How you handle it? (118)
Ashes: It´s tough Laura, and very, I lost my first child...I then had three more and very Healthy I must say.
People used to say...oh...you will get over it...not my case.
Easy to say, but in Daily Life, all we can do is cope with it...time does help, that much I can say.
I don´t know what has happened to you...that´s ok...just deal with it one day at a time...try and stay calm, surround yourself with people you love and love you.
People used to say...oh...you will get over it...not my case.
Easy to say, but in Daily Life, all we can do is cope with it...time does help, that much I can say.
I don´t know what has happened to you...that´s ok...just deal with it one day at a time...try and stay calm, surround yourself with people you love and love you.
Thank you for sharing, Ashes. I’d think the pain of loosing a child must be worst there is. So sorry it happened in your life.
And thanks for asking…
No, thank God nothing bad happened,
it’s just a hypothetical question.
I once came across someone who was managing an absolutely horrible predicament in a very different way than I ever saw any other person did. And was curious how it’s ever possible and how others approach it.
Either it’s a strong will power, or such an incredible zest for life, or somekind of wisdom…
Ashes:
I don´t know if you are a beleiver or not, this did help me, and it does every day....as this is not the only sad thing that has happened to me....It´s Life...unfortunateley...not, "A Garden full of Roses" as we would all like it to be....
Bless You dear
I don´t know if you are a beleiver or not, this did help me, and it does every day....as this is not the only sad thing that has happened to me....It´s Life...unfortunateley...not, "A Garden full of Roses" as we would all like it to be....
Bless You dear
Yes, believers often find strengths in their faith, I'd think.
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Polarbutterfly: Losing a loved one was and still is the
hardest thing to go through.And although
it's been years,it's still so very heartbreaking,
especially for my children (teens).
I guess what's kept me grounded is the fact that
I have no choice but to endure the hurt and the heartache.
Life does go on.So now,I smile and hug my loved ones
a little longer.
Good post.
hardest thing to go through.And although
it's been years,it's still so very heartbreaking,
especially for my children (teens).
I guess what's kept me grounded is the fact that
I have no choice but to endure the hurt and the heartache.
Life does go on.So now,I smile and hug my loved ones
a little longer.
Good post.
Ditto Polar. Loosing someone so close to you,
as hard as it is, teaches us how to appreciate every moment spent with people we love.
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Laura25: When you face something awful in your life, really awful, how you handle it?
I've known a person who in life's worst/toughest situations would do as much as she could and then was able to put it right out of her mind. Always looking cheerful, and smiley, and very pleasant. Not even loosing her sleep.
A great gift.
Can be cultivated if you work at it?
I believe it can but don't think I'd ever could...
I've known a person who in life's worst/toughest situations would do as much as she could and then was able to put it right out of her mind. Always looking cheerful, and smiley, and very pleasant. Not even loosing her sleep.
A great gift.
Can be cultivated if you work at it?
I believe it can but don't think I'd ever could...
People like that are said to be those who live the longest.
I believe we could solve that problem by simply killing them, but maybe that's just me?
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Damn Laura..... You had me worried for a moment.
Wondering what "IT" you were speaking of..
Wondering what "IT" you were speaking of..
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kissmedeeply: axe & shovel
Like all the solutions in life reduce to an axe and a shovel!
Clearly you've never been in situations where bailing wire, duct tape, and a sturdy rope are also needed, Joanne!
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Thank you all for your replies, guys. Very interested in every single one.
Gotta run now. Will read it all again tonight.
And again, it’s a hypothetical question. I should've mentioned it in my OP.
Gotta run now. Will read it all again tonight.
And again, it’s a hypothetical question. I should've mentioned it in my OP.
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Somechick: "I delt with the loss of my late husband one day at a time.It wasn't easy but with some encouageing words from a CS member I came through it and I'm now OOPS!!begining a brand new chapter in my life."
Okay...to begin that new chapter in your life..."dealt," "encouraging," and "beginning," will start you on the right course, Some. 
