too independent? (25)

An independent woman can move her furniture by herself and an independent man can do the cooking for himself, so in the end they both can easily end up being alone :) Maybe you should sometimes let your man feel strong; ask him for some help with moving furniture or something like that :)

without further detail it sounds like he was an idiot

so, this is getting interesting. Thus I just want to mention that
we have not been living together, or even dating for a very long time (thus there were no discussions on who is moving furniture or who is doing cooking).This was rather new and...how do you show a man in the very begynning that you like him very much?

There is only one way to solve any situation... communication. Since men are from Mars and women from Venus the time delay is quite hard to overcome. But my advice is just simply ask him what it is he wants from you. In some kind of soft setting is ideal candlelight wine (or beer... no guess not romantic enough )
When the mood is right you can get a man to fess up to anything.

my two € cents worth

I am a very independant woman, i work two jobs to keep myself in the style im accustomed to and i dont suffer fools gladly,im afraid that i too have been told that i scare the men off,maybe one day ill meet an independant guy that understands i need my life too..

I agree with most posts.
Some people want your vulnerability so they can inject their being on you. What they have to offer might be so little, less than what you've already accomplished for yourself. So, they want to void all your work by injecting their...most of the time poison!
I head a boyfriend who decided to become always sad so I could be extremely weak and take care of them. Strong people don't need to do that. I'm me, you are you, lets cooperate in this life instead of vassalage!

Which means, people really do not to check their parteners emotional level before they venture into a problem. Last week, a friend of mine wanted to match me with a great guy, intelligent, who had as priorities: his daughter and church. I thought it wouldn't be fine, although he seems sweet. I was the one who wouldn't commit myself to church...not as much as he seems to be "fanatic". I'd blow one day.

Some men like their women compliant. This is not a word that is used much any more, but it is still valid as an explaination for this phenomenon.

Some women like their men compliant too.

In the wider sense of this word, it means being needed, or to be more precise, letting them believe that you need them, (as opposed to just want them in your life).

All of this, (independance and compliance), is just so much rubbish brainwashed thinking and learned behaviour, and game-playing, but to some people it is still important when finding a partner who fits in with their (limited) thinking.

I actually like indepedent women .. a woman should be a partner and have equal say in a relationship ... she's not some doll to be gagged and tied .. well, not in the wrong time and place ..