No one wants to hear about how hurt you've been. (184)
tinypixie: Oh mr.gardenhackle! your soft
Side is beginning to show through now,
Awwwwww how sweet.
And here I was thinking that your rantings about
How women ought to behave were sounding
Something like an oink oink would say
Side is beginning to show through now,
Awwwwww how sweet.
And here I was thinking that your rantings about
How women ought to behave were sounding
Something like an oink oink would say
I did try to say that it's both men and women that really should can the drama when they're dating if they're looking for the best outcome from the dates. It's not a "how women should behave thing". Guys can be just as bad. And I've heard more than one woman remark about dates that spent their time together dwelling on their past failed relationships and issues. I don't remember any of those remarks being in the form of "Oh my God, I just had my dream date" sort of discussion, either.
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gardenhackle: I'm sorry. I must have posted the OP in the wrong forum. I thought "dating and relating" was the topic and if my dates spend our time together pouring out pain and suffering, I'm afraid there won't be many dates. As you get serious with someone, you should, of course share concerns and intimate feelings which include fears and disappointments. But I consider that to be somewhere past the "dating" phase. First things first... you have to see if you actually like each other. As intimacy develops, so do the depth of discussions.
And, of course, Pixie, my love, if you feel that pouring out your anguish is a great ice breaking strategy, please don't let me discourage you. I'm just saying it doesn't work well with anyone I've known. It's one of the things that are regularly considered a good recipe for a really bad date.
OK... I've reconsidered what "friendship" means. It means knowing all about you and liking you, anyway. And it also means being honest.... so, honestly... I think the "oh my heart has been broken so many times" routine is bad form for dates. So there we are. We've been honest with each other. Thank you for sharing. :)
And, of course, Pixie, my love, if you feel that pouring out your anguish is a great ice breaking strategy, please don't let me discourage you. I'm just saying it doesn't work well with anyone I've known. It's one of the things that are regularly considered a good recipe for a really bad date.
OK... I've reconsidered what "friendship" means. It means knowing all about you and liking you, anyway. And it also means being honest.... so, honestly... I think the "oh my heart has been broken so many times" routine is bad form for dates. So there we are. We've been honest with each other. Thank you for sharing. :)
True friendship knows no "time", you either ARE a friend or
Not. If pple open up to each other and share what's in their
Heart,its a good thing in my books.
Comforting somebody,who's hurting,be it someone you consider
A friend or not, shows the compassion you have within you.
Sometimes its easier for pple to cry on a strangers shoulders,
And yes, this is where caution is important,lest the stranger
Turn around and use it against you.
But in all these things,wisdom should be used.
As for me,I'm happy to be who I am,with my pms,and my honesty,
And happy to be fully able to express my emotions,wherever,
Whenever and with whomever I want and choose.
I accept pple as they are,even if I don't like them,and if, we
All could learn to do that,without trying to constantly change
Each other,this world would be a better place. Fact.
Its called changing our attitude,towards each other.
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I prefer only to go on dates where the guy is emotionally damaged, rages about his ex, cries about all the money he lost, and compares me to the ex...
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nanners2863: I prefer only to go on dates where the guy is emotionally damaged, rages about his ex, cries about all the money he lost, and compares me to the ex...
Oh! I've met those.Great lot they are.
Though I'm not particular to haveing to carry tissues on these 'dates'.
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nanners2863: I prefer only to go on dates where the guy is emotionally damaged, rages about his ex, cries about all the money he lost, and compares me to the ex...
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Raven0: Oh! I've met those.
Great lot they are.
Though I'm not particular to haveing to carry tissues on these 'dates'.
and the tissues are for??Great lot they are.
Though I'm not particular to haveing to carry tissues on these 'dates'.
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trurorob: and the tissues are for??
When they weep of course!They always do once they get to the "and and and.. she LEFT me" part of the story.
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Raven0: When they weep of course!
They always do once they get to the "and and and.. she LEFT me" part of the story.
ok, just asking!!They always do once they get to the "and and and.. she LEFT me" part of the story.
