Maybe It Wasn't Enough (34)
venere08: No. And Sassy, no need to beat yourself up. You did what you did at the time, having the reasons you had at the time. NOW, is a different time in your life. The past is gone. Focus on what you have in front of you.
Venere, My gosh it has been a long time.
Yes, I do agree and for the most part he does not come to mind. This has just been a crazy day for me I guess
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sassy49senior: Venere, My gosh it has been a long time. Yes, I do agree and for the most part he does not come to mind. This has just been a crazy day for me I guess
It has, hasn't it? Hope you have been well.
I know what you mean. You never think of a person, then one day, something triggers so many past thoughts, and then the feelings.
Then you shake yourself off, and call a friend.
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tennesseejudy: Sassy, It is so good to see you being yourself again. I am sure if your marriage did not work you had good reason. What do you think of "The Shack"? It is very different and makes you think. I had to read it twice and so loved Sarayu.
Hi Judy, Yes it does make you wonder and PAPA was definitely a surprise. I am about 3/4 finished but know I will have to read it again.
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venere08: It has, hasn't it? Hope you have been well.
I know what you mean. You never think of a person, then one day, something triggers so many past thoughts, and then the feelings.
Then you shake yourself off, and call a friend.
I know what you mean. You never think of a person, then one day, something triggers so many past thoughts, and then the feelings.
Then you shake yourself off, and call a friend.
My best friend will be phoning me tomorrow night and believe it or not, he is also from Australia.
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If its meant to be it will, thats my motto to this day....and can guarentee that mine wasnt meant to be .........
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sassy49senior: My best friend will be phoning me tomorrow night and believe it or not, he is also from Australia.
Ah, there you go. Well timed, sassy.
I remember a while ago, you mentioning your friend in Australia.
How perfect.
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Thank you all for your caring enough to help me through that wee bit of a guilt trip. I guess I knew it was the right decision but you dear CS friends made it clear for me.
Now an up date on what is going on. I guess I tried to be super woman and bent my knee a little farther than I should have.My son took me out to ER about 2 hours ago and I finally received a shot so I could at least sleep. I am back home but will not be on much as I will be sleeping ( I hope) for several hours.
May you all have a great week-end. To those who sent me mails I will get back to you as soon as possible. I may be down for awhile, but not for long. 
Now an up date on what is going on. I guess I tried to be super woman and bent my knee a little farther than I should have.My son took me out to ER about 2 hours ago and I finally received a shot so I could at least sleep. I am back home but will not be on much as I will be sleeping ( I hope) for several hours.
May you all have a great week-end. To those who sent me mails I will get back to you as soon as possible. I may be down for awhile, but not for long.
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BUMP
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sassy49senior: Have any of you been in this situation where you think you may have rushed into the leaving thing?
Only when I was feeling lonely. I've regretted the way I split with some people & what I never had a chance to say before I ended it, but honestly, those relationships would never have worked out in the long run and I knew it.
It's really only in my 30's that I began to be the one to end relationships - in my 20's I would hang on for dear life even if I was miserable. I always thought it would be easier to be the one to call it off but if anything it's harder. At least if you get dumped you get to hate them for a little while lol. If you call it off, you're left with the responsibility of what you've done & wondering if things could have ever been different if you hadn't called it.
So I think the questions you have are normal but I honestly believe that if you truly wanted to be with him, you still would be.
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hopefloats: Sassy, you are not the only one with regrets from previous relationships and/or marriages. After all, no one is perfect. I think for the most part everyone lives and learns. The wisest ones learn from their mistakes and make the best of today and is what to come. The less wiser ones go about continually making the same mistakes and then wonder why things never change for the better for them. Sorry for rambling. And sorry for not reading the whole thread. But I just wanted to comment. Hugs to you sis!
Thank You Hun, I did finally come to that realization and think I knew it all along. Was just one of my funky mood days yesterday. Then if you read back one page you will see that I also had a very rough night and spent most of the day sedated as I made a stupid mistake with my knee. Some of the meds are finally wearing off so hopefully I can stay awake long enough to check out the forums.
