parents. You mentioned something about your Father "bringing" your ex around? Not knowing the situation JMO, but I really feel like your Father should let you handle your own love life. In regard to how you are feeling, crying and emotionally distraught, I think that's normal, it is much better to let those feelings out then to try and repress them. Again, seek professional help from a professional therapist or someone you can confide in who's opinion you value. They say time is a healer of all hearts that break, I know this is true, you just have to give it time. Also, you have to be willing to forgive your Mother, that in itself is part of the healing process. I do wish you well and hopefully you and your Mother will be able to have a healthy and happy relationship in the future. Take care!
The marriage lasted over 24 years!
Would I do it again? You bet and I would love to live in the UK or any Scandanavian country, but will still keep my home here in the states just in case things don't work out!
I don't know why my profile reads that I am from London, I am not, I am American! It saddens me that men and women are losing their lives on a daily basis fighting a war that will most likely go on whether or not we remain present and active participants. The reason why I say there is a reason for the madness is that most people don't realise that Iraq was once one of our allies. The problem as I see it at least one of the problems is that we the US/Britain have supplied aid to these countries by way of training their military, given them weapons, planes, etc. Secondly, you can not go into a country that has become completely out of control and expect to go in there and make changes immediately. I am by no means no expert in the field of warfare but I really believe that if you are going to make any changes you can't wait until things become chaotic. The US and Britain have always been generous in offering support and aid to war torn countries, yet our own countries are suffering! When we offered aid to Saudia Arabia, one of the richest countries in the world, did they pay us back? No!!! Why not? They have the money to do so! We imposed sanctions on Cuba and when Hurricane Katrina occurred, who offered us aid?...Fidel Castro!! Of course we declined his offer, stupid on our part, don't you think? It is time to lift the sanctions against Cuba so that people will stop trying to escape their country because they are hungry and don't have decent livng conditions. I've gone off on the original theme here, I guess what I'm really trying to say is, there are many reasons why the world is in the condition it is today. We can't blame Bush, we can't blame Britain's Prime Minister, we can't blame Bill Clinton, etc. What has happened to our world is we have sat by and let the Holocaust happen, we turned our heads at the conditions in the Sudan, Bosnia, etc., we imposed sanctions against Cuba and now our shelters are filled with escapees, we sent our men and women off to fight a war with the declaration that there were weapons of mass destruction that have yet to be found, etc. And the sad thing is, every day another soldier's body arrives home for a distraught family to bury, hidden from the news unless it is local, how sad indeed!!
But I think we have to define what is "real" and what is fantasy. If you view yourself as "brokenhearted" when you have not even met and spent time together, you are jumping to conclusions! If the person you are not in love with does not share your feelings, you have to accept that. I don't believe distance should be a factor when it comes to love, depending on your job skills or educational background, you can always relocate. The problem with web relationships is that we tend to fall in love with words. It is much to easy to read things that are supposedly from the heart, they make us feel wonderful !! But the reality is, we have to really get to know another person, feel that chemistry in real life, etc. But I wish you well, don't give up on real love in real life!! You are a beautiful young lady and I am certain many opportunities await you to find someone appreciative of what you have to offer!
I will try to remember this when I am frustrated when blow drying or flat ironing my hair! Although lately I'm inclined to say "whatever" and throw a hat on my head!
This is a list of forum posts created by elegantlady.
How important is kissing? A question for women under 30
I have a question for the younger people here, in particular women under 30. Suppose you met a very attractive man, you started dating and found him fun to be with. He was intelligent, sensitive, kind, great sense of humour, etc. Clearly he had all the qualities you were seeking and after several dates you shared your first kiss. However, that first kiss didn't do it for you. My question is, would that be a deal breaker for you? I'm asking because I know someone who had been dating a girl for about a month and they had that kiss which was great for both of them. But she told him, "It's a good thing you are a good kisser because if you weren't, that would be it". He was quite surprised, but she said that she and her other female friends all feel the same, if you are not a good kisser, you're done. My thoughts are when you are in a new relationship it is a new experience for both of you. I think you have to become acquainted as to what feels good for you both or rather let each other know what you like. I can't imagine dropping a guy just because he is a bad kisser. But what do I know, I'm just a little old lady who lived through the 60's which was the age of free love, so anything went. Of course if someone is licking your whole face, sticking his tongue halfway down your throat, you need to give him some lessons! But I'd be interested in hearing from women of any age about how you feel about this? Would you drop someone who had everything you want just because that first kiss was not good? Doesn't practice make perfect?