1540s, "to regard," from Middle French respecter "look back; respect; delay," from Latin respectere, frequentative of respicere "look back at, regard, consider," from re- "back" (see re-) + specere "look at" (from PIE root *spek- "to observe").
Meaning "treat with deferential regard or esteem" is from 1550s. Sense of "refrain from injuring" is from 1620s. Meaning "have reference to" is from 1560s. Related: Respected; respecting. To respect the person was "show undue bias toward (or against) based on regard for the outward circumstances of a person;" hence respecter of persons, usually with negative, from Acts x:34, in the 1611 translation.""
"Google defines respect as "a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements." This definition seems correct but, if that's all we have to go one, we're limited in our capacity to truly appreciate the great power of this virtue in our relationships. Do we genuinely respect everyone we meet? Certainly not at first!
How many people do we simply write off when our first impressions don't evoke feelings of admiration? How many people have we known for some time but still don't respect? The etymology of the word brings light and healing to this broken truth about our relationships. From the Latin, spectare means "to look," and re means "again." Respect means "to look again." When we find nothing to admire at first glance (or second, or third...) we must look again, and again, and again, until we find it. That's what it means to respect someone.
It's such a sad state of mind to claim we don't like people. To not like a person is a travesty. Isn't it actually certain things about people we don't like, often trivial things at that? Sometimes it's more serious or even dangerous defects of character (Jesus calls us to see his face even in brokenness). Sometimes there's real personality conflict, or even malice. Humility bridges this gap, and allows us to look again. Everyone has something unrepeatable and beautifully unique to offer, and we'll find it if we maintain respect. Keep looking.
How often does this failure to get to know people warp and diminish our experience of Church? We make rash judgments that we simply can't have relationships of friendship with certain people, and we fail to look again. Catholicism calls us beyond this superficial level of looking at our brothers and sisters. Christ is in our midst, but we must grow in the virtues necessary if we want to see him. Respect is one such virtue. But I Have Called You Friends Picture I've been reading this book by Mother Mary Francis, and it inspired me to write this post. Every page is another gem on the art of Christian friendship. How beautiful the Body of Christ is! May we all have the humility to forgive, and the respect to look again. This notion of friendship is the seedbed of deeper personal conversion, the remedy to our broken relationships, and the foundation for what JPII called "the civilization of love."
Believe me when I say I'm preaching to myself! As Church, it's our duty to challenge one another in areas such as these. It matters. So often grace turns all of our presuppositions and expectations on their head, and this is a perfect example. Rather than sitting around the metaphorical water cooler pointing out flaws and disappointments in people (which only blinds us), let's try and find something to admire instead."
Love has nothing to do with respect. Respect refer to a value hierarchy from wich respect comes. It is comparison. It is about culture and education. Respect is not admiration.
But love is beyond this. Love starts with admiration. No values and no comparison. Is just being present without any thoughts.
What you wrote here is the product of your mind. Is based on what you read, saw, experimented. Is based on your memory, on your past. Is commng from your mind. You try to explain words. The semantics teach us that words are alive. Those change their meaning in time, between cultures and languages. Italian say "Traduttore traditore". That means "the translater is a traitor" Between your mind and us there are many translating devices. All those are traitors. Your message arrive to us distorted or confusing.
I will say that people cannot be teached. They learn complete allone. This learning process includes a lot of stages. First stage is the childhood when they put questions all day long. A discovery phase. According to the answers they receive and how they absorbe this answers the people may continue to the next stages in different ways. . After a while the mind is full with information stored in the memory. Next people start to consider that all the information stored are valid an true and they start to use those as those are. This is the belief. Stage two .
When acting like this they start to discover that the assumptions are not always true. And they progress to stage 3. Questioning the information they accumulated in time (may be conciouns or not).
Stage 4 means deprogramming. Some people have the chance to be fully deprogrammed before their death. But most of those not.
What I said refers to individuals. Each person has his beliefs according to his/her past life.
The problem at society level is that the society created one (more) belief systems which do not alloud people to be deprogrammed. This are dogma and ideologies.
What is spirituality? Be careful do not sustain your own belief as being the reality.
Is dedicated to all who have the courage and passion to live the life as it is.... and make errors ..... Who have the courage to love .... and to be hurt ...
