Personal privacy or total openness in a committed relationship? (30)
NecaRob: Some people want their privacy while in a committed relationship. Some believe this can lead to lack of trust. Some want/need total openness between their partner and themselves. Please tell me what you prefer and I'd love to hear why. There are no right or wrong answers. Everyone is different. Thank you!
well before a relationship gets to the part of being "committed",Im sure that both partners will find what suits them ( this doesn`t apply if one of them happens to be stinking rich)...
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Boban1: well before a relationship gets to the part of being "committed",Im sure that both partners will find what suits them ( this doesn`t apply if one of them happens to be stinking rich)...
I would hope so! But alas, some people rush into a relationship before knowing if the person is fully compatible. I admit, I've actually done it. Live and learn.
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NecaRob: I would hope so! But alas, some people rush into a relationship before knowing if the person is fully compatible. I admit, I've actually done it. Live and learn.
Yep....lessons are there to be learnt and its shame on us if we dont!!!
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You are right, there are no "right" or "wrong" answers, I suppose the point is - how compatible those two are in their opinions...
For me it would be some tiny space of privacy, yes, and I do not mind if that other half has his one, too (of course, if its not something illegal, criminal, painful, etc;))
Golden midway, so to say.
Anyway, wish you good luck, and enjoy weekend!
For me it would be some tiny space of privacy, yes, and I do not mind if that other half has his one, too (of course, if its not something illegal, criminal, painful, etc;))
Golden midway, so to say.
Anyway, wish you good luck, and enjoy weekend!
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I've never locked my phone or had a password on my pc or emails, never check my pockets and worry whats in them, am not going to start either......
When it comes to whats in my head, its empty anyway
When it comes to whats in my head, its empty anyway
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hoolet: so if there is no openness and similarities..........what´s the point in getting started????
Through the openess the parts can discover the similarities.
just that sometimes happens to an invasion of thoughts...
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hoolet: so if there is no openness and similarities..........what´s the point in getting started????
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Some people only need a physical relationship, the similarity is irrelevant to them. in my case I choose to start at the beginning
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Personally, I am totally open to whoever I'm with. My lady is always welcome to be with me anytime, talk with any/all of my friends, read my email, view my phone, etc.... I do understand needing your space at times to just be alone with your thoughts or your friends. What would make me start to wonder would be if she was constantly texting or talking with someone else and not willing to even say who it is. If it's innocent, then what's the harm? No, I don't need to know every detail of the conversation. But I don't appreciate any secrets. I feel this way because I've been cheated on twice in this way while I was being the trusting man and giving her her privacy. So I hope I can find a lady who is willing to be open with me, as I will her.
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minnie50: Total openess is ideal, not forgetting that the parties must have their own spaces for their thoughts.
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NecaRob: Some people want their privacy while in a committed relationship. Some believe this can lead to lack of trust. Some want/need total openness between their partner and themselves. Please tell me what you prefer and I'd love to hear why. There are no right or wrong answers. Everyone is different. Thank you!
For a relationship to work there must be openedness, but you must also repect the other person's right to privacy... You need to able to communicate what is an acceptable boundary... but first you have to find out what is the no go zone - otherwise how do you that you are trespassing into their privacy...
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I have nothing to hide so total openness is more reasonable to me. It doesn´t mean that I will view his phone or emails. But as soon as I feel he´s hiding something from me, the trust begins to fade away.
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Mysticalli: I have nothing to hide so total openness is more reasonable to me. It doesn´t mean that I will view his phone or emails. But as soon as I feel he´s hiding something from me, the trust begins to fade away.
I am going to send you a resume if you dont mind..and some personal references..
;-}
xxxxx
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Nikogas: I am going to send you a resume if you dont mind..and some personal references..
;-}
xxxxx
;-}
xxxxx
no need that, Nikogas. ------ This poll is Archived ------
Mysticalli: no need that, Nikogas.
c'mon now.
you should have the cd in the mail overnight
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To my opinion total opennes is the best,but nothing to hide verges to impossibility. You hear people,telling their partner, after for decades living together. """Oh,i didn't know that,and always was under the impression,i knew everything about you."""
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NecaRob: I would hope so! But alas, some people rush into a relationship before knowing if the person is fully compatible. I admit, I've actually done it. Live and learn.
My own family chooses not to know MY truth so they will never know the true me.
They will never know the sister we once had because they are in denial.
If you want to know the truth let them speak freely and keep your mouth shut and your heart and mind pure.
Acceptance, forgiveness and love will provide you with commitment.
