Do LD Relationships work? I know this poll has been posted many times....so don´t beef at me..... (80)
I have had a few LDR's and found that if two people take time to get to know each other, prior to any meet, we have always been very comfortable when we did finally meet, I have only had LDR's in my own country, never abraod, that may have it's own complications. I know a couple who did meet online from two different countries, it worked out so well, they finally married and now live in Texas USA and seem to be madly in love with each other and stay in touch with friends they met from the net.
It's rare to find love that leads to marriage, whether they live next door or across the country. I think when two people are honest and open, anything is possible. Here in America, I live in the middle of the states, a flight to either coast is only 2 1/2 hours away either way. For the right person I have no problem with that.
There are risks in any way of dating, the inter net, has many success stories, that are rarely told, we usually only here of the horror stories. But like Big John said, I too have met some very wonderful women, we just weren't that perfect match, but then again, I've dated locally and found the same thing to be true. It's a matter perspective and how you view or want things. I understand the seeing each other regularly, it makes sense and adds to the realness of it. But LDR's can work, Good Luck to you in yours...
It's rare to find love that leads to marriage, whether they live next door or across the country. I think when two people are honest and open, anything is possible. Here in America, I live in the middle of the states, a flight to either coast is only 2 1/2 hours away either way. For the right person I have no problem with that.
There are risks in any way of dating, the inter net, has many success stories, that are rarely told, we usually only here of the horror stories. But like Big John said, I too have met some very wonderful women, we just weren't that perfect match, but then again, I've dated locally and found the same thing to be true. It's a matter perspective and how you view or want things. I understand the seeing each other regularly, it makes sense and adds to the realness of it. But LDR's can work, Good Luck to you in yours...
langleygirl: I think some relationships actually last longer because of the distance ie. spouse working out of town for periods of time ....... honestly for me, that's not what I'd desire in a relationship. I'd want a partner who was around more.
This is very tough on the children if there are any. When I was young, my father would work in Africa. He would be gone for quite a long time.
Ambrose2007: Oh my god - not again!
Yes, they can work for awhile - that is, they can work well enough for people to fall in love and decide they want permanent relationship. However, virtually all LDRs are transitory; they don't work indefinitely, in other words.
Yes, they can work for awhile - that is, they can work well enough for people to fall in love and decide they want permanent relationship. However, virtually all LDRs are transitory; they don't work indefinitely, in other words.
oh whats wrong with YOU?!
bob1959: Well fawn-I've just been splitting some kindling wood and...well I'm a real dreamboat for you until I shower!
Now that could go either way until I smell your scent , either it's ewwww stinky or owwwwww Yummmmmm 
cgedvr: Your smokin hot pic has got me all sweaty....ohhh and that smell....me fartin
Ohhhh you look Hotttt, but I have met hotttt before and they aren't always up to my animalistic simple scent needs....
Pocoloco44: It's rare to find love that leads to marriage, whether they live next door or across the country..
I think Pocoloco has it right there.. it is a rare find, true love! We can look right under our noses or on the other side of the globe..if we are lucky and find it, where-ever it is, we should go for it! Of course, the reality of that is, sometimes that 'find' is but a mere illusion. For me, I would love to meet someone not from my island.. who I can fall in love with and hopefully get married, and for sure I'd relocate..
If you believe you have found it, then girl, go for it!
Catsy: I´ve been comunicating on a Daily basis with somebody i have finally fallen for...i believe he has too...
Distance....could be a problem, although we are both living in Countries we were´nt even Born in......
More....yes I have lots more, but don´t want to make a Book out of a Poll!!!!!!
Distance....could be a problem, although we are both living in Countries we were´nt even Born in......
More....yes I have lots more, but don´t want to make a Book out of a Poll!!!!!!
Actually that's what I prefer - a LDR. Start that way, eventually get together and move in with him wherever he is. I don't want anyone next door. I came to Canada from Europe and want to go back there, so wouldn't mind joining someone there.
mindfful: oh whats wrong with YOU?!
