I think you might ask these friends, if perhaps talking and crying over the same issue is not helping them. Ask if there is anything else that has helped them deal better in the past. This will draw attention to their behaviour. If it continues, then perhaps you need some time out or other company for a while, when we have little emotional reserve, we don't want to spend it rerunning the same sympathy that does not seem to even help. Your reaction is understandable, but maybe also look to why lately you are finding it more wearisome.
Wish there was presure to stop, I quit this time last year after trying to quit for 7 years! There was more pressure to smoke than quit, but then most people still smoke in Cyprus, the smoking ban in restaurants/pubs has been almost completely abandoned, meaning that I passive smoke if I go out which keeps cravings alive, I also get migrains when I passive smoke now, which puts me off going out. I would prefer it if smokers were alienated, I think it would mean less smokers, and better health in general.
In all honesty, the wheelchair in itself is not a deal breaker, but the person would have to have something about them that I am looking for, for me to allow the possibility. I don't mean material wealth, although that might do it for some people.
It's always a ballance, in every case, never mind the wheelchair..the person has this detriment, but this positive personality, that I really want to be around, and add to my life.
Stop worrying about the wheel chair, and think about what positive traits/possibilities you could work on bringing to the table.
I think you would like to.. and it's a sweet idea that should be followed, but perhaps one rose would be enough of a gesture without seeming "desperate" or any other complication.
Do not add any man or woman any of my friends are dating.
I knew a woman who used to add ex/current boyfriends of all her friends, and then flirt with them to wind up her friends. I have seen first hand how easy it is to upset and hurt people, even accidentaly. So although my rule is extreme, I see it as a kindness and a respect of my friends relationships.
The facebook ethics you ask about, will vary with different age groups I imagine, particularly amongst prodominantly single groups. It does feel horrible to be misunderstood when you have good intentions, I hope you can clear up the misunderstanding and salvage your relationship with your niece.
I think it's a numbers game, the more women you meet and get to know, in real life or on dating site forums/email the more chance you will find someone just right for you.. so by cuting vast numbers of women due to astrology would mean you would meet fewer women and lessen your chances to meet the right one. I do understand you feel that the ones you do approach are likely to be 'right' for you, however I personaly don't believe that some sign/astrology can find your perfect woman. A person could be perfect for you now at this stage because life/circumstances has changed you both and made you fit,but 10 years earlier you wouldn't have fit. Maybe we all have to find our mate at a time when we are vulnerable, willing to take a risk and lonely enough to try hard. Maybe we have to have been in other relationships,and learned the lessons needed to make this one work. Who knows how many complicated elements come into play, that are beyond comprehension..
Men think that women should be able to read their minds and 'know' what is wrong. Men think a point will come when they no longer have to 'work' at the relationship. Women contort themselves unrecognisably to be/do what is needed, and in the process, lose their equalibrium/stability, making them hard to live with and less attractive. The most common one I see for both men and women these days is a lack of willingness to compromise/sacrifice.
I think when a women walks away, men feel pain because their ego has been bruised, and because they feel pain, they think getting back together is the solution.
I believe to a certain extent happiness/positivity and sadness/negativity can become more ingrained because neural pathways,once regularly forged,are much easier paths to fall back into. So if someone has a rough time of it,and doesn't find a way to positive/happy feelings for a long time after,it becomes much much harder,to turn things around.
Allen Carr wrote a helpful way of looking at smoking.
I have tried a few products,gum,patch's etc but I found cutting down to a very light cigerette-silkcut silver,then cutting down to 4 a day then quiting cold turkey at a time when stress was least worked best for me.Loads of relaxation of any sort the first few weeks-massage would probably help also.
All the nicotine products continue to feed the addiction,seems senseless to me.
Allen Carr wrote a helpful way of looking at smoking.
I have tried a few products,gum,patch's etc but I found cutting down to a very light cigerette-silkcut silver,then cutting down to 4 a day then quiting cold turkey at a time when stress was least worked best for me.Loads of relaxation of any sort the first few weeks-massage would probably help also.
All the nicotine products continue to feed the addiction,seems senseless to me.
I quit many many times,each time I learned something.
In the end I was successful only because I quit drinking,and sugar at the same time.A mix of evening out blood sugar,keeping my resolve by staying sober,and relaxing with the help of hypnotherapy from utube.
Also accountability is a strong factor,I promised my kids I would take on a chore I hate,and give them money if I started smoking again this time.
I also took on some gym training and nutrition courses to give myself something constructive to focus on,that I wanted to be healthy for.
This combination has finaly kept me constant on the promise I made to my self.
Nice people are nice people on or off the net. I try not to force my idea of 'real'friendship on anyone. If the give and take,subtle or in my face feels good to me,I keep the friendship.
I would,but I heard they had one in Cyprus,50 women turned up and only 3 men,we also used to arrange regular meet ups from here,but ended up with all single women..
I have in the past,when a man 20 years my senior-(about 60),told me age is just a number and I should have an open mind and meet up,suggested that the women on here around 80 would be very happy that they feel that way,and wished them good luck. These men often become suddenly less open minded,I'm not sure why..
lol they are just pushing their luck in hope of scoring,that is all,younger women equal fresher healthier more prestigious mate for them,I know where you are coming from and I find it equaly annoying when someone 10 years my senior thinks they are a good match for me,it is a little insulting..particularly when they look and remind me of my Father..
Long distance dating if you are free to relocate can work,specialy if you are not finding anyone local you can relate to,personaly I don't reply as I am not free to relocate,and find men in my area to talk to easy enough not to bother.
tomboygirl2 Forum Posts (39)
I'm with her lol,but I don't think gay's are particularly into astrology..
I'm catatonic!
RE: How do you select your friends and how do they choose you?
I think you might ask these friends, if perhaps talking and crying over the same issue is not helping them. Ask if there is anything else that has helped them deal better in the past.This will draw attention to their behaviour. If it continues, then perhaps you need some time out or other company for a while, when we have little emotional reserve, we don't want to spend it rerunning the same sympathy that does not seem to even help. Your reaction is understandable, but maybe also look to why lately you are finding it more wearisome.