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for me the personal privacy and the let each other some space for fantasy to relax or totall freedom is always a pandora box the relationship to be destroyed.i have seen it to others i have seen to me.so i dont need more examples to see that this type of relationships are bad.there should be not totally freedom in a relationship in order the couple to protect each other.pandora box for people who dont know is from greek pyhtology.it ia a box who someone opened it because he had the freedom and choice to open it and they came out all the bad things of the word except hope.so you unterstand what i mean
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Mysticalli: I have nothing to hide so total openness is more reasonable to me. It doesn´t mean that I will view his phone or emails. But as soon as I feel he´s hiding something from me, the trust begins to fade away.
true.somehow like this my trust on my wife have gone in period of time even if she was not doing something bad
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totall openness is the best and never hide something from your partner,even if you have a problem,your partner should know in order to help you.hiding something and these stuff about privacy is totally destruction.i was multiple times shocked in my marriage when i was finding out things for my wife from others or bymyself and i was wondering all the time why she was hiding me these things.its totally terrible to hide things from your partner and to become the last person in the world to find out what your partner did or she or he is doing
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kaligulas: totall openness is the best and never hide something from your partner,even if you have a problem,your partner should know in order to help you.hiding something and these stuff about privacy is totally destruction.i was multiple times shocked in my marriage when i was finding out things for my wife from others or bymyself and i was wondering all the time why she was hiding me these things.its totally terrible to hide things from your partner and to become the last person in the world to find out what your partner did or she or he is doing
If it was in her past, what right do you have to know about it, some would say "none"...If you throw a tantrum the first time she relates something to you, she wont do it again. You acting all shocked would have warned her that you can't handle the truth..... that girl is a quick learner
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kaligulas: believe me her past always causing us problems to our present relationship.so you are worng.she was comparing me with exes.so i should i know about her past.you cant unterstand a person and make life with him or her better if you dont know and unterstand her or his past first.humans are not machines who delete mistakes from past and never repeat them again,they are humans who repeat the same and the same mistakes if they dont mention them and someone help them to overcome these mistakes
Ok let me read between the lines and fill in what you have ommited......Her past was a problem to "you" which manifested into a problem for her, that then yes would mean her past caused you both problems....
The problem though is, your constant needing to know, your constant wanting answers, your constant "I'm right your wrong", you have no right, if she wants you to know, she will tell you....
you reap what you sow...........
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kaligulas: believe me her past always causing us problems to our present relationship.so you are worng.she was comparing me with exes.so i should i know about her past.you cant unterstand a person and make life with him or her better if you dont know and unterstand her or his past first.humans are not machines who delete mistakes from past and never repeat them again,they are humans who repeat the same and the same mistakes if they dont mention them and someone help them to overcome these mistakes
Hang on a minute - Her past is her past, not your's - ask yourself why are finding out things from other people - why she not talking to you - maybe because your a being too hypercritical, too judgmental, too controlling - give her breathing space - when she wants to tell you something - listen - but for heavens sake let her live and deal with her past - her way!!!!
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bubbles2012: Hang on a minute - Her past is her past, not your's - ask yourself why are finding out things from other people - why she not talking to you - maybe because your a being too hypercritical, too judgmental, too controlling - give her breathing space - when she wants to tell you something - listen - but for heavens sake let her live and deal with her past - her way!!!!
very intuitive------ This poll is Archived ------
kaligulas: of coruse i would tell everything bad i did.she knows everything bad i have done all my life.whenever she asks me something i sit and talk with her everything to destroy every question in her mind cause if i dont problems will arise
the problem is that she is not honest with me as i am honest with her.and in every relationship if one doesnt talk about past have secrets and is not honest this relationship si doomed
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kaligulas: the problem is that she is not honest with me as i am honest with her.and in every relationship if one doesnt talk about past have secrets and is not honest this relationship si doomed
Has she murdered anyone...........has she kissed the pope??? ASK..........and if you don´t get answers......then you should start to worry. Get my drift????
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NecaRob: Some people want their privacy while in a committed relationship. Some believe this can lead to lack of trust. Some want/need total openness between their partner and themselves. Please tell me what you prefer and I'd love to hear why. There are no right or wrong answers. Everyone is different. Thank you!
Thats rich!!!! So if no one agrees with your point on long term relationships they are then doomed to fail??? and this coming from the same person who has no trust what-so-ever in his own partner!!!
You are not even in a "loving, trusting" relationship yourself so how the hell can you say that about others?
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OOPS...that last comment was for kaligus
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almera03: Ok let me read between the lines and fill in what you have ommited......
Her past was a problem to "you" which manifested into a problem for her, that then yes would mean her past caused you both problems....
The problem though is, your constant needing to know, your constant wanting answers, your constant "I'm right your wrong", you have no right, if she wants you to know, she will tell you....you reap what you sow...........
Her past was a problem to "you" which manifested into a problem for her, that then yes would mean her past caused you both problems....
The problem though is, your constant needing to know, your constant wanting answers, your constant "I'm right your wrong", you have no right, if she wants you to know, she will tell you....you reap what you sow...........
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almera03: If it was in her past, what right do you have to know about it, some would say "none"...
If you throw a tantrum the first time she relates something to you, she wont do it again. You acting all shocked would have warned her that you can't handle the truth..... that girl is a quick learner
If you throw a tantrum the first time she relates something to you, she wont do it again. You acting all shocked would have warned her that you can't handle the truth..... that girl is a quick learner
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86 Votes
3,451 Views
30 Comments
Created: May 2012
Last Viewed: Apr 20
Last Commented: Jun 2012
Last Voted: Jul 2017
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Personal privacy or total openness in a committed relationship?(Vote Below)