To all who have open eyes .... and respect the universality of men
Freedom means responsibility and not an easy life. Means one should care about himself and not to expect other to take that care. Freedom means to live with the danger and not to be afraid of it. So .. all people are born free (have this right), men and women. But some of those lose their freedom when choosing to align to some social practices, becoming uniform and giving up to think with their own brain, but accepting others ideas. When choosing a comfortable life, when choosing a social status, running away from the own life.
The difference between animals and humans is that animals live unconsciously. Humans are very proud that they are superior to animals. That they are intelligent. The top of creation. But intelligence means to act consciously. So long humas act unconsciously they do not reached the level to be named humans. They are just animals with one more quality. Their intelect which is nothing without the past memories.
Intelect use the memories in a copy-paste way and do what one have seen somewhere and sometime in the past. Seen in a book, at TV, in the family or job, Is just repeating unconsciously what onw saw and kept in one memory. So humans are conditioned by the past, ba their intelect and memories. Like the dog who knows that he have to bahve in a particular manner to get food from the master.
Intelligence is more than iusing the intelect, is about being conscious.
It is about the fact that outside world has power on the humans inside world. It is about that humans negative emotions may be triggered by the outside events. And people accept this state with pasivity, instead of learning how to disable the triggers and keep their positive emotions in any circumstances.
Same experiences means same way of understanding life. It is easier to communicate when People understand life in same way. People may grow together. But next "second" they already have different experiences and life may separate them because of the communication .....
We all develop our communication technique and message interpretantion in a System , culture Family, which is more or less in contact with other Systems, cultures and families. A closed System is a System which does not exchange with other System matter nor energy, nothing. Nor Information ( Messages as part of communication). So you cannot consider a Person as a closed System. Because is not so until it is isolating himself. A closed System may be also Family, culture, or Country when isolating themselves.
The member of a closed System behave in a particular mode. But when enter in contact with other System, their behaviour is changing.
Body language, is considered veridic because is hard to be controled by our will. Because is ancestral is considered to be common to all animals and human. But the behaviour is developed in a System. and is particular to that System. A Person changing the system automaticly is adapting his verbal and Body language according to his experience, So.We may notice comfort or discomfort easy. But not much more. We may speculate about the cause of this states.
A healthy Person may behave similar to a clinic ill Person in Situation of discomfort. But this not answers us about the cause. The cause is mostly a confusion. The confusion between the Translation (interpretation) of the Body language and the verbal language. One say something, but my experience says that he has to behave in a particular way when saying that. This way of behave I expect is comming from my previous experience.
So People from different cultures and enviroments have the tendency to Interpret different the Body language. And because of this we are exclusive interested in People similar to us, with similar life history. Today is harder and garder to find such persons. We Need more Knowledge to translate correct the Messages. To interprete those in correct way.
In case of a civil war you are prepared. You have an alternative solution to the regular army. In case of Invasion and defeat of the regular army you may fight for your freedom, like people in Afganistan do, without any regular army. This is the military doctrine of US and you will not change it. US keeps solution diversity in case of unexpected Military Events or agression against freedom or against the US Constitution.
But you pay a cost for this. In China is no Option. In Rusia is no Option. But US People have an Option. Guns and freedom together. So please be careful with madness .....
So we enter in metaphysic. Who knows and what one may know?
If the senses are limited how may one know the reality? Which are the tools? But all tools to research the reality are limited so you may never be able to know the reality using tools.
So the only way to know the reality is to be one with the reality. To overlap with the reality. Where or how one overlaps with the reality? Only inwardly without using any tool. Inwardly without using the senses and the logic. .... From this point on words are useless ....
It was just a quote to underline that lack of knowledge costs one .....
Absolute knowledge does not exists. Where knowledge ends are begining the beliefs and the superstitions. And those are uncontrolled (random). And people force their beliefs and superstitions as the ultimate truth and go to war for those. Not much love in this.
The end of the path is the peak of the muntain. Once being there one may recognize that the pathways located on the mountain sides lead to the top too. And one may see that people reach the peak from different diections. There is never only one path. The path one follows is his ... and one cannot switch to another. This is called destiny.
Do not worry people. Why are you so selfish? All what you describe here is called "the revenue distribution" in a global world. Onne cannot just win. He must also pay. When not freely ... then forced.
Sorry for what happened. But ..... who does not open the eyes ... open the wallet.
