I still wouldn’t call that selfish. You need to indulge yourself to be able to offer your best to other. So you’re really not being selfish, you’re being unselfish towards yourself.
If I can make a comparison: In Buddhism, they teach you to find inner peace and harmony, to reach a state where you are happy with yourself and where you can find a way to shove love, respect and gratitude towards others, and gratitude in your own being.
The Dalia Lama has spent years of his life meditating to reach a stage where he has utmost inner peace. He has devoted himself to it completely, and often shut himself in, from the outside world. Grant it, that’s really like eating a cake, but yet, I’m comparing with him doing something inwards maybe more than any other human has, and that has made him become one of the most generous men we know.
Your love towards yourself, brings great love towards other.
What you are describing is being faithful, but that’s something else. That’s not a feeling, that’s a choice of life, a bit of our moral code, and a preference.
Love is not selfish
For starters, even though they are different kind of love, you can love many at the same time. There is actually no limit to how many you can love, sincerely: Your husband, your children, your mother, your father, your siblings, your grandmother, your best friends, and so on.
But why I think love is the opposite of selfish, is that when you love, you offer the most intimate bit of yourself to other, and you offer it completely. You reveal yourself and you know that you’re making yourself vulnerable, sometimes in the most scary way, but you don’t care. You are there, for them, in the most unselfish way one can be.
Even if you restrict yourself, or only have one to love, that is still not selfish. It is, like I said, you being the most the most generous and unselfish one can be.
By the way, what's this all issue with "concealed"?
Let them carry it around their neck hanging from one of those hip-hop bling-bling thick chains.
Or, there must be a market for it, a special outfit for your doggy, with a sidepocket where you can stick it inside, like cowboys had on saddles for rifles back when.
I'm actually not too worried about that. Whoever thinks it is a great idea to have students at a campus carry weapons is probably not from this planet and I will not understand the alien language anyway.
Had this discussion with another fellow the other day, and I asked whether there isn't a possibility a teacher snaps just as much as a student can.
And we always hear about a kid going on a shooting spree at a school, because it is a big tragedy, but what about all the times when a kid knocks down a teacher, that's not in the news, is it? So, a teacher with a gun, and being knocked down by a kid, and.... well you can imagine the possible scenario.
A friend of mine gave his father one of those as a birthday gift a few years ago. His father was in his late 60’s and could hardly turn on the telly, never mind being updated on all the modern gadgets of this world.
So the two of them are out somewhere in town, his phone rings for the first time, he takes out the phone, answers, after his son has assisted him in which button activates the bloody call, and when the conversation is over my mate, again, has to assist him, now in how to turn it off.
The father, baffled look on his face, looks down on the phone in his hand, then looks at his son, my mate, and totally serious exclaims:
- How the hell did she know I was here?
He thought that to get hold of a person with a mobile phone, you also needed to know where that person was before you could get hold of him/her
And are you asking me about this particular one? I don't know her.
In general?
Well, to me I don't find how you reason behind the question.
You might as well ask me would I date woman with a wooden leg, would I date a woman who's been to jail, would I date a woman who can't read or write, who's blind....
Yes! Is the very simple answer. If I found her attractive, if there was something turning me on, yes, of course I would date her.
If the wooden legged one was one hell of a dancer, that might turn me on, if the one who’d gone to jail was there because she shot an intruder, she can’t read or write but who the hell cares and she’s blind but sings like Mary J Blige…. well, yeah, she’s pregnant, but so what? Is how I feel about it.
So, how about dating a woman who has a seven year old son? Would you have a serious talk with him if he dated such a woman? My gut feeling tells me it’s easier to be an accepted stepfather (by both mother and child) the earlier in the life of the child you are in the union.
CaptainBeirutIII Forum Posts (1,186)
RE: Love is selfish
Cheers, the Penguins look good!