Why Is on Line Dating so Hard? (179)
Prettyuptowngirl: Well Equiya, I'll let you into a secret. Im South African, born and bred, and Im indian, and as such in South Africa, I'm classified black So I'm as "BLACK" as you want me to be
oh really? ok, thanks
blacker than the scammer? no, maybe she is a South African white, who knows, LIES, LIES, LIES
I am very Black but not with blonde hair, my parents are African
Let's sing James Brown here:
say it loud - I'M BLACK AND PROUD
demonfairy: Some people seem to find love on line,others are not so lucky.Lets be honest it is not as easy as it sounds to find a partner.Is it because we ask questions on line that would take us months to ask in real life, because we learn more about the person behind the face... What do you think?
I've pretty much given up on it. Some days think I'm just getting way too old for this.
demonfairy: It does seem like the ones i am attracted to always live far a way..
seems that way to me also
Me too....sigh 
lifeatthebeach: seems that way to me also
demonfairy: Some people seem to find love on line,others are not so lucky.Lets be honest it is not as easy as it sounds to find a partner.Is it because we ask questions on line that would take us months to ask in real life, because we learn more about the person behind the face... What do you think?
Because it is a cattle market. People are coming on line primarily to look for a bargain rather than love. Online dating is similar to an auction. The man or woman first starts eliminating potential partners based on height, weight, colour etc. without even getting a chance to know them because there are too many to converse with. In addition, an online dater thinks that the grass is always greener on the other side. As a result, when they go on dates, they don't make much effort to bond with their date. Instead they focus on looking for fault's in that partner so that they can quickly jump to the next date.
venusenvy: Me too....sigh
Will start working on that
Zackman: Because it is a cattle market. People are coming on line primarily to look for a bargain rather than love. Online dating is similar to an auction. The man or woman first starts eliminating potential partners based on height, weight, colour etc. without even getting a chance to know them because there are too many to converse with. In addition, an online dater thinks that the grass is always greener on the other side. As a result, when they go on dates, they don't make much effort to bond with their date. Instead they focus on looking for fault's in that partner so that they can quickly jump to the next date.
This coming from an "expert" in dating 16-21 yr olds
Who the heck is the scheming entity that purposely put our perfect mates out of reasonable reach anyway 
2intrigued: Who the heck is the scheming entity that purposely put our perfect mates out of reasonable reach anyway
If you feel that far away love is worth over coming the distance and think you want that person you will do what it takes to have that person
cincity: distance first then honesty...so many people tell little lies that it is hard to figure out who is actually telling the truth on here...
Yep,I would agree! I'm kind of enjoying the forums and do chat to a few people I like via email. I thought the chances of meeting were slim, but interestingly enough, there are two fellas who have contacted me very recently - one who is here on holiday and wants to meet up for coffee, and another Irishman who is coming out here to live and wants to meet up! So, we shall see.... You never know what's waiting around the corner...
lifeatthebeach: If you feel that far away love is worth over coming the distance and think you want that person you will do what it takes to have that person
I would have to beg, borrow or steal to get to them and imagine the disappointment after having done so to find out they really aren't who they say they are
Zackman: Because it is a cattle market. People are coming on line primarily to look for a bargain rather than love. Online dating is similar to an auction. The man or woman first starts eliminating potential partners based on height, weight, colour etc. without even getting a chance to know them because there are too many to converse with. In addition, an online dater thinks that the grass is always greener on the other side. As a result, when they go on dates, they don't make much effort to bond with their date. Instead they focus on looking for fault's in that partner so that they can quickly jump to the next date.
I do agree with your statement
leostartingover: Yep,I would agree! I'm kind of enjoying the forums and do chat to a few people I like via email. I thought the chances of meeting were slim, but interestingly enough, there are two fellas who have contacted me very recently - one who is here on holiday and wants to meet up for coffee, and another Irishman who is coming out here to live and wants to meet up! So, we shall see.... You never know what's waiting around the corner...
Good luck,with your dates...who knows just maybe one of then could be mr.right 
2intrigued: I would have to beg, borrow or steal to get to them and imagine the disappointment after having done so to find out they really aren't who they say they are
Yes, it is bad enough on LOCAL dating sites when that happens... and it has happened to me not just once but a few times! I've had guys lie about their height, their size, their marital status... I have now given up on local dating sites as a result... I tried speed dating and that was not my thing. Have a couple of friends who want me to try dinner dating with them, and that could be fun! The difficult thing about being single at this age is that most of my friends are married and although I see them on their own, they don't invite me around for dinner anymore!!! So, it simply isn't easy to meet good people...
leostartingover: Yes, it is bad enough on LOCAL dating sites when that happens... and it has happened to me not just once but a few times! I've had guys lie about their height, their size, their marital status... I have now given up on local dating sites as a result... I tried speed dating and that was not my thing. Have a couple of friends who want me to try dinner dating with them, and that could be fun! The difficult thing about being single at this age is that most of my friends are married and although I see them on their own, they don't invite me around for dinner anymore!!! So, it simply isn't easy to meet good people...
