caroljoyce Poetry (65)

Meet spark glow
Safe soft slow
Surely now know

Hesitate to reach
Heart deep beseech

Tender thoughts lit
Close tight fit

Connect sweet yearn
Land safe firm

Totally in place
No empty space

Apart wide long
Together burn strong
Belong

Soul heavy, lined with gravel
Soft imaginings swift unravel
Breath of hope kissed my face
Transient, gone, without a trace
Dread bends its dull, dry back
Thickly points to all that’s lack
Total empty now, complete
Loss is full and round, replete
Heart adjusts pain filled angle
Emotions freeze, knot and tangle
Fear, regret, gripping tight
No shelter, homeless, nowhere light
So many lives lived and spent
Haunted with unuttered repent
Feel jagged edge of every pain
Trace the stars, spell my name
Arms of loss open wide
Guilt and shame clenched inside
Despair mesh tight constricts the mind
Smothers all that’s bright and kind
Lessons learned harsh and jagged
Feelings crushed, contused and ragged
Puzzled love approach unbidden
Buried by shame, its beauty hidden
Dreams come loose and drift away
As light fades at the fall of day

Quietly phone blends air to bleak
Sings in silence sharp and deep
Undone letters touch and cry
Embers of want softly die
Words of love began unmeant
Read inside out, thought not sent
Slender slivers of quiet belief
Taken by the absence thief
Was not all that I really should
Not lived life to best and good
Knowing so I wonder, ponder
Why such fragile heart will wander
Yet happy lives beyond blue yonder.

Hurt is like an angel weep
Heart given for safety keep
Cuts sharp into the edge of sleep

Hurting cannot make for strong
Seeps out notes from every song
Makes the nightlight dwindle long

Soul bright hidden puckered cloud
Fear steps clatter harsh and loud
Glad is veiled in joy lack shroud

Hurting pulls the sweetness down
Tender hidden careless frown
Shreds up dreams without a sound

Hurt wields his harm shaped knife
Severs limbs from unfinished life .

This ship set sail from a port of light
to bring goods of love as is its right
on a most dangerous mission to assist mother Earth
in her transformation, a miraculous birth
bad storms are encountered most fierce and cruel
in lands where love and compassion can’t rule
its sails are torn, it’s leaking badly
rocking, leaning and listing sadly
as the ferocious storms rant and rage
they bring fresh heart break on every page
on this vessel many will depend
if suffering and darkness are to end
so it contacts by radio it's innermost core
it is told rough weather it must endure
so the anchor is dropped down once more
to touch reality’s harsh and loveless shore...

Yearning twists and turns inside
Stirring senses close beside
Silent longing fills the mind
Urgent strong and soft behind
Flickering wonder warmth ignite
Whispers of deep down delight
Chest hurts now with nails of doubt
Allow within equates without
Thoughts sear in savage random
Love and loss must live in tandem
Unknowing keeps the soul bereft
Yet cannot give cannot be left.

Higher, upwards pure notes flute
Into the vastness sweetness transmute
From tiny, throbbing, delicate throat
Crystal, soprano tuned in note
What wisdom whispers just how to sing,
Can you sense this soul joy you bring?
Streams of sound from a tiniest beak
I am dazed by the infinite power of the meek.

'How could you leave me when I needed to possess you
I hated you, I loved you too'

You rest now in the sleep of my endless dream
I understood nothing about what you could mean
Intention disorientated in meandering word
Replies thought endlessly but could not be heard
Did you really exist in this most sacred space
juxtaposition between heart and soul, your face
words now long lost can never erase
that soul I recognised and unintentionally gaze
a soul not wisest or most absolutely fine
but one I perceive to be very like mine

'Too long I roam in the night
I'm coming back this side to make it right
It's soo cold
let me in-a-your-window....

Minds seek, match, collide
Tender feelings reach inside
Words thrill, slip and slide
Align within, without, beside

Very innards of the soul they find
Gently they prepare the mind
For receipt of only dear and kind

Longing like a faded song
Wanting trailing soft along
Ribbons of hope bright and strong

The sweet song of words is such
Seducing heart and mind so much
What effect then would have touch?

Round the edges of my thoughts are crystal hopes
Of love sprinkled down in twinkling motes
Carried to the loveless in bright coloured totes
On waves of ecstasy tuned musical notes

When dreaming above the sky one night
The Earth beneath was lit up so bright
It looked like a star filled fairy light
Each soul was hugging soul close tight

So into the future on tiptoes I stole
Peeked gently into every person’s soul
Each was a love lit spherical bowl
Shining, bright and completely whole.

So I say to you, do not despair
If you cannot for today become a pair
For there is rainbow magic around in the air
Waiting to be claimed by those who dare

As she gains height and strength the sun's power smiles through the frozen wastelands of my heart.
The layers of ice frozen in time from the coldness of others slowly thaws
exposing the raw nerve endings of deadened desire,
and the ravaged remains of hopes and dreams.
As the first soft breath of south west wind
stirs the dormant bulbs of passion
silent and forgotten in the cold earth of emptiness and loss,
a tiny fragile white bud of love forms from the dead wooden stem of disbelief
and with the softness of infinity opens towards the light of your smile.
with a tender touch, like a butterfly's kiss, she opens fully
yet her petals are as fragile as glass blowing in the wind
and a harsh word or rough touch will cause them to fall
and the winter frost of hurt will cover their delicate beauty for ever.

Thoughts clatter and crash around my mind
Dragging along hurts from far behind

Striations of questions seethe around
No answers to why is ever found

Reason jitters, seeking brave
Rejection's freezing, wants to save

Fear sends laughter absent, mute
Dragging up smiles from their root

Ghosts of unkind behind me float
Hands, words, said and wrote

Memories rant, rage and squall
Fierce injustice seethes withal

On nothingness I can depend
Solitary, empty, trusted friend

Smouldering power of harm filled past
Whispers nothing sweet can last.