But Molly ... I understand your point of view ... One has no choice in the end ..... We cannot escape from the society ... and from others judgments ... we are the society. Why we need to hide? Are normal and sensitive people a minority which has to hide for surviving? One cannot say loud ... I am like this ... I do not care... you all people have to accept me as I am. Why is not possible? Is an Utopia?
Taking not serious ... Some people complained about it ... Other are not serious on CS ... Why not?
It's Just a Game (dissociative imagination)
If we combine solipsistic introjection with the escapability of cyberspace, we get a slightly different force that magnifies disinhibition. People may feel that the imaginary characters they "created" exist in a different space, that one's online persona along with the online others live in an make-believe dimension, a dream world, separate and apart from the demands and responsibilities of the real world. They split or "dissociate" online fiction from offline fact. Emily Finch, an author and criminal lawyer studying identity theft in cyberspace, has suggested that some people see their online life as a kind of game with rules and norms that don't apply to everyday living (pers. comm., 2002). Once they turn off the computer and return to their daily routine, they believe they can leave that game and their game-identity behind. Why should they be held responsible for what happens in that make-believe play world that has nothing to do with reality? After all, it isn't that different than blasting away at your pals in a shoot-em up video game... or so some people might think, perhaps unconsciously.
Although anonymity tends to amplify dissociative imagination, dissociative imagination and dissociative anonymity usually differ in the complexity of the dissociated part of oneself. Under the influence of anonymity, the person may try to be invisible, to become a non-person, resulting in a reducing or simplifying of identity. During dissociative imagination, the self that is expressed, but split-off, tends to be more elaborate.
nosmoker ... at least I have a real picture .. so I take responsability for my actions more So about hidden .... do not use this word ... you have no right to use it here. But I will think about you say .... because this is the point ..... on this kind of site you cannot communicate .... is not possible ... this was my point ... people do not want to communicate .... I wanted to discuss why is not possible .... But people do not want the truth ..... I underline that the article I read is 100% right . Internet is altering the ego . And who does not understand this will be confronted with a lot of issues.
My subject ... is to get maximum from this site .... before I leave it ... I am very selfish. I do not accept to lose my time ... I need to have a win .... at least in information when not else ... Seems that people do not enjoy to build something .... I try to understand what is happen here. I was on site here in 2008, then later in 2013, and now 2017 (since 2-3 month) ... happen the same
I cannot knock on the door of people house to ask them to talk about a subject. Nobody is forced to participate ..... Blog is a tool ... I use it in my own way as each of us is doing here.
Are you sure? Human brain is build in same way for all of us. Our barin function in same way. The only what make us different is some defects in the HW (biology) and the information filled in our memory area of the brain. Social life is filling our brain with information in same way. So, there is the same pattern in all of us. Of course deviation from standard are present at individuals. But are only deviations. I would sugest that in some points we all act same way. Else would politicions have power on us, but they have. They move the people in the direction they want.
This is a very delicate issue. I always told that humans have to decide what they want. They want competition and efficiency? Or harmony and peace, and altruism.
I had a manager he always told. "People who solve problems are hired. And people who create problems are fired."
That is very right. Also we do not get involved with people who create problems. The issue is the perspective on the problems. We may see the reality different. I see a problem, and you do not see it.
One fight to earn money, and the other spend the money. They both have a problem with eachother. One says "you are a problem because you spend the money unjustified". The other answers "Not true, you are the problem because you are selfish".
So where is the truth?
The boss decide to fire one because he considers that the problem is solved when the person leave the office. May be subjective or not. The responsibility is his. Nothing to do until ... is about discrimination.
I am here because every 6 months, 1 year, or two I change the location. Initially I thought I may use this tool to find people in the area where I work and live. It was interesting because I considered to find people who speak english. But more productive are the sites in local language.
But I noticed that people are more interested in a relationship rather than in other persons. They speak about love (which is a difficult thing) but they really need a companion. I apreciate more the women who have in this case a dog rather than a men.
I see this issue of searching a match and build a relationship like a psychological business. Since I have traveled many years in different location on the earth (many countries) I am aware and make clear difference between a relationship and a connection to another human being.
People have no idea what they lose. First is the connection ... and perhaps will be more or not .... when you start to search for a match ready for a relationship .... you decrease your level of connection to something very basic. You lose the high wawes of joy what humans may experiment.
molly You do not play games? Level 2 is before level 3. One need to pass the filter of level 2. People are in hurry .... they want to skip some filters I am very shy .... PM means very much .... Is like asking me out for dinner. To speak about myself what I usualy do not do to anybody I speak only when sleeping
I danced in two ways ... ans catharsis ...or as a prelude ..... I do not understand other form of dancig... If you condider is another form please tell me ... I am curious to know .
This is the point .... A good party asks to have same affinity with other peoples I am joking when speaking about dancing .... Flamingo is very hard ... I was in my youth a very choatically dancer ... Something like tribal ritualic dance ... I used the dance as a form of cattharsis.
Daniela ...what you would say in private what you cannot say public? I am open to private messages ....
But I like parties more ..... You know ... less light ... a good wine ... talking about the beginning and ending of the world ... when tired of talking then dancing ... I am an old fashioned guy What can I offer through the Bits, Kilobits, or Gigabits? Not much ... so what can one do with the internet?
Have you ever tried to list out all the different dating advice you’ve heard, even just the advice from other Christians?
Date for at least a year. Don’t date for any more than a year. Date exclusively in groups. Make sure you get plenty of time one on one. Don’t kiss before you’re married. How can you know you have chemistry without kissing? Put clear boundaries into place. Don’t try to follow everyone else’s rules. Spend lots of time together. Be careful how much time you spend together. Date a bunch of people before getting serious. Don’t date anyone until you’re ready to marry them.
Johhny Fast forward in a relationship is a catastrophe. The idea of daniela ... direct to level 3 ... I tell you, is wrong decision.
You should enter in a relationship only then when you do not hurry. A relation do not solve your problems ... it increasing those. Of coures if you are a stone ... then does not matter ... you feel and understand nothing
Oh ... I understand. I had two relationships in my past where I found the persons by anounce in the written newspaper. I read the anounce. And I called only that two persons. But the anounce were very clever written. And I was not wrong. No regrets. But special persons have special lifes.
I do not search for a date. Thatfor my profile says in a relationship. So if you are right, that 99% is going beside the scene ... then I wonder why people are complaining
Swami Blog Comments (165)
you feel and understand nothing
The Online Disinhibition Effect
But Molly ... I understand your point of view ... One has no choice in the end ..... We cannot escape from the society ... and from others judgments ... we are the society. Why we need to hide? Are normal and sensitive people a minority which has to hide for surviving?One cannot say loud ... I am like this ... I do not care... you all people have to accept me as I am. Why is not possible? Is an Utopia?