Okay...to begin that new chapter in your life..."dealt," "encouraging," and "beginning," will start you on the right course, Some.
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Big_John: Life sometimes can throw several hard things to deal with at once. We can fold our hand and disappear into pity and isolation or we can decide to move forward and realized we are in control of our emotions, mental happiness and future.
We couldn't control what happened, but we can control how we deal with it.
A little background into my experience: I lost a house to hurricane Katrina, my only brother to lung cancer, my mother to a heart attack and my wife to lung cancer in a very short period of time. Life was hard for a while.
Today I feel normal and look forward to plans I have developed.
We couldn't control what happened, but we can control how we deal with it.
A little background into my experience: I lost a house to hurricane Katrina, my only brother to lung cancer, my mother to a heart attack and my wife to lung cancer in a very short period of time. Life was hard for a while.
Today I feel normal and look forward to plans I have developed.
Yes, John...but no offense, man, you're a freak! Of course, I mean that in a good way. Almost no one could deal with what you've gone through and emerge with that attitude. More power to you!
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Laura25: When you face something awful in your life, really awful, how you handle it?
I've known a person who in life's worst/toughest situations would do as much as she could and then was able to put it right out of her mind. Always looking cheerful, and smiley, and very pleasant. Not even loosing her sleep.
A great gift.
Can be cultivated if you work at it?
I believe it can but don't think I'd ever could...
I've known a person who in life's worst/toughest situations would do as much as she could and then was able to put it right out of her mind. Always looking cheerful, and smiley, and very pleasant. Not even loosing her sleep.
A great gift.
Can be cultivated if you work at it?
I believe it can but don't think I'd ever could...
Yes, it can be cultivated if one works on it properly. It's a tough cognitive process, but once you can master it, nothing can stand in the way of happiness...Ultimately, it's a choice of putting things into proper perspective. Only the very few can pull it off.
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Laura25: Thank you for sharing, Ashes. I’d think the pain of loosing a child must be worst there is. So sorry it happened in your life.
And thanks for asking…
No, thank God nothing bad happened,
it’s just a hypothetical question.
I once came across someone who was managing an absolutely horrible predicament in a very different way than I ever saw any other person did. And was curious how it’s ever possible and how others approach it.
Either it’s a strong will power, or such an incredible zest for life, or somekind of wisdom…
Yes, believers often find strengths in their faith, I'd think.
And thanks for asking…
No, thank God nothing bad happened,
it’s just a hypothetical question.
I once came across someone who was managing an absolutely horrible predicament in a very different way than I ever saw any other person did. And was curious how it’s ever possible and how others approach it.
Either it’s a strong will power, or such an incredible zest for life, or somekind of wisdom…
Yes, believers often find strengths in their faith, I'd think.
I used to think that. Until my god, Dionysus, started "recycling" my lite beer sacrifices all over my porch.
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what will you do in that situation ask the doctor to give me a prescription[/quote When my dad died i went out of control. Non-functional! It was the first of the worse times in my life. He gave me meds and thank God it helped. Then when my mom was very sick i again went through months of not eating and being sick. Again, I had to have my meds changed. I believe in God and I know He has the power to heal. He puts the solutions to our problems in our lives and it's up to us to take them. I did and i got better. I don't deal with tragedy too well. So, although i didn't ask for a prescription i got it and i got better.
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Ambrose2007: Yes, John...but no offense, man, you're a freak! Of course, I mean that in a good way. Almost no one could deal with what you've gone through and emerge with that attitude. More power to you!
I remember the exact moment that I knew I was going to be okay. It was in a group grief counseling session I had been going to in order to handle the things that occurred. A lady was talking about the lost of her husband. She was crying and really depressed. Someone in the room asked when and how long ago did her husband pass away. She stated about 5 years ago.
That is when I told myself I would not be like that 5 years from then. I got up and walked out of the session and got on with my life.