Why do you think something's wrong?
Big_John: Yes I know and have heard of several success stories where two have made it work. I believe it takes a special type of person to generate positive results via a LDR. I don't believe I have what it takes.
I have given up on finding someone on this Forums Threads where the whole world joins in. I guess I have accepted that I am here to read and post. When I first joined I did travel long distances to meet wonderful ladies. I met several outstanding ones, just not the one for me to spend the rest of my life.
I don't know how to make a LDR work. Others do--I don't! We each have our skills and abilities and we each have our limitations. This one is mine.
I have given up on finding someone on this Forums Threads where the whole world joins in. I guess I have accepted that I am here to read and post. When I first joined I did travel long distances to meet wonderful ladies. I met several outstanding ones, just not the one for me to spend the rest of my life.
I don't know how to make a LDR work. Others do--I don't! We each have our skills and abilities and we each have our limitations. This one is mine.
Well, I think a key factor in making one work is to know your "end game." Are you willing to move, to make major changes in your life? If not, you shouldn't be in the LDR game. I mean that *anyone* who is not prepared and willing to uproot themselves shouldn't enter into an LDR (unless they're looking for penpals
)I'm saying that if you are unwilling to move, you probably won't be able to make an LDR work, because, as I mentioned previously, an LDR is a means to an end - a transitory affair, as it were - and that "end" is being together. For that to happen *someone* has to be willing to uproot.
Other than, some patience is called for as you work things out in a more problematic setting than normal couples worth within. You need to be comfortable with communication, and able to handle loneliness (not being able to see your love as often as if she or he lived next door).
Ambrose2007: Well, I think a key factor in making one work is to know your "end game." Are you willing to move, to make major changes in your life? If not, you shouldn't be in the LDR game. I mean that *anyone* who is not prepared and willing to uproot themselves shouldn't enter into an LDR (unless they're looking for penpals)
I'm saying that if you are unwilling to move, you probably won't be able to make an LDR work, because, as I mentioned previously, an LDR is a means to an end - a transitory affair, as it were - and that "end" is being together. For that to happen *someone* has to be willing to uproot.
Other than, some patience is called for as you work things out in a more problematic setting than normal couples experienceworth within. You need to be comfortable with communication, and able to handle loneliness (not being able to see your love as often as if she or he lived next door).
I'm saying that if you are unwilling to move, you probably won't be able to make an LDR work, because, as I mentioned previously, an LDR is a means to an end - a transitory affair, as it were - and that "end" is being together. For that to happen *someone* has to be willing to uproot.
Other than, some patience is called for as you work things out in a more problematic setting than normal couples experience
By "comfortable with communication," read: You must like to talk a lot. If you don't enjoy getting to know someone by phone and email, you aren't a candidate for an LDR.
Ambrose2007: I'm amazed that I actually agree with you. Very few people can tolerate months without physical contact on a regular basis. Nor should they.
A successful LDR has to involve fairly frequent "conjugal visits," in my view, to have a change of surviving. In the initial phase, as you get to know each other, perhaps a month or two might be okay. However, it is a VERY good idea to meet in person asap. For most people, questions of physical chemistry won't be answered until that happens, and the answer may render all the build-up conversations painfully moot.
A successful LDR has to involve fairly frequent "conjugal visits," in my view, to have a change of surviving. In the initial phase, as you get to know each other, perhaps a month or two might be okay. However, it is a VERY good idea to meet in person asap. For most people, questions of physical chemistry won't be answered until that happens, and the answer may render all the build-up conversations painfully moot.
I agree with both you and Seek+Destroy... I could not cope without the physical contact...
Ambrose2007: I'm amazed that I actually agree with you. Very few people can tolerate months without physical contact on a regular basis. Nor should they.
A successful LDR has to involve fairly frequent "conjugal visits," in my view, to have a change of surviving. In the initial phase, as you get to know each other, perhaps a month or two might be okay. However, it is a VERY good idea to meet in person asap. For most people, questions of physical chemistry won't be answered until that happens, and the answer may render all the build-up conversations painfully moot.