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gardenhackle: Seriously. Life has it's ups and downs. You may be exiting a long, horrible relationship. Taking that emotional baggage with you on a date or into a new relationship is a sure turnoff except, perhaps, to someone who's controlling.
If you're still licking your wounds from all the damage done by your past relationship, you're not ready for a new one. Put the past behind you, get over your stupid mistakes and choices, figure out why you made them and don't do it again. But for God's sake, move on. If you want to be happy and meet Mr. Right, then please do. And you need to do it in that order because Mr. Right is probably not going to come along if you aren't happy already.
This isn't about anyone in particular, just about life, in general. PMS is a turnoff (Poor Me Syndrome) and it afflicts men and women equally. Of course, if that's how you feel about life, then by all means, go ahead and communicate it because you need to be upfront and you'll get figured out soon enough if you don't. But if that's not who you really are or how you feel day to day, then.... I'd recommend talking about your hopes, aspirations, interests, fascinations and dreams. You're single. You need to have those things and pursue those things and find someone that won't be a roadblock to those things.
And, of course.... that's just my perspective and advice. It's free, so take it for what it's worth, LOL. :)
If you're still licking your wounds from all the damage done by your past relationship, you're not ready for a new one. Put the past behind you, get over your stupid mistakes and choices, figure out why you made them and don't do it again. But for God's sake, move on. If you want to be happy and meet Mr. Right, then please do. And you need to do it in that order because Mr. Right is probably not going to come along if you aren't happy already.
This isn't about anyone in particular, just about life, in general. PMS is a turnoff (Poor Me Syndrome) and it afflicts men and women equally. Of course, if that's how you feel about life, then by all means, go ahead and communicate it because you need to be upfront and you'll get figured out soon enough if you don't. But if that's not who you really are or how you feel day to day, then.... I'd recommend talking about your hopes, aspirations, interests, fascinations and dreams. You're single. You need to have those things and pursue those things and find someone that won't be a roadblock to those things.
And, of course.... that's just my perspective and advice. It's free, so take it for what it's worth, LOL. :)
I remember going to a seminar a few years ago, and everyone had to tell their "story" - it was an eye opening experience for me to realize how I came across to total strangers. A story can be woven of heartache and sorrow, or it can be a story of strength, courage and survival despite the obstacles. Perspective is everything and it was a lesson I never forgot.
Rarely now do I share the past - for that is not me anymore.
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Raven0: I'll remember that.
Great set of hoohaa's and easy clean up!
Exactly..now..don't ask me where I keep my mace...that's private..Great set of hoohaa's and easy clean up!
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Raven0: When they weep of course!
They always do once they get to the "and and and.. she LEFT me" part of the story.
They always do once they get to the "and and and.. she LEFT me" part of the story.
Some of us only cry when they wont leave us
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jonnt: Some of us only cry when they wont leave us
What?You want me to go.. already?
But but but...
*sniffle*
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tinypixie: Are you sure your ready for a new relationship?
Of course I am. So when do we consumate our new relationship? I'll bring the tissues. For the tears, of course.
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Raven0: What?
You want me to go.. already?
But but but...
*sniffle*
There, there, there, here have a tissue!!You want me to go.. already?
But but but...
*sniffle*
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gardenhackle: Of course I am. So when do we consumate our new relationship? I'll bring the tissues. For the tears, of course.
HAHAHaha..ha..Oh wait..
who's gonna cry on that date?
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trurorob: There, there, there, here have a tissue!!
Hey.. you don't have hoohaas... where are you keeping those tissues? 
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LOL!!!!!
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Raven0: What?
You want me to go.. already?
But but but...
*sniffle*
You want me to go.. already?
But but but...
*sniffle*
No you can stay fot a bit longer
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Raven0: Hey.. you don't have hoohaas... where are you keeping those tissues?
Eeeek..mental note..never cry around him..his tissues are damp and smell funny..
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Oh
wait.
No
That was a broken chip in the tube of pringles.
Never mind