Online Dating: Risky, Dangerous, and Deadly...
This great article serves as a warning for all who may consider online dating to be safe.
Risky business: The dangers of online dating and how to protect yourself
By Diana Falzone Published April 12, 2016 FoxNews.com
Police believe Ingrid Lyne, a Seattle-area mother of three, was the victim of homicide after dismembered remains were found a day after her disappearance.
Unlike singles in the '70s, who cruised bars and discos and risked looking for love in all the wrong places, tens of millions of singles each day join and log on to online dating sites with the belief that their efforts to find love and companionship are safe and secure.
But the apparent murder and dismemberment of Ingrid Lyne, a 40-year-old Seattle-area mother of three, has sent shockwaves throughout the cyber-romance world, with many begging the question: Is anyone safe?
Lyne disappeared last Friday after leaving to meet a date, who police identified as John Robert Charlton, 37. Her ex-husband reported her missing on Saturday — and a dismembered body, including a severed head and foot tentatively identified as Lyne's, were discovered Monday in a recycling bin in Seattle’s Central District. Friends said Lyne met Charlton a few months earlier through an as-yet-unnamed online dating site. Charlton reportedly has a lengthy rap sheet, including misdemeanor assaults — but it’s unlikely his dating profile mentioned that detail.
So, how do you protect yourself when you try online dating?
Bruce Anderson, director of Cyber Intelligence & Investigations, encourages cyber-daters to conduct a background check.
“You should always do a background check on the person that you are dating,” Anderson told FoxNews.com. “You should consider hiring a [private investigator] to run a background check and criminal check on the person, as well as a deep dive (OSINT) Open Source Intelligence Search. If this person has been around or successful, there will be a lot of information on them.”
A background check could be a wise move considering most dating websites do not conduct one. Under Match.com's "Terms of Use Agreement," it clearly states that the company is not liable should you have a date with death. Similar warnings exist on popular sites eHarmony, Farmers Only, and OKCupid, among others.
Here is an excerpt from Match.com under the subcategory "Your Interactions with Other Members."
“YOU ARE SOLELY RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR INTERACTIONS WITH OTHER MEMBERS. YOU UNDERSTAND THAT THE COMPANY CURRENTLY DOES NOT CONDUCT CRIMINAL BACKGROUND CHECKS OR SCREENINGS ON ITS MEMBERS. THE COMPANY ALSO DOES NOT INQUIRE INTO THE BACKGROUNDS OF ALL OF ITS MEMBERS OR ATTEMPT TO VERIFY THE STATEMENTS OF ITS MEMBERS. THE COMPANY MAKES NO REPRESENTATIONS OR WARRANTIES AS TO THE CONDUCT OF MEMBERS OR THEIR COMPATIBILITY WITH ANY CURRENT OR FUTURE MEMBERS. THE COMPANY RESERVES THE RIGHT TO CONDUCT ANY CRIMINAL BACKGROUND CHECK OR OTHER SCREENINGS (SUCH AS SEX OFFENDER REGISTER SEARCHES), AT ANY TIME AND USING AVAILABLE PUBLIC RECORDS."
Still, clinical psychologist Dr. Chloe Carmichael said even Charlton's criminal background was not enough to make an assertion he was a real threat — and that the public shouldn't be quick to point the finger at online dating.
“It's easy to focus on the online dating aspect here, but really this could have happened to the victim if she had met Charlton at a bar or anywhere else," Carmichael said. "They had apparently been dating for one or two months, so it's not as if she broke the obvious safety rules like going somewhere alone with him on a first date. It's unclear whether she knew about his criminal history of misdemeanor violence, but even if she did, it would not be reasonable to think that would be a tip-off that he's a depraved killer.”
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Comments (14)
The husband is always the prime suspect as you know, and forensics will show all in a fairly short time,hopefully !
It's hard to believe that a serial killer would wait all that time before his psycopathic needs were satisfied, why not the 2nd or 3rd Date, and he wouldnot be the prime target then, whereas, being with her for a number of months puts him right in the centre.
In my humble opinion, most killers, who do it for the love of killing usually don't bother to date, they may go on a date, arrange to meet but are usually savvy, leaving no email trace or mobile phone trace.
Time will tell, but it serves as a warning for us all.
I feel terribly sorry for the poor woman, what a dreadful death, may she rest in peace.
At some point in your life you look around and realize there is no-one you know that you want to get closer to. At that point you either accept this is it, as good and interactive as life gets, or you take a chance on stepping out, trying to meet new people.
There are safety precautions but sure, after a month or so of dating, you aren't following them as rigidly. Your new person has become real. It has to come down to gut feel. Do you trust someone, at gut level, or not?
The scary part of dating, however you met someone, is when you continue to see someone because you'd rather ignore your gut reaction than be alone.
That's a terrible, terrible story. Heard a horrendous one today of a man who beheaded his common-law wife, smashed her head and flushed it down the loo. I don't know how they met - but there are some sick, sick people out there. You can meet them through work, in a bar, or on-line. Don't drive people indoors, just teach safety.
That's exactly the reason why I never met anyone I met here online alone. I met one a long time ago but I had 2 friends with me and we met at the mall...full of people.
The thought that I could be dating a bad person and end up dismembered is terrifying. Many sickos and psychos are lurking everywhere...going out with a person I barely know is a big NO for me
I'll stick to blogging here..
I totally agree! When I have met someone here in the states, I always meet them in a public place where there are many other people!
That made my skin crawl...scary...
The boyfriend has a criminal past...he also had scratches on his arms and chest...his parents put a restraining order on him...it seems he is a likely suspect...