With advancing years, for some reason, I have started to look more at the bigger picture,probably in part due to the fact that failing eyesight precludes me from see-ing the finer detail. I,ve also noticed that I tend to see more with my mind than I do with my eyes. Anyway,in such a mood.............
Ladies and gentlemen,friends and lovers(huh!) something of great importance has recently occured to me,just today in fact. It is something which I suspect a great many of you knew already and it is the fact that we appear to have amongst us a man of true Greatness.
No, amazingly learned and highly respected as he is, not to mention well loved, it is not Professor Conrad. And as worldly wise as he is it is not Mister U.R.Rust of Rottingham.Nor indeed is is simple Mister Elley,master of wetsuit and ladies lingerie combinations. And as hilarious as he is, tis not Jacko,nor our Antipodean muse Cuspo.
I am of course talking about non other than that man amongst men,Manolito. For here is a man who has taken the time and trouble to establish the exact longtitude and latitude of his own little willy and come up with the incredible discovery that at one time his wiennie,as he so fondly calls it, was at the exact epicentre of the entire universe.
This man,ladies and gentlemen,is a true genious.Selflessly pursuing that holy grail of all mankind; where does my little winkie fit into all this,the moon the stars,where is it in the great order of all material things,terrestial and interrestial.
I presume he was able to divine a direct line direct from his little willy all the way to the outer reaches of space.
A discovery such as this will surely go down in history. People will talk in hushed,respectful tones of Socrates,Euripides (who ripped these?) Dragonfly makes the teas and Maolito.
In future years when this poly-math amongst us finally achieves the Greatness he so deserves and which will surely come,we at Cs will remember not only how he used to smoke Woodbines, but also how he stabbed himself in the groin through a map of the world with a compass in the quest for human understanding.
Also,what this now means is that NASA can use Mano,s little wiennie as a tracking device for those spacecraft which have been sent to the farthest reaches of our universe.
Of course,we all at CS must do everything we can to protect Mano,s winkie and I,m afraid you ladies have to maintain it,s prisitine condition.
I am personally prepared to give up my wetsuit and donate it as a protective shield. Rusty,we need you codpiece. I know you think that this will leave your eggplant vulnerable to female attack,but I really don,t think there,s any danger there. A man must do.....
One small willy for Mano, one giant leap for Mankind. Sir Mano,I salute you and your wiennie.
PS All that is now left for us to establish is where on the pyramid is Mano,s willy?.
Ok girls listen up. I actually do not think that this is Rusty,he,s just too,too,nice. It,s got to be an imposter,somebody who has hijacked his profile,barstard. Tell you what though,why don,t we just keep mum and hope that this imposter stays thinking we are all dumb enough to fall for his cunning little trick and as for the old Rustyrot,weeeellllll,probably had a dram too much of that Cisk stuff and may even forget who he is for a long time to come.
Alternatively,Rusty,s boat has just come in with a heap of sheckles.
Ah,yes,err...well I think I came in looking for Mano,then I got a job as a taxi driver and came in to collect a fair,and then somehow,gawdknows how it happened,but I kinda turned into a women,kindathing.
Elley Forum Posts (2,808)
Man O, Greatness
Hi Forever,howgoesit?