I'm on a local dating site as well and have to agree with you on the lies and complexities of it....and imo, it's even more complicated on an international dating site
2intrigued: I would have to beg, borrow or steal to get to them and imagine the disappointment after having done so to find out they really aren't who they say they are
Thats why you take your time getting to know the person and not allow being rushed. If its meet to be, take your time to find out and see
demonfairy: Good luck,with your dates...who knows just maybe one of then could be mr.right
Hiya DF... Well you never know!
leostartingover: Yes, it is bad enough on LOCAL dating sites when that happens... and it has happened to me not just once but a few times! I've had guys lie about their height, their size, their marital status... I have now given up on local dating sites as a result... I tried speed dating and that was not my thing. Have a couple of friends who want me to try dinner dating with them, and that could be fun! The difficult thing about being single at this age is that most of my friends are married and although I see them on their own, they don't invite me around for dinner anymore!!! So, it simply isn't easy to meet good people...
Have you noticed on the local sites,that you e-mail back and forth,then when it gets close to time to meet each other you don't hear from them any more..when they do that i get the feeling that they weren't truefullifeatthebeach: Thats why you take your time getting to know the person and not allow being rushed. If its meet to be, take your time to find out and see
Been there and done that with a man from Michigan....all set to give it a go and then he gets a job promotion and hooks up with a lady at his workplace....fate is not always in favor
Nothing is ever guaranteed just can roll the dice and hope for the best
It is not easy to find a partner as we get older and our experiences help us to define what we would like but if we are looking for someone to "complete ourselves" we will never find that partner.
If we enter the online dating scene with the expectation that we will find that certain someone to spend the rest of lives with, then we are setting ourselves up for disappointment. If we go into it with the thought that we are going to meet people, make some friends and learn new things about ourselves and others, then if we do find that certain someone to enhance our lives, we are richer for it. If not, then we have made some lasting friendships and learned what to watch out for. JMO
If we enter the online dating scene with the expectation that we will find that certain someone to spend the rest of lives with, then we are setting ourselves up for disappointment. If we go into it with the thought that we are going to meet people, make some friends and learn new things about ourselves and others, then if we do find that certain someone to enhance our lives, we are richer for it. If not, then we have made some lasting friendships and learned what to watch out for. JMO
lifeatthebeach: Thats why you take your time getting to know the person and not allow being rushed. If its meet to be, take your time to find out and see
I chatted with this great guy and time just went flying out the freaking window It was like a roller coaster of emotions and heart stopping words
I know I should have given myself more TIME
Time is our friend
Time is my friend
Time is a life saver a preserver of your heart
I have learn a great lesson all over again
TIME will bring all of what is and what is not to the surface
just be willing to wait it out
mmichaelm: I've pretty much given up on it. Some days think I'm just getting way too old for this.
I think we all feel that way some times,just keep your chin up.. It's definitely a distance issue. When you connect with someone that you could have a positive outcome with and they are thousands of miles away it is difficult for some. I know people will say that you can deal with that aspect by traveling, but it's not always that easy as some people have jobs, properties, businesses, children,and other obligations in their lives and cannot jump on a plane anytime it strikes their mood.
Zackman: Because it is a cattle market. People are coming on line primarily to look for a bargain rather than love. Online dating is similar to an auction. The man or woman first starts eliminating potential partners based on height, weight, colour etc. without even getting a chance to know them because there are too many to converse with. In addition, an online dater thinks that the grass is always greener on the other side. As a result, when they go on dates, they don't make much effort to bond with their date. Instead they focus on looking for fault's in that partner so that they can quickly jump to the next date.
demonfairy: I think we all feel that way some times,just keep your chin up..
Hi D/F .its not my chin i,m worried about........
Zackman: Because it is a cattle market. People are coming on line primarily to look for a bargain rather than love. Online dating is similar to an auction. The man or woman first starts eliminating potential partners based on height, weight, colour etc. without even getting a chance to know them because there are too many to converse with. In addition, an online dater thinks that the grass is always greener on the other side. As a result, when they go on dates, they don't make much effort to bond with their date. Instead they focus on looking for fault's in that partner so that they can quickly jump to the next date.
That's right agree with Zackman too many to choose from, they don't realize that and the end they get nothing.amahlala: It is not easy to find a partner as we get older and our experiences help us to define what we would like but if we are looking for someone to "complete ourselves" we will never find that partner.
If we enter the online dating scene with the expectation that we will find that certain someone to spend the rest of lives with, then we are setting ourselves up for disappointment. If we go into it with the thought that we are going to meet people, make some friends and learn new things about ourselves and others, then if we do find that certain someone to enhance our lives, we are richer for it. If not, then we have made some lasting friendships and learned what to watch out for. JMO
If we enter the online dating scene with the expectation that we will find that certain someone to spend the rest of lives with, then we are setting ourselves up for disappointment. If we go into it with the thought that we are going to meet people, make some friends and learn new things about ourselves and others, then if we do find that certain someone to enhance our lives, we are richer for it. If not, then we have made some lasting friendships and learned what to watch out for. JMO
so true
fasterthanthem5: It's definitely a distance issue. When you connect with someone that you could have a positive outcome with and they are thousands of miles away it is difficult for some. I know people will say that you can deal with that aspect by traveling, but it's not always that easy as some people have jobs, properties, businesses, children,and other obligations in their lives and cannot jump on a plane anytime it strikes their mood.
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And if you look at his profile it gets even funnier!
This is my favorite quote from his profile:
I came across your profile which I personally find interesting and charming and decided to drop you few lines just to say hi
Seems that he doesn't even know the difference between a profile and an email. Just copy/paste the same text everywhere and get rich overnight.