Does separated mean still married? Or do most people realize it takes 4 years to get a divorce in Ir (59)
WittyandWise: You just go back to using it, first place you change it is the doctors etc, you have your birth cert as proof. I am not saying it is straight forward everywhere but bottom line is you are not legally your married name and thus can revert back and its legal, and this is your stance when arguing with twats who don't know it. lol I had problem getting my driving license changed.
Thanks WittyandWise. Long as I get it changed on my passport I can't see anything else being a problem. I only put it off this long cos of paperwork I thought I'd need.
Thanks too Glatlol.
Glatlol: lol who pissed on your cornflakes
probably you id say 
mjpd67: probably you id say
Nah not into the golden showers thing, well not on cereal anyway
Glatlol: Nah not into the golden showers thing, well not on cereal anyway
your aquatic antics dont concern me 
Glatlol: Honestly you dont, your maiden name is your birth name and you can use it as you want, I did.
Me too.
MermaidDreams: Thanks WittyandWise. Long as I get it changed on my passport I can't see anything else being a problem. I only put it off this long cos of paperwork I thought I'd need.
Thanks too Glatlol.
Thanks too Glatlol.
My problem was my license.
My only concern was my kids so I talked to two older kids first, ask how they would feel and then give them 6 months to get used to the idea, when I then checked back with them, well are you ok if I revert back to my own name now, they said, thought you already had
Did the same when I ask them would they be ok with me filing for divorce.
Of course I did not do this as soon as we split up, give them time to adjust to the changes in their lives first.
Underestimated my youngest and just thought no point telling her yet, I will just use my married name in her school, but one day I signed her homework and she said but that's not your name any more, she heard me on the phone and was totally fine with it
good luck
It's a great feeling when all is done and dusted
WittyandWise: My problem was my license.
My only concern was my kids so I talked to two older kids first, ask how they would feel and then give them 6 months to get used to the idea, when I then checked back with them, well are you ok if I revert back to my own name now, they said, thought you already had
Did the same when I ask them would they be ok with me filing for divorce.
Of course I did not do this as soon as we split up, give them time to adjust to the changes in their lives first.
Underestimated my youngest and just thought no point telling her yet, I will just use my married name in her school, but one day I signed her homework and she said but that's not your name any more, she heard me on the phone and was totally fine with it
good luck
It's a great feeling when all is done and dusted
My only concern was my kids so I talked to two older kids first, ask how they would feel and then give them 6 months to get used to the idea, when I then checked back with them, well are you ok if I revert back to my own name now, they said, thought you already had
Did the same when I ask them would they be ok with me filing for divorce.
Of course I did not do this as soon as we split up, give them time to adjust to the changes in their lives first.
Underestimated my youngest and just thought no point telling her yet, I will just use my married name in her school, but one day I signed her homework and she said but that's not your name any more, she heard me on the phone and was totally fine with it
good luck
It's a great feeling when all is done and dusted
It's gone 3 years now and kids know eventually divorce is where we're headed, it's just a matter of time. Thanks, I'll be relieved alright.
MermaidDreams: It's gone 3 years now and kids know eventually divorce is where we're headed, it's just a matter of time. Thanks, I'll be relieved alright.
Ah jesus well time to change your name while waiting on divorce.
mjpd67: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwBirf4BWew
dateadave: Just so I'm clear here.
I'm talking about a marriage that is over, has been over for some time and both parties have been living apart for at least a year, have had no intimacy over that period and no desire to do so or to get back together.
Of course in Ireland it takes 4 years of living apart to get a divorce so...
Do you consider someone in these circumstances to still be married and would it put you off meeting them?
Do you think that it is likely that someone who sets their marital status as separated to be not over their ex?
Or is it acceptable to lie about this on your profile as long as you own up to it before meeting?