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Dear friend,
I think most of us have made mistakes in our lives. I was also married 19 years and look back over that all the time. What could I or should I have done.
I spent the last few days with my sick father. Last night we watched a movie together. He cried, I cried.
He said to me I have loved your mother for many years. She would not tell me for many years that she loved me. Her mother could not express her feelings nor can my mother.
But my father and myself do not have a problem. We watched the movie together and my father cried, actually cried. I thought (about the movie) how can someone find their true love to have them die?
Today as I cooked brunch for my father I cried as I tried to talk to him about the movie. I said how long will it be till I find that happiness that I long for dad?
He said it could be tomorrow or never. I know this is off subject Sassy but that you would not mind.
I guess that we never know when "our" happiness will come to us.
I think most of us have made mistakes in our lives. I was also married 19 years and look back over that all the time. What could I or should I have done.
I spent the last few days with my sick father. Last night we watched a movie together. He cried, I cried.
He said to me I have loved your mother for many years. She would not tell me for many years that she loved me. Her mother could not express her feelings nor can my mother.
But my father and myself do not have a problem. We watched the movie together and my father cried, actually cried. I thought (about the movie) how can someone find their true love to have them die?
Today as I cooked brunch for my father I cried as I tried to talk to him about the movie. I said how long will it be till I find that happiness that I long for dad?
He said it could be tomorrow or never. I know this is off subject Sassy but that you would not mind.
I guess that we never know when "our" happiness will come to us.
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sassy49senior: We were only together 2 years and I feel as though I should have tried more to make it work.
With all due respect, may I enquire why?
Apart from the important religios reason, I don't know of any other rules that say two strangers HAVE to continue being together and trying to make something work if it won't?
Wise men say that by continuing in a poor relationship, as many as 4 people are hurt - you, your significant other, the person who could be very happy with you, and the person who could be very happy with him. That stops me from questioning whether I did the right thing by leaving a relationship after a fair dose of attempts to make it work.
It is my strong belief that relationships shouldn't be THAT much work, mutual understanding CAN be pretty natural with the right person...
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amelie13: Only when I was feeling lonely. I've regretted the way I split with some people & what I never had a chance to say before I ended it, but honestly, those relationships would never have worked out in the long run and I knew it.
It's really only in my 30's that I began to be the one to end relationships - in my 20's I would hang on for dear life even if I was miserable. I always thought it would be easier to be the one to call it off but if anything it's harder. At least if you get dumped you get to hate them for a little while lol. If you call it off, you're left with the responsibility of what you've done & wondering if things could have ever been different if you hadn't called it.
So I think the questions you have are normal but I honestly believe that if you truly wanted to be with him, you still would be.
It's really only in my 30's that I began to be the one to end relationships - in my 20's I would hang on for dear life even if I was miserable. I always thought it would be easier to be the one to call it off but if anything it's harder. At least if you get dumped you get to hate them for a little while lol. If you call it off, you're left with the responsibility of what you've done & wondering if things could have ever been different if you hadn't called it.
So I think the questions you have are normal but I honestly believe that if you truly wanted to be with him, you still would be.
Wanted to send you a flower for your post but found out I am in the range of blocked countries
Your posts do make a lot of sense 
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We all wonder from time to time, should we,could we have done things differently, or tried harder. That is a hard question to answer. We do what we do with the knoweledge we have at the time and the understanding or feeling we have around a situition. It is not just one partner in the relationship that has to do the work, but both. You did what you needed to do at that time. So dont go over it, get on with your life and enjoy whatever comes your way. Everyone has these thoughts from time to time and I guess as we mature we ponder things more. I grew up with a saying what's meant for you will not go by you. So if their is something to save in this situition there will be another chance.
If that is what is meant to be. I wish you happiness in you future. Love and light, JCLady