Maybe it's time to start doing squats, leg presses, knee extensions, etc., Heart-Lease. Then perhaps those terrible nightmares will change...probably to walking on the beach in a bikini and kicking sand in wimpy girls' faces? Or maybe everyone in the dream is pointing and laughing at your bulging thighs? I've had those dreams, and believe me, they ain't pretty!
True story: was driving along at -12 (F) today at my usual 70 mph, and hit the brakes as a stop sign approached. Nothing happened. The brake felt completely frozen. I pushed harder - still nothing.
Then 20 years of doing heavy squats kicked in, and I put SERIOUS force into it. The brake moved, and finally seemed to free up. Moral of the story: being strong can actually save your life.
This is how it begins...one beautiful young women gives her opinion and a legion of razors (in my case, mostly rusty) come out, laying waste to beautiful beards everywhere (except for those of us with sloppy jaw lines...who must soldier on with hirsute camouflage).
Why bother with "PLEASE," God? For once abandon this free will bs, and just *make* women like us guys with beards! I have some cold light beer on tap for you if you will just do me this little favor.
Well, Claire, that's hardly a problem for some of us who actually clean their beards semi-regularly. Myself, I go the extra step of disinfecting my beard/stubble with regular applications of powdered garlic - which serves the double purpose of livening up makeout sessions and warding off vampires/werewolves.
RE: Funniest movie off all time
Three words, JB: LIFE OF BRIAN!!