The Ex Won,the Kids Lost,Where Do You Go From Here? (123)
Thanks for the help friend,my son will be 12 next year and I will do as you say. I know he will still want to be with me. My daughter will also,but she will only be 10 next year.
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Don't worry about the girl being only 10 because:
A. Courts do not like to separate children and if the 12 yr old goes with you...
B. A decent attorney will be able to find ways to let the court know that the 10 yr old wants to be with you two even if they don't allow her to testify directly. It may be as simple as - the boy talking about "We" or relating something he saw where either he wasnt treated well and she was there or that he saw something negative done to her..
I'm assuming you're really serious about this.
Go to the courthouse and find out when contested custody cases are taking place in that court.
Attend! and look for the following:
Which attorneys can argue well?
Which ones does the judge like and dislike?
When you see a case end - talk to the client and ask if you may call her or him later to ask about how they felt about their attorney.
This is much better than asking for recommendations: people recommend their friends.
A. Courts do not like to separate children and if the 12 yr old goes with you...
B. A decent attorney will be able to find ways to let the court know that the 10 yr old wants to be with you two even if they don't allow her to testify directly. It may be as simple as - the boy talking about "We" or relating something he saw where either he wasnt treated well and she was there or that he saw something negative done to her..
I'm assuming you're really serious about this.
Go to the courthouse and find out when contested custody cases are taking place in that court.
Attend! and look for the following:
Which attorneys can argue well?
Which ones does the judge like and dislike?
When you see a case end - talk to the client and ask if you may call her or him later to ask about how they felt about their attorney.
This is much better than asking for recommendations: people recommend their friends.
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jonahstrials: Raised my kids for 10yrs,then to suddenly lose custody of them. I don't even know where to start. My life has always been waiting for the 6days every other week I had them. How do you begin again?
A week-long cruise to the Bahamas?
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Ok so much for the serious legal advice...
Now lighten up a bit and write a thread saying on the advice of my online attorney to assist in my custody case I am looking for
A stable person who wants a relationship that will last until my next court date
Each applicant must list all arrests and visits by Child Protective Services.
Must look good sitting in the witness chair....
Now lighten up a bit and write a thread saying on the advice of my online attorney to assist in my custody case I am looking for
A stable person who wants a relationship that will last until my next court date
Each applicant must list all arrests and visits by Child Protective Services.
Must look good sitting in the witness chair....
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and since you're going to be so busy
Ill go with Lacali on the Bahamas Cruise! Psst I lived in Cal - went to undergrad at Berkeley.
Ill go with Lacali on the Bahamas Cruise! Psst I lived in Cal - went to undergrad at Berkeley.
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I think I need to agree with you on this one? Something isn't adding up ..... there are always 3 sides of the story.... your side, her side and somewhere in there lies the truth. I feel for both sides of any parent's custody battle. I have 3 children that I raise on my own, their father doesn't even bother with them none the less help to support them financially... so there really are losers all over... most of the all the kids.. who need to grow up with both parents...
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After haveing 8 years to think about this (since my divorce) I have stopped blaming the court for taking sides (his or mine) in a custody battle. I think that part of the problem is that more parents than not will go into the court with bad intentions... make up lies, stories, basically say anything they need to to make the other look bad. And the judge sits and listens to story after story, lie after lie and really has no way of knowing who is telling the truth. Eventually he/she needs to go on their gut, is this the right thing? Probably not but what else do they have to go on.... divorce is tough and you couldn't pay me enough to sit on that bench and decide the lives of children...
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jonahstrials: Raised my kids for 10yrs,then to suddenly lose custody of them. I don't even know where to start. My life has always been waiting for the 6days every other week I had them. How do you begin again?
I am going through the same thing...... Just hang in there as everyone says. It is more stressful then anything else in the world, because like you I want the best for my little babys. There mom got preg. by some guy so not only can she take care of two, now she has a third one.... It always seem's like just because the mother gave birth to the kids that she gets everything handed to her... Not in my life will she ever get anything handed to her by the court system.. I will fight tooth and nail to have them. They are what I live for....
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stefonline: Because of this type of thing exactly I have made a vow never to use the services of a solisitor again.
does the justice depend on wheatehr you have good lawyer or not there? woow that is scary
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what a mess. gawd, i am glad i never married..things SOME women do
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Sommerauer71: I am not in Australia, to make it clear, I live in Austria.