(personally I think honesty is best but I realize sometimes people might be uncomfortable sharing info with everyone out there)
I'm separated but I still consider myself married cause I am. I put separated on my profile so people know I'm married but not with the other person. Although I will admit I think its harder for a separated guy to meet a woman. JMO.I'm talking about a marriage that is over, has been over for some time and both parties have been living apart for at least a year, have had no intimacy over that period and no desire to do so or to get back together.
Of course in Ireland it takes 4 years of living apart to get a divorce so...
Do you consider someone in these circumstances to still be married and would it put you off meeting them?
Do you think that it is likely that someone who sets their marital status as separated to be not over their ex?
Or is it acceptable to lie about this on your profile as long as you own up to it before meeting?
(personally I think honesty is best but I realize sometimes people might be uncomfortable sharing info with everyone out there)
Maverick147: I'm separated but I still consider myself married cause I am. I put separated on my profile so people know I'm married but not with the other person. Although I will admit I think its harder for a separated guy to meet a woman. JMO.
in the same boat as yourself and agree 
mjpd67: in the same boat as yourself and agree
Well then chat to ladies that are in the same position as you, stop playing hard to get
emerald888: Well then chat to ladies that are in the same position as you, stop playing hard to get
Will ya stop pic up not in hiding or anything id have a better chance negotiating with a terrorist than chatting some of the women on here 
Maverick147: I'm separated but I still consider myself married cause I am. I put separated on my profile so people know I'm married but not with the other person. Although I will admit I think its harder for a separated guy to meet a woman. JMO.
Thats the line that would ring alarm bells with me and make me think a guy wasnt ready to date.
emerald888: Well then chat to ladies that are in the same position as you, stop playing hard to get
im not playing hard to get, i wanna play to get me hard 
mjpd67: im not playing hard to get, i wanna play to get me hard
I am married though. I can't change that...yet.... Am I supposed to pretend to someone that I'm single. I've dated people who "I would say" didn't like the fact I have kids. Should I lie about that. The fact is I am married. Do we get on... Yeh very well. Will we ever get back together... No. I can say that with certainty. But I can't change people's apprehensions. Ah well... Consigned to the scrap heap I guess 
dateadave: Just so I'm clear here.
I'm talking about a marriage that is over, has been over for some time and both parties have been living apart for at least a year, have had no intimacy over that period and no desire to do so or to get back together.
Of course in Ireland it takes 4 years of living apart to get a divorce so...
Do you consider someone in these circumstances to still be married and would it put you off meeting them?
Do you think that it is likely that someone who sets their marital status as separated to be not over their ex?
Or is it acceptable to lie about this on your profile as long as you own up to it before meeting?
(personally I think honesty is best but I realize sometimes people might be uncomfortable sharing info with everyone out there)
I'm talking about a marriage that is over, has been over for some time and both parties have been living apart for at least a year, have had no intimacy over that period and no desire to do so or to get back together.
Of course in Ireland it takes 4 years of living apart to get a divorce so...
Do you consider someone in these circumstances to still be married and would it put you off meeting them?
Do you think that it is likely that someone who sets their marital status as separated to be not over their ex?
Or is it acceptable to lie about this on your profile as long as you own up to it before meeting?
(personally I think honesty is best but I realize sometimes people might be uncomfortable sharing info with everyone out there)
Both parties just have to agree they have been separated for 5 years don't they?
You can just say you were sleeping in separate rooms for the past 5 years and that will do. So most people don't actually wait the full 5 years now.
fifitheminx: yo date a dave....separated people arent still into their ex if they are on a dating site .
Yeah he gets that bit...
I suspect our friend here, datedave has probably got a bit of flak and frustration when women turned their nose up at the whole 'separated' thing, and then he has decided to make this thread. That's what I think. It's a rhetorical sort of thing.
MADDOG69: Yeah he gets that bit...
I suspect our friend here, datedave has probably got a bit of flak and frustration when women turned their nose up at the whole 'separated' thing, and then he has decided to make this thread. That's what I think. It's a rhetorical sort of thing.