I told several times that communication on internet is missing soemething very important. Eye contact and body language. This are the tools we use to recognize the real intention of the others. A conflict between the verbal message and the other "uncontrolled" behaviour wake up an alarm in us.
Even when you are face to face with a person who has grown or lived in another culture you may be confused. The body language of different cultures are different.
I consider that people from different cultures who live together and able to communicate to eachother are special. Less inclination for doing interpretation. More focused on observation and less on thinking.
One need to see the reality in objective manner. To observe is objective. To interprete is subjective. Who knows that he has a strong imagination or phantesy should be careful. One single sign and will build an entire universe. And may be complete false.
I had experienced in Asia the communication with different women. I did not spoke their language and they did not spoke the languages I know. The first experience demonstrated that I saw what I wanted to see. In this case I ignored the alarming signals of he body language. I considered that is only a cultural difference. The second was better. I corrected my perception of the reality.
We learn with each experience. We adapt. So good luck for the next try. Do not give up, else you will lose the learned experience. Try to extend this and use it in each situation you are.
There are only cracks disposed in a random maner. But the confusion because of the disorder of the cracks, made you search the order there. And you found your subjective order.
So. You helped me to demonstrate how confusion acts on us. Our mind creates our own reality. And this is a subjective reality.
Next you demonstrate how suggestion works. You told us to search a face. And we found the face. We all wanted to see an order in the disorder. Because our mind cannot live without a meaning, And we saw yours. The face.
Is amazing how people can work and act together when the mind use a lot of trick to impose the own fictional reality. I wonder what is the reason we build a civilization and the animals not. We think and we create a parallel reality which is the reality of our mind? We impose our own subjective order to the disorder of life and nature? But what if our order is in oposition with the natural order? How will this end?
Swami Blog Comments (165)
RE: Can love exist without respect.
"respect (verb)1540s, "to regard," from Middle French respecter "look back; respect; delay," from Latin respectere, frequentative of respicere "look back at, regard, consider," from re- "back" (see re-) + specere "look at" (from PIE root *spek- "to observe").
Meaning "treat with deferential regard or esteem" is from 1550s. Sense of "refrain from injuring" is from 1620s. Meaning "have reference to" is from 1560s. Related: Respected; respecting. To respect the person was "show undue bias toward (or against) based on regard for the outward circumstances of a person;" hence respecter of persons, usually with negative, from Acts x:34, in the 1611 translation.""
"Google defines respect as "a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements." This definition seems correct but, if that's all we have to go one, we're limited in our capacity to truly appreciate the great power of this virtue in our relationships. Do we genuinely respect everyone we meet? Certainly not at first!
How many people do we simply write off when our first impressions don't evoke feelings of admiration? How many people have we known for some time but still don't respect? The etymology of the word brings light and healing to this broken truth about our relationships. From the Latin, spectare means "to look," and re means "again." Respect means "to look again." When we find nothing to admire at first glance (or second, or third...) we must look again, and again, and again, until we find it. That's what it means to respect someone.
It's such a sad state of mind to claim we don't like people. To not like a person is a travesty. Isn't it actually certain things about people we don't like, often trivial things at that? Sometimes it's more serious or even dangerous defects of character (Jesus calls us to see his face even in brokenness). Sometimes there's real personality conflict, or even malice. Humility bridges this gap, and allows us to look again. Everyone has something unrepeatable and beautifully unique to offer, and we'll find it if we maintain respect. Keep looking.
How often does this failure to get to know people warp and diminish our experience of Church? We make rash judgments that we simply can't have relationships of friendship with certain people, and we fail to look again. Catholicism calls us beyond this superficial level of looking at our brothers and sisters. Christ is in our midst, but we must grow in the virtues necessary if we want to see him. Respect is one such virtue.
But I Have Called You Friends
Picture
I've been reading this book by Mother Mary Francis, and it inspired me to write this post. Every page is another gem on the art of Christian friendship. How beautiful the Body of Christ is! May we all have the humility to forgive, and the respect to look again. This notion of friendship is the seedbed of deeper personal conversion, the remedy to our broken relationships, and the foundation for what JPII called "the civilization of love."
Believe me when I say I'm preaching to myself! As Church, it's our duty to challenge one another in areas such as these. It matters. So often grace turns all of our presuppositions and expectations on their head, and this is a perfect example. Rather than sitting around the metaphorical water cooler pointing out flaws and disappointments in people (which only blinds us), let's try and find something to admire instead."