A successful LDR has to involve fairly frequent "conjugal visits," in my view, to have a change of surviving. In the initial phase, as you get to know each other, perhaps a month or two might be okay. However, it is a VERY good idea to meet in person asap. For most people, questions of physical chemistry won't be answered until that happens, and the answer may render all the build-up conversations painfully moot.
yeah im amazed too that ANYONE agrees with me !!!!
are you feeling ok???? i hope this is not the start of a trend !!!
xxfrecklesxx: I agree with both you and Seek+Destroy... I could not cope without the physical contact...
k... yall need to stop this....
the last thing we need up in here is me starting to think that i ACTUALLY know what im talking about...... !!!!!
the ego boost could be devastating to the CS community !!!
StressFree: They can definitely work if you are willing to go through it. I say go for it Catsy!
ditto Ambrose2007: I'm amazed that I actually agree with you. Very few people can tolerate months without physical contact on a regular basis. Nor should they.
A successful LDR has to involve fairly frequent "conjugal visits," in my view, to have a change of surviving. In the initial phase, as you get to know each other, perhaps a month or two might be okay. However, it is a VERY good idea to meet in person asap. For most people, questions of physical chemistry won't be answered until that happens, and the answer may render all the build-up conversations painfully moot.
A successful LDR has to involve fairly frequent "conjugal visits," in my view, to have a change of surviving. In the initial phase, as you get to know each other, perhaps a month or two might be okay. However, it is a VERY good idea to meet in person asap. For most people, questions of physical chemistry won't be answered until that happens, and the answer may render all the build-up conversations painfully moot.
Having the ability to meet on a regular basic is important. Knowing that one or the other one will move soon is vital. Seeing the person and physical contact is so important. Yes a LDR can work, but only with two people who are very secure in themselves and totally trust the other.
Big_John: Having the ability to meet on a regular basic is important. Knowing that one or the other one will move soon is vital. Seeing the person and physical contact is so important. Yes a LDR can work, but only with two people who are very secure in themselves and totally trust the other.
What he said!
Ambrose2007: By "comfortable with communication," read: You must like to talk a lot. If you don't enjoy getting to know someone by phone and email, you aren't a candidate for an LDR.
I have to agree with this also.
... oh and at the lack of that... there is also the amusement of watching yall get bent out of shape after my comments !!!!!
Yes we can all see that. Obviously.as a child the only way you could get any attention from your parents was to do something bad.
I feel sorry for you, and I hope your therapy is successful.
Yes we can all see that. Obviously.as a child the only way you could get any attention from your parents was to do something bad.
I feel sorry for you, and I hope your therapy is successful.
Catsy: I´ve been comunicating on a Daily basis with somebody i have finally fallen for...i believe he has too...
Distance....could be a problem, although we are both living in Countries we were´nt even Born in......
More....yes I have lots more, but don´t want to make a Book out of a Poll!!!!!!
Distance....could be a problem, although we are both living in Countries we were´nt even Born in......
More....yes I have lots more, but don´t want to make a Book out of a Poll!!!!!!
Seems your heart has already told you to take the chance for this LDR, go with it...if you don't, you'll always regret not giving it a chance
A LDR marriage would be another consideration totally different
Good Luck in Love and Longivity with your new found Love
EA
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Plus, not only myself but you and I both know of Success Stories on this Site, so, why are we on it only for the Forums?
Maybe?....
Thank You all the same
Yes I know and have heard of several success stories where two have made it work. I believe it takes a special type of person to generate positive results via a LDR. I don't believe I have what it takes.
I have given up on finding someone on this Forums Threads where the whole world joins in. I guess I have accepted that I am here to read and post. When I first joined I did travel long distances to meet wonderful ladies. I met several outstanding ones, just not the one for me to spend the rest of my life.
I don't know how to make a LDR work. Others do--I don't! We each have our skills and abilities and we each have our limitations. This one is mine.