Sit back ladies. Break out the popcorn and
soda, (or whatever you've been smoking,)
and contemplate this difinitive survey on
the insanity of men. Film at 11:00.
Are men really insane? Here are the results from the institute of 'What the freak was I thinking patholology.'
MEN!
1. Was your new CS date unable to come up
up with a viable passport proving you're
a legitimate member of the human species?
2. Did she have to sit on the couch watching you snivel like a whipped pup
because your favorite football team lost
the game?
3. Do you drink motor oil to prove you're
tough?
4. Does she get concerned when you wear your 44.magnum to church on Easter Sunday?
5. Did she become alarmed when she discovered
that there's no record of your existence?
6. Would she trust her children in the
presence of a man who still believes that
Elvis has been sighted on Mars?
7. Does her mother weep because her new
boy friend refuses to wear nothing but green socks?
8. Will her new boy friend summit to an
exorcism at the states expense?
9. When she says a word like 'sex,'to her
new CS date will you bring the car to a
screaching halt and strip naked on an
interstate highway?
10. Was she surprised when she came home
and found you wearing a pink dress simply
because you wanted to identify with Cinderella?
11. Does she fear that for some reason
Her new heart throb will eventually end
up in the witness protection program?
12. Did a red flag go up when she saw
You eat 63 hamburgers, 18 hotdogs, and
a warmed over reptile from the local zoo
at the family picknick?
13. Do you howl at the moon in some futile attempt to resurrect your inner
beast?
14. Does your mother wish she hand given
birth to a purple frog instead of you?
15. Have you told you how many people you
have buried in your basement?
16. Before you kissed her good night did
you require her to fill out a medical form
to verify that she wasn't suffering from
some mutant strain of leprosy?
17. Do animals laugh at you behind your back?
18. Do you have an inordinate affection
for eating all the photo's from the
album of your previous marriage?
19. Did she file a missing persons report
when you spent six days in the bathroom?
20. Did she ever wonder why 13 undercover
police vehicle's are always parked in your
driveway, and where you came up with the
$700,000 she found stuffed in your matress?
21. Does she get curious when every time she confronts you about
the 14 trash bags full of letters you've
received from the mental institution and
you keep in the shed?
There it is Ladies! If you can answer
yes to any of these questions then you've
got yourself a brand new boy friend! I'm
so happy for you. It doesn't get any better than this. Just email us. We've
got your man!
Cafe