I think there is a big difference between spirituality/religion. "Religion" causes division. (my god is better than your god)It has been the cause of more war,horror,and atrocity than any force in human history. Spirituality resides within us all.
I remember when I was in grade school I used to get teased a lot (redhair,freckles,knobby knees, googly eyes etc.) but this one girl was merciless. so, it was a very rainy spring that year and one day walking to school I had a brain flash...I gathered every fat juicy earthworm I could find. When I got to school, I took a handful and crammed them all down her back and then punched her in the back as many times as I could before she ran away...Boy! did I get in trouble!!!...but, it was so worth it...she never bothered me again!
RE: What's the best way to let someone down gently?
Look them in the eye and tell them in kind but certain terms...a clean break is best