Call men selfish for being apprehensive about getting involved with a woman with kids, but you have to look at their life situation as well and reallise just how much it impacts on their lives too.
As a young single guy I think the following makes me uneasy about a girl with kids:
You know she's gonna have far less free time especially if her kids are young, you also know their's gonna be a biological father in the background! Then there's the issue of kids not accepting you as the 'new guy' in their mummy's life....
Call it selfish if you like but that's how I fear it is. But in the same breath, if I really liked her and she liked me too, I'm sure I'd learn to accept everything that comes with the package;)
Granted there are "too many men and not enough time" - one could also accurately claim that while perfect men don't exist there are still good men almost everywhere! I'd like to think the same goes for good women! But could you please find me a good woman who's not looking for a perfect man???
Thanks for your advice trulymadlydeeply! Only problem I have with telling a girl that I like her is that being in the 21st century girls here in Ireland have egos as big as any man's could be so I'm kinds weary of massaging them lol!!! I'd prefer it if good old flirting could just take its course and let things develop naturally;)
I agree with you there trulymadlydeeply, I don't expect a girl to burst out with all her intentions in the first message! But what gets to me is if ur on the 20th message or so and I still have to hear about how she got so pissed last night while on the lash that she's (now clearly) looking for sympathy from a guy she has no intention of ever meeting...
Just wandering what constitutes this? I've seen in so many women's profiles that they are not interested in "time wasters"
I've also noticed that an awefull lot of women that email me prefer to talk about their plans for the weekend involving their own friends or doing their own stuff than showing any interest in meeting up or even getting to know me better.
I sort of wander if those who complain about "time wasters" might not be showing a bit of double standards here...
Alright, I knew the issue of pregnancy, childbirth and monthly cycles would surface at some point in this thread! But cast all that asside I'm sure women have it far better than men in the fun department - given the choice I'd be a chick this weekend for sure! I meen, girls get to go out, get free drinks from guys, laugh to themselves after a guy spent half their salary chatting them up and then still gets blown off at the end of the night... Would love to be able to go out and have all that power and freedom for once...
Given the choice immediately (right now), would you prefer going on a shopping spree (using your own money) or making love? Please also state if you are in a relationship and for how long?
Personaly I don't think there is anything wrong with single people - provided it's not as a result of them harming others - either physically or emotionally.
I don't beleive people are single by choice - to say so is a state of denial, Maslow's hierarchy of needs states that love is a basic need third to only food and shelter. No man is an island...
A few interesting and valid points here, thanks! The point about oil companies controling prices to offset demand for alternatives is a scary prospect, while I'm sure they have been doing that for ages, I don't think many of them have the excess capacity to do that anymore - most of them are probably running flat out to meet demand which is why we have seen oil go from $10 to $100 in 10 years!
What scares me is that politicians here in the EU are already using the issue of climate change as a major political marketing ploy! They are taking ever increasing measures to get people to use less energy, these measures usually hit the poor the hardest! While reducing CO2 emissions is a step in the right direction it isn't the answer to the problem. If people are to improve their lifestyles then incresing energy consumption is going to be inevitable! Governments and energy companies should be actively seeking ways to increase clean energy production rather than trying to get people to stop doing what has made the human race what we are today...
This is the big question - the oil price, global warming, Kyoto protocol etc.
For anyone who's interested in where the world is going in the next 10 to 20 years give their views.
We've watched "An Inconvenient Truth", we know the oil situation & we all have our views on nuclear & renewable energy. But where are we really heading? Oil, coal and gas still provide 85% of all the worlds energy, and current trends suggest that won't change much until something forces it to>>>
Nowadays energy is more important to the survival of some 6.5bn people than food and water - because without it most of us would have no access to either!
So what do you people think - will it be political intervention or will we have to wait for economics to force us in the right direction? Or will we just continue to huddle around the coal fire for as long as it continues to burn - no matter what the cost?
Or do most people just turn a blind eye to the situation hoping that some or other scientist somewhere will find a way to run our cars and power stations on water???
1) Simple economics - money has its own gravitational pull -> the more of it you put in one place the more it attracts -> Businesses and investors are more likely to go where the big money is because it's a safer bet.
2) Mass immigration -> countries with a high influx of foriegn workers always fare better than those with an exodus of workers. Migrants tend to work harder, for less money and bring in skills -> which helps drive the economy forward and keeps inflation in check.
3) Involvement in a lot of wars -> wars help develop technology, and in today's world technology = money & power.
4) People will always argue that wealthy countries take from poorer countries and that that's how they got there - well that is true, but only to a very minute extent! But I disagree with all I hear about western countries stealing the wealth out of all the poor countries in Africa and elsewhere! It's a free world for all to compete in and just as in nature, those with the ambition and the power will usually come out on top. There are many stories about people who are born with nothing and muster fortune, and those who were born with everything and muster nothing... But one thing is for sure - you can't keep a good person down! Those who blame what lacks in their lives on others should get off their asses and do something for themselves!
Yes I understand your dilema - try living in a country like South Africa where it's all about your skin colour and never mind your nationality or even when your'e legal or illegal!
On the other hand, I'm a legal immigrant in Ireland where I earn a good living and pay my fair share of taxes - however I have to wait for 5 years before I can get any kind of benifit whatsoever from the state! And yes - illegal's get it all here too! Really frustrating isn't it???
CapeDoctor Forum Posts (137)
RE: What is wrong with having kids??
Call men selfish for being apprehensive about getting involved with a woman with kids, but you have to look at their life situation as well and reallise just how much it impacts on their lives too.As a young single guy I think the following makes me uneasy about a girl with kids:
You know she's gonna have far less free time especially if her kids are young, you also know their's gonna be a biological father in the background! Then there's the issue of kids not accepting you as the 'new guy' in their mummy's life....
Call it selfish if you like but that's how I fear it is.
But in the same breath, if I really liked her and she liked me too, I'm sure I'd learn to accept everything that comes with the package;)