Can you tell me the way to...

It was beginning to smell.
Even driving along with the windows right down there was a definite pong starting to climb up my nostrils and slowly irritate the back of my throat.
A heady aroma of rotting vegetables and a half eaten fish pie from the other night. The empty yoghurt cartons, stale bread and congealed pasta were mild in comparison.

"You've missed the turning, it can't be this far."

We were doing a favour for a friend we were staying with. Taking some rubbish to the tip because the bin was full. She hadn't put the bin out and the bins were only emptied every two weeks. We had been doing a bit of gardening too and some older garden rubbish added to the melange. Only now it was a sunny day and getting warmer and smellier by the minute. We were lost deep in the countryside, not a village, town or tip in sight.

"Why don't you turn round."

"If you carry on much further we can take it to the tip back at home, if we're not overcome by the whiff first! I thought you knew where you were going and she'd given you directions?"

"I did, she did, but she doesn't drive and you know what females and directions are like."

You know instantly when you have put your foot in it. I was up to about the knee by now and sinking. The sisterhood always stuck together. Their sense of direction and map reading skills in a car are second to none. It's just they sometimes take a scenic route or slight detour because it's a nice way to go. I would never ever dare suggest they were talking so much they missed the signpost or turning.

"And if you didn't just keep on going, and stopped, perhaps asked for directions. Whoops, men don't do that, stop and ask for directions. Oh no, it's the caveman hunter instinct. You always know where you are and the way home. Well, we're not going home, we're going to the tip so stop at the next town and I will get out and ask!"

"Don't be long, smell gets worse when you stop."

So we stopped and got directions and found the tip was 3 miles up the road and you couldn't miss it.

"See," I said triumphantly, "told you we'd find it!"