Democrat Field Narrows To Fake Indian, Corrupt Old Man And Basically Dead Guy
The excitement of the Democrat presidential race is heating up as the field narrows down to the make-believe Indian, the corrupt old man and the basically dead guy.Senator Elizabeth Warren seems to have taken a substantial lead with her signature strategy of blending an energetic, professorial persona with complete dishonesty and a socialist agenda that would leave the American economy looking like one of those burned out cities in Gears of War with the gigantic wormy monsters exploding up out of the pavement and devouring everything in sight, then returning to their offices at the IRS.
At a recent rally attended by 150-thousand wildly cheering complete idiots and college students, but I repeat myself, Warren said, “As someone who has pretended to be a minority for career advantage my whole life, I understand the struggle of black people like Justin Trudeau and Virginia Governor Ralph Northam. And as a woman who lied about getting fired for being pregnant to make myself seem a victim when, as an American woman, I’m really among one of the most privileged categories of human being on earth, I think I understand how feminism works as well.”
Bernie Sanders, meanwhile, tried to showcase his socialist philosophy by having a heart attack and then insisting he be taken to Cuba for the free health care. He’s gotten back on the campaign trail, though some reporters have noticed he’s now made of wood, and the guy standing next to him moves his lips when Sanders speaks.
Joe Biden held his latest rally under a bus, where he’d been thrown by House Democrats who have developed a brilliant new plan to destroy Donald Trump by exposing Biden’s lifetime of nepotistic cynicism and corruption.
As for Donald Trump himself, he is taking advantage of the weak Democrat field by climbing to the top of the Empire State Building with a screaming blonde in one hand while he swipes airplanes out of the sky with the other.
Who among us is not looking forward to 2020?
Tag: Satire
Comments (15)
Ooo - That's a toughie
I'm gonna go out on a limb & guess...
'Crat Political Strategerists?
Assuming 'Crats HAVE political strategerists, of course
The acting classes really paid off
But given the 'Crat Prez contenders & the 'Publicans' bulging War Chest -
A landslide for The Don (and 'Publicans clear down the ticket) is a possibility.
Great! Thank you @HillaryClinton. You, the queen of warmongers, embodiment of corruption, and personification of the rot that has sickened the Democratic Party for so long, have finally come out from behind the curtain."
I wish she'd stop beating 'round the bush & say what's on her mind.
not that long ago Trumpo only needed to take a drink of water and you lefties were burying him .
Bit of a temper perhaps, yet not surprisingly, is often wont to digressing into the very language she decrys. A product of a misspent youth....lol.
You are truly a hipocrite...behave yourself...