And I am talking about UK Family Law.
I can see that you are hurting, you are writing all what you have lived through... During this, but you now need to take this and turn it around.
I applaud that you do not discuss it in front of the children, however, if they ask questions then answer them...
Without prejudice.
I know the courts will do what is easiest, they do not like the difficult cases, so the difficult ones they make the decision that is easiest for them.
Were your children interviewed? By a guardian ad litem?
Did your lawyer, put forward your case in how you had supported, loved and cared for your children? There was a case, with two sides put across and the children's wishes would have been taken into consideration.
You are talking about the past and you need to look to the future now, it is done, fighting it in your own mind, is something that is wasted energy...
And I am talking about UK Family Law.
I can see that you are hurting, you are writing all what you have lived through... During this, but you now need to take this and turn it around.
I applaud that you do not discuss it in front of the children, however, if they ask questions then answer them...
Without prejudice.
I know the courts will do what is easiest, they do not like the difficult cases, so the difficult ones they make the decision that is easiest for them.
Were your children interviewed? By a guardian ad litem?
Did your lawyer, put forward your case in how you had supported, loved and cared for your children? There was a case, with two sides put across and the children's wishes would have been taken into consideration.
You are talking about the past and you need to look to the future now, it is done, fighting it in your own mind, is something that is wasted energy...
austria , australia ..UK ???
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I feel for this guy as I do all misunderstood Fathers but we must remember there are two sides to every story and I don't know the other so I can't judge one way or the other. I am a single father and it is very trying sometimes. I didn't have to go to court to gain custody because I made damn sure I married a woman who was compassionate and understanding. Me and my ex get along just fine, we have two boys together and they are at the age where they need their Dad. I was lucky enough to establish a relationship with my kids like a mother would while I was married. I have walked my kids to school every day since they started made their meals and made sure they are ready for school everday. When we got divorced my ex was overwhelmed by the amount of time and energy it takes to raise these boys by herself. Hell Laundry Grocery Shopping Doctors appointments school functions etc. She was more than willing to hand them over. For any guy that considers having custody of their kids, they should keep these things in mind. I hope all goes well for this guy and I suggest he use his time wisely as my ex did. She went back to school full time and is working on her master's degree and see's the kids on weekends and holidays luckily for me everything worked out fine. But Damn it get's hectic sometimes!
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jonahstrials: Raised my kids for 10yrs,then to suddenly lose custody of them. I don't even know where to start. My life has always been waiting for the 6days every other week I had them. How do you begin again?
Noone wins or loses- thats a stupid adult game - irrespective of this if the children are treated right by both of you - if one trys to act the "winner" then- they eventually lose --- love of the children is theirs to perceive and share--- and they know and remember--- a game with love never to be played
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javid1964: austria , australia ..UK ???
I live in Austria, I calrified that I do not live in Australia, to the OP.
And I know about the UK Family Law Courts, I went through it for years.
Hope that clarifies.
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CuspofMagic: Noone wins or loses- thats a stupid adult game - irrespective of this if the children are treated right by both of you - if one trys to act the "winner" then- they eventually lose --- love of the children is theirs to perceive and share--- and they know and remember--- a game with love never to be played
Exactly, Cuspy.
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Sommerauer71: Exactly, Cuspy.
aussie aussi aussie oi oi oi 
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CuspofMagic: aussie aussi aussie oi oi oi
Wot?
You left Yurope?
Without me?
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CuspofMagic: aussie aussi aussie oi oi oi
Wot?
You left Yurope?
Without me?
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Sommerauer71: Wot?
You left Yurope?
Without me?
You left Yurope?
Without me?
---the highway man will put the E back in the u
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Florida like Texas allows 12 yr olds to make the choice. In Texas if a 12 yr old signs an "Affidavit of Choice of Managing Conservator" then the judge has to articulate a really good reason to override it. An example would be duress or being paid to sign one. Did this occur in your case?
This isn't the place to get advice- as your time would be better spent reading the relevant sections of the Florida Family Code and its probably online.
IN Texas without an emergency you can file a Motion TO Modify after one year.
If you can show the law is I wrote in Paragraph 2 and the judge didnt follow it, that's good enough for a Motion for New Trial/and or appeal.
................
My divorces were friendly and we are good friends - I got the kids most of the time and my pet.. I know this will impress everyone Alex Possum ALL THE TIME!
LOL Good luck