online today!Johnny_Sparton Blog Comments (7,939)

Having a family

Why don't we just draw up a handbook?

Having a family

Don't give them any ideas Molly.

Having a family

Very brilliantly summed up Ash...."duty."

Having a family

Hello Ash,

Thank you for sharing your experience/situation. It sounds like something of an unusual set of circumstances. There is no doubt...life is not as simple as just black or white...there are many shades in between. It will not be a one size fits all.

All my talk here is in regards to, in general or the expected norm.

But you are so right about fatherhood. I was never a father, but I helped raise my ex-gf's son for 13 years and it was the most gratifying (if that is even the word to describe it)...feeling and sense of worth/accomplishment I ever felt. .....in one word, as you say...."love"


Thanks Ash




BTW...I am sorry it didn't work out for your children's father to be closer.

Having a family

Hello Pepps,

Very nice to see your lovely face grace this blog.


...but, something tells me I might be just getting started on this equal gender rights stuff.

Having a family

Hello Robert,

So true about the biological clock thing.


But not to be confusing here. I have given it some thought, and I am not sure I would even want a child...maybe with the absolute right woman...maybe...but the likelihood of that happening...I may as well try and find a tall tree and hope for lightening to hit me.

This blog does not come from a selfish personal perspective.

I am talking about the male species in general.

...you, me, tim, joe, john, greg, bob, nick, carl.....every man....

The youngest female generation and male generation seem to be most susceptible to what feminism has brought to this era....but not solely exclusively to them.

What was the divorce rate a few years back 70%....or so?

What was the divorce rate about 20ish years ago...maybe 10%

Well, if we look at that with a little comparison to what has changed in society (feminism), we might be able to figure out the driving force behind the higher divorce rate.

Thanks Robert.

Having a family

In addition all....I bring this subject up because life is the most precious thing we humans have and can experience.

Life supersedes any amount of money you can have.

Life is more cherished than any other man made thing that has ever existed.

Yet...men play second fiddle when it comes to procreating it.

Having a family

Hello SR

Good for your grandson. He is there for you and all. I am happy to hear that.

As you mentioned, women have earned to have more control over birth. That very well may be true...especially 20 years ago.

Can I ask you SR...how would you suggest to a man to "earn" more control over birth to be equal with women?

Thank you for your post.

Having a family

oops....socially inept men

Having a family

Oh boy Molly....your response does not hold too much water in this modern era. I would have completely agreed with you about 20 or so years ago...but now so much now.

We are in an era where women are pushing for equal gender roles...and I say good for them. Should not men then therefore push for equal gender roles?

There is no way around the woman carrying the baby for 9 months before it is born. I get that. However, the argument that she is the caregiver for 18 years is completely not accurate.

Now days women bring home the paycheck as well; therefore, they are not the caregivers they once were.

I think if women want equal rights and men...the men should have equal rights to women...and that includes bringing life into this world.

It is not fair.

Having a family

Hello Daniela,

Thank you for the clarification, and you are right.

Regarding the obligation part for a man to have a child...I think it should be equal. If the woman has more power over the man for having a child, that is not equal.



Anyway, just something that happened to pop in my head and thought was worth pondering here on the blogs.

Having a family

CH...

If you are talking about talking on the phone, I cannot promise you my undivided attention. There is a huge car festival going on tonight I will be going to with a friend.

We could attempt a conversation if you would like.

Having a family

Just have a quick moment here...and seen CH's post.

No CH, this blog is not about frustration, otherwise I would have titled as such and wrote about that. This is just something that occurred to me. My hormones are in balance.

BTW..and of course I am not saying you did this...

But your statement is a great way of diminishing a statement from somebody. Instead of addressing the issue, just minimize the person. Ask Trump, he got elected.



Thanks CH...nice to see your comment.

Having a family

Hello SR,

The topic is about the desire for each gender to have his or her own family...and which gender has more control over that happening.

I would think that with feminism, the woman has more control over the man on whether or not he has a child.

Both genders have the desire to procreate.

Therefore, both genders, by their nature, should have equal right (opportunity) to procreate??

The 2 1/2 I reference is the average child count in each family in the U.S. during traditional days.

Modern Man and Woman

Hello Calm,

Yes. About a year or so ago I did bring up the concerns with feminism from a male perspective. It is not like I need to justify myself here, but I would like to correct your perception of me.

I brought up feminism because of a real and genuine concern I seen the movement causing in society. Maybe it was a rightful concern or perhaps just some sort of illusion.

If I recall correctly, there was a sufficient amount of conversation about this perceived concern of mine and the topic was eventually dropped by me. I think that was about a year ago...I am not keeping track.

When my friend brought up the subject on his own free will, without any influence from me...in fact, his mother brought it up to him. She is a woman I have not spoken to in over 20 years...perhaps even longer. So I know for sure I had no influence on her bringing up the subject. But when he brought it up to me, I felt there was a need to reevaluate my thoughts on this subject, somewhat, and bring it to the forefront here on the blogs.

