Rules of Etiquette......and the lack of (13)
No there is not a lack of etiquette
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Nice to see some classy men around.
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No lack of etiquette? So all of your emails are answered, and noone has ever left you hanging......well then apparantly I stand corrected, perhaps it is only a phenomemnon that happens to me. 
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Netiquette rules are not always followed, people forget sometimes that there is actually a human being on the other side of the computer.
Computer networks are impersonal so it stands to reason that communication via this medium is less personal and people often resort to wild behaviour. Behaviour which they would never use with their family, friends or in the workplace.
I've heard it compared to the way some people behave behind the wheel of a car, cursing and gesturing whilst being protected by another machine, the vehicle they are sitting in.
The golden rule should be, 'would you say it to a person's face?'.
Computer networks are impersonal so it stands to reason that communication via this medium is less personal and people often resort to wild behaviour. Behaviour which they would never use with their family, friends or in the workplace.
I've heard it compared to the way some people behave behind the wheel of a car, cursing and gesturing whilst being protected by another machine, the vehicle they are sitting in.
The golden rule should be, 'would you say it to a person's face?'.
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No there is no lack of ettiquette.
If you wish to use such language then the first step is in your court. Place a photo of yourself. Then the recipient has an idea of whom they could be replying to. That would be good ettiquette in itself.
Secondly the individual always has the right to reply or not to reply.
Just because you walk into a shop does not mean you have to buy anything. The choice is yours.
So it is here on this site. If you want more feedback play on the forums and interact with lots publicly (so to speak) Then when you approach someone offline you will be better recieved.
Remember we are all here for many different reasons. The idea of dating somewhere on that list. But not necessarily the primary reason.
If you wish to use such language then the first step is in your court. Place a photo of yourself. Then the recipient has an idea of whom they could be replying to. That would be good ettiquette in itself.
Secondly the individual always has the right to reply or not to reply.
Just because you walk into a shop does not mean you have to buy anything. The choice is yours.
So it is here on this site. If you want more feedback play on the forums and interact with lots publicly (so to speak) Then when you approach someone offline you will be better recieved.
Remember we are all here for many different reasons. The idea of dating somewhere on that list. But not necessarily the primary reason.
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Pardon me, but I never stated that anyone instigated any approach. There are times when a person is merely replying to anothers initial contact , perhaps asking for more information...then after reavealing information, never getting a reply. So please, don't be so presumptuous....
Also anonymity is a choice, and one I chose to make simply because I am in this public forum..... I saw someone take a swipe at someone because of his age, in a disparaging way, after which he took his photo off his profile... I imagine till these posts get so buried that he can resurface....shame on people for attacking other overe their objective opinions......
Also anonymity is a choice, and one I chose to make simply because I am in this public forum..... I saw someone take a swipe at someone because of his age, in a disparaging way, after which he took his photo off his profile... I imagine till these posts get so buried that he can resurface....shame on people for attacking other overe their objective opinions......
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Ahhh But you are using a word of the english language to make a point which you at the time are abusing. It is called double standards.
If you have an opinion, that is good. But if it is not worded correctly you are going to find criticism.
The extra information been supplied; is enough for reciever to decide no more contact. Not replying is the best way not to encourage further contact. So ettiquette has not been abused.
If you have an opinion, that is good. But if it is not worded correctly you are going to find criticism.
The extra information been supplied; is enough for reciever to decide no more contact. Not replying is the best way not to encourage further contact. So ettiquette has not been abused.
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I agree that leading someone up the garden path is wrong.. i.e. giving them the impression that ur interested reeling them in then disappearing...however u shouldn't have to feel obliged to engage with someone.. its like a really drunken guy walking up to a girl to chat her up... should the girl just be polite and put up with the offensive behaviour...it just a matter of being straight up I think
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I always try to at least 1x answer amessage,flower or try a hello on im when someone comes on.I feel that is courtesy.However if someone continues to contact me,after I made my point clear of where I stand with them,I don't feel I owe a letter again.Besides some people get o much mail they don't get to it all right away,or maybe they are unable to use pc for some reason,give it time.
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Yes being straight up is good. And highly commendable.
But how often have you experienced the situation where the other person just won't accept no for an answer.
There is always the exception to the rule.
But you the responder (The responder being anyone) don't know the background of the recipient. They may have been down this path so often that they know its safer to just ignore than reply.
The responder if ignored, needs to consider the other and what they have experienced.
Ettiquette says if you reply and are ignored then you weren't welcome. Or is that commonsense.
But how often have you experienced the situation where the other person just won't accept no for an answer.
There is always the exception to the rule.
But you the responder (The responder being anyone) don't know the background of the recipient. They may have been down this path so often that they know its safer to just ignore than reply.
The responder if ignored, needs to consider the other and what they have experienced.
Ettiquette says if you reply and are ignored then you weren't welcome. Or is that commonsense.
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I agree with this statement....if someone is being persistent, than there really isn't much other choice.... agreed. The only other thing is to block them, which is rather agressive also....
But in considering rules of etiquette, it is also not polite to attempt repeated engagements with someone who would rather be left alone either.......thus the other side of the etiquette coin.
I guess it all depends on the individual, and what they are comfortable with....there may be no right, or no wrong in consideration of the points being made. My advice to everyone is to grow a few extra layers of skin thickness before engaging in online dating.....
But in considering rules of etiquette, it is also not polite to attempt repeated engagements with someone who would rather be left alone either.......thus the other side of the etiquette coin.
I guess it all depends on the individual, and what they are comfortable with....there may be no right, or no wrong in consideration of the points being made. My advice to everyone is to grow a few extra layers of skin thickness before engaging in online dating.....
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I think that anyone who portrays themselves inappropriately doesn't deserve a response, taking your drunken analogy into consideration.
But the normal process of answering someones request for additional information, in a dignified manner, should at least be met with a dignified response...... I guess, its up to the individual, but surely, consideration to others will not hurt....in this forum, we are all incapable of putting each other in harms way.....so maybe it wont happen today, but we should all atleast think about it.....
But the normal process of answering someones request for additional information, in a dignified manner, should at least be met with a dignified response...... I guess, its up to the individual, but surely, consideration to others will not hurt....in this forum, we are all incapable of putting each other in harms way.....so maybe it wont happen today, but we should all atleast think about it.....
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Created: Dec 2007
Last Viewed: Apr 24
Last Commented: Dec 2007
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People will spend time sharing information about themselves, taking time to write emails, only to have correspondences go unanswered. If anyone could accuse anyone of playing games, I can't think of any larger game than the lack of common courtesy, to someones sincere advances, in a forum designed for social contact. It will take a general consensus of this community to implement a change.........comments?