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Big_John: I remember the exact moment that I knew I was going to be okay. It was in a group grief counseling session I had been going to in order to handle the things that occurred. A lady was talking about the lost of her husband. She was crying and really depressed. Someone in the room asked when and how long ago did her husband pass away. She stated about 5 years ago.
That is when I told myself I would not be like that 5 years from then. I got up and walked out of the session and got on with my life.
That is when I told myself I would not be like that 5 years from then. I got up and walked out of the session and got on with my life.
Yep, power to you John! Impressive stuff there my friend. Good for you.
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StressFree: Yes, it can be cultivated if one works on it properly. It's a tough cognitive process, but once you can master it, nothing can stand in the way of happiness...Ultimately, it's a choice of putting things into proper perspective. Only the very few can pull it off.
Thank you Stress
You got it right - that's what I am curious about.Yes, I agree that very few could master it...
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Ambrose2007: Somechick: "I delt with the loss of my late husband one day at a time.It wasn't easy but with some encouageing words from a CS member I came through it and I'm now OOPS!!begining a brand new chapter in my life."
Okay...to begin that new chapter in your life..."dealt," "encouraging," and "beginning," will start you on the right course, Some.
Okay...to begin that new chapter in your life..."dealt," "encouraging," and "beginning," will start you on the right course, Some.
Yes J I am.I'm getting married in September so I guess you could say that's the right course.This guy's not a jerk like the other one from before.
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too make this not too personal
I have lost my mother-lost children-almost lost my life-lost my innocence-been beaten by my "love"-and homeless
I know where I have been it makes me stronger and know that no matter what happens I can get through it. I don't feel sorry for myself but I love harder and work harder than I ever had. I am optimistic even though at times I don't want to be. No matter what awful things happen you are stronger because of them
it's the people who think they are victims and the world owe them something I can't stand
I have lost my mother-lost children-almost lost my life-lost my innocence-been beaten by my "love"-and homeless
I know where I have been it makes me stronger and know that no matter what happens I can get through it. I don't feel sorry for myself but I love harder and work harder than I ever had. I am optimistic even though at times I don't want to be. No matter what awful things happen you are stronger because of them
it's the people who think they are victims and the world owe them something I can't stand
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Ambrose2007: I used to think that. Until my god, Dionysus, started "recycling" my lite beer sacrifices all over my porch.
May I suggest
a) stop calling him that, he prefers to be called Bacchus,
b) it's a sign - you had to restore this porch ages ago
Oh, and while you are at that, make it{the porch} a wrap-around
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somechick: Yes J I am.I'm getting married in September so I guess you could say that's the right course.This guy's not a jerk like the other one from before.
Wow!Congrats Anna!
Lots of love and many happy years together to you!
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littlesusie: In the time of my lost, I had my children to fall back on, but when it came to the point that I had to be by myself, I thought I had it all plan out on how I would deal with the lost and the empty house. I would work 15 hrs. a day then come home and clean house until 2a.m. in the morning, I would be so tried that when I did go to bed I didn't even think, because I would be getting up to get ready for work at 5:30a.m. This did work, I didn't have time to think, had the cleaness house around. But it did put a toll on my health, in 6 months I lost 103 pounds ( I did need to loose the weight, but not that way. I never really cry for my husband, until one day i was washing dishes and drop a dish and for some reason I just sat in the middle of the floor and cry my eyes out, I was sad for myself and mad at him for leaving me. But at the same time I relize that the things that I was doing wasn't working that well. I had to face it and talk about it and try to go on with my life. It has been 3 years now and I have decided to start dating again and see how it goes, and hope for the best.
Susie
Susie
Tough! Thank you for sharing, Susie. I am glad you found a way not to bottle it all inside for any longer
Facing it and talking it out - the best solution to overcome grief. That, and the time of course.
Save dating to you.
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We couldn't control what happened, but we can control how we deal with it.
A little background into my experience: I lost a house to hurricane Katrina, my only brother to lung cancer, my mother to a heart attack and my wife to lung cancer in a very short period of time. Life was hard for a while.
Today I feel normal and look forward to plans I have developed.