Does that make me obsessed? I suppose some may perceive it that way. I myself, I don't think so...but what do I know.

The points of feminism you make are all great one and I totally agree with the beautiful things you mention about feminism are bringing women. ...happy as a lark about that.

But....feminism is being perceived in different ways by different people. ...in some (perhaps many) cases, feminism is leading to a man-hating, man-worthless, society.

You want to talk about being fair to genders....what about a man who wants a family of his own? A woman can choose to have a child of her own much more easily than a man who wants a family of his own.

Anyway, there have been some women who agree that feminism isn't exactly what it was intended to do...as you say. Ash is doing a much better job than me pointing out some issues that feminism has caused in society. I am glad she is doing that...if I were doing that, I wonder what sort of label would be assigned to me?

Anyway...labels aside...we cannot deny reality.

There are women out there that are feminist and great people for relationships...I am not saying all feminists are incompatible with men. But, the movement in general has certainly changed the value of a man to a woman....to the point of a man having virtually zero value.

Thank you for your comment Calm.

Modern Man and Woman

Thanks Molly, I will try and remember to remove the appropriate labels on my next blog. ...But, I would like to hear a suggestion on a potential good debate blog. I suppose I could debate your last response by saying that labels are sometimes necessary in order to convey a proper message.

Ash...Great! You straighten up Molly...would ya.

CH....geez. I waited up all night for you to find the time to post your response.

Non/Molly....now you two have given me some great ideas for my tattoo. Perhaps I could get both of those...one on each cheek. ....let me think about that.

RE: Chilling...

Goodnight.

Modern Man and Woman

Ash...

I read your shared article. Thanks for sharing it.

The way I see feminism, and don't get me wrong, many aspects of it are worthy. But, as I argued before, it means different things to different women. How far will some of these women take it? As you article points out, feminism is developing into this man-hating mentality among women.

Maybe in time women will see this for themselves...in the meanwhile, have fun finding love single men.

Modern Man and Woman

Ash....you do bring up a very important point about the surrounding environment. People are products of their environment and that does make a difference. Just like the national/global environment of feminism.

But....great point Ash.

Modern Man and Woman

Prof....Molly spares no expense when trying to find my jugular.

Modern Man and Woman

Hello Molly,

Being a single man and living in a feminist society, you offer me some good advice.

So your saying that feminism does not change a thing at all for men? Maybe you are and just did not choose to mention that.

I think becoming a man's man will not hurt a thing...as you suggest. I would argue...and I know this is about as negative as it comes...lol.....but, I would argue that might not quite be enough today for many women. Of course, not all women. I have seen some beautiful souls out there.


Thank you Molly.

I cannot wait to debate this further.

Modern Man and Woman

....and no Ash...I have no children.

Modern Man and Woman

Hello Ash,

I would agree that there are some couples out there that are truly happy with each other. Honestly, it puts a smile on my face when I see them together. It is nice to see true love in action.

I do have some friends that are single. I always say (this is a pleasant version of what I say), that many women are not the right ones....but there are some women out there that are good.

The real thing I say is....there are a lot of crazy f..k..g women out there...but there some that are nice.

...but as a disclaimer, that goes for men too...but we are not looking for them.


That thing is Ash, yes even with the 20 and 30 somethings...I see a lot of single women out and about...even if they are in a relationship...with a look of scorn on their faces. Is that the result of feminism....



But with what logic tells me, and my friend's 80 year old female mother....maybe.

Modern Man and Woman

Hello Whitelilly and welcome to the blogs. That is another breath of fresh air hearing another woman say they find a man attractive who can give respect, compassion, and love to a woman.

Thank you for sharing your outlook.

Modern Man and Woman

Robert....I am surprised she didn't complain because you could not spin straw into gold.

You sound like one of many men in today's world Robert. I think all us single men need to wait to win the lottery (finding the right woman) to get in a relationship with....well, that too...millions of dollars wouldn't hurt either.


But as some have said here on the responses, I am sure this is just another rant blog...to some extent...and nothing more. I just rekindle this subject because my friend's 80+ year old mother (a woman) stated the difficulty for men with feminism....and that is with me not even saying a word about my thoughts to him in the first place.


We can try and downplay the difficulty for modern man as much as we like, but reality will still trump any situation.


Thanks Robert

Modern Man and Woman

SR....those are all great things. What is difficult is when a man gives all those things and gets nothing in return.


I know...the wrong woman....but, it seems with feminism...the wrong woman is becoming more widespread.

Modern Man and Woman

Cc...thank you. So there is some hope out there for us men.

Modern Man and Woman

Hello Prof,

Talking to an ex is not a terrible idea...hopefully if that is done, the honest reason(s) are exposed.

Modern Man and Woman

Thank you Pro....It seems to me that the ones who deserve it are getting more difficult to find.

Modern Man and Woman

I suppose LouLou, we make good punching bags.