I suspect our friend here, datedave has probably got a bit of flak and frustration when women turned their nose up at the whole 'separated' thing, and then he has decided to make this thread. That's what I think. It's a rhetorical sort of thing.
lol ive a habit of answering rhetorical dont i?
seriously u would be so much better use in some agency solving murders u know that
fifitheminx: lol ive a habit of answering rhetorical dont i?
seriously u would be so much better use in some agency solving murders u know that
seriously u would be so much better use in some agency solving murders u know that
Here's the long answer though... and we had these thread before.... it can be a block to moving ahead fast and getting married from the other person's side.
When you start out with someone they might then decide not to proceed with a divorce for a number of reasons... leaving the new partner in the lurch. Also... and very importantly too... women still want that white dress day in Maas for Aunty Bridie remember? When they see a fella that might have been married before, they think, 'No White dress in Church waaaaahaaaaa
' unless of course separated people go for an annulment... and as we already discussed, they rarely do.That's the problem.
MADDOG69: Here's the long answer though... and we had these thread before.... it can be a block to moving ahead fast and getting married from the other person's side.
When you start out with someone they might then decide not to proceed with a divorce for a number of reasons... leaving the new partner in the lurch. Also... and very importantly too... women still want that white dress day in Maas for Aunty Bridie remember? When they see a fella that might have been married before, they think, 'No White dress in Church waaaaahaaaaa ' unless of course separated people go for an annulment... and as we already discussed, they rarely do.That's the problem.
When you start out with someone they might then decide not to proceed with a divorce for a number of reasons... leaving the new partner in the lurch. Also... and very importantly too... women still want that white dress day in Maas for Aunty Bridie remember? When they see a fella that might have been married before, they think, 'No White dress in Church waaaaahaaaaa ' unless of course separated people go for an annulment... and as we already discussed, they rarely do.That's the problem.
thats where i was coming from..with my last paragraph
separated as an option is there to inform the people looking at ur profile..i have an ex i was married to and we (if kids are ticked off the list also) might even have some contact too, i may not be into remarriage and blah...all the things that tells us.
so people know from the offset.
singles might have a problem with this..if they wanna get married..or have some guys first child, or simply hate the hassle an ex can often bring...so yeah your ex is a big part...divorced or separated ...
so yeah dave...pick the separated or divorced or not interested in marriage types who are all very non problematic with regards to your ex and kids being in touch and tadaaaaaaa ...ur in business.
Glatlol: Thats the line that would ring alarm bells with me and make me think a guy wasnt ready to date.
my last msg was for you d'ohMaverick147: my last msg was for you d'oh
I figured that.
Didnt say anyone should pretend to be single if they werent. IMO if you consider yourself married then you are not ready to be in a relationship, as I said is simply my opinion. I would never have said I was married once my ex and I seperated.
I have dated a seperated guy and if it's over a couple of years and people have moved on, I have no problems with it.
I have had coffee dates with guys who weren't exactly upfront with how long they are seperated - if it's fairly fresh you have a whole lot of baggage to deal with - sorry, but no thanks.
From a certain age on, I actually wouldn't date guys who were never married, but then I have no interest in the white wedding thing.
I have had coffee dates with guys who weren't exactly upfront with how long they are seperated - if it's fairly fresh you have a whole lot of baggage to deal with - sorry, but no thanks.
From a certain age on, I actually wouldn't date guys who were never married, but then I have no interest in the white wedding thing.
Glatlol: I figured that.Didnt say anyone should pretend to be single if they werent. IMO if you consider yourself married then you are not ready to be in a relationship, as I said is simply my opinion. I would never have said I was married once my ex and I seperated.
I understand where your coming from but I'm 100% sure I'm ready to date. I'm separated. But I am married. Ah well :-)More Threads
your personality
wanting beyond need
More Proof The GOP is a Criminal Organization
Ladies
The Best of the GOP
Unions support Democrats!
men's perspective towards women
Karen McDougal - Playmate Model will testify in Hush Money Trial
Sleepy Don!
other can see but not you
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
Believe me if we had lived together any longer we would have probably wound up poisoning each others wine!