WIND BENEATH MY WINGS

Hello love,

Today just like always, i got into this thinking mood, and thought of writing to blog, just get out of the pain and the loneliness.

Thought of the old times, when I used to cook for you just wanting you to enjoy things you loved most. the bitter gourd sambols, sambols with garlic, eggs and other types of what you liked best. I thought of the times I used to wake up in earnest, to make sure I had enough time to prepare all, so you will have a decent meal.

Oh,,i went to buy a few things yesterday, and I couldnt help the tears that threatened to fall from time to time when I remembered buying something for you. a shirt, shoes, a pair of trousers, darling it mattered so much that i was able to buy you something every year, after knowing you.

you were my hero, the wind beneath my wings, and you never really knew it that well. today, there is silence in the house, and i think of the times you were here with me. what we did, how we fought at times. i also think of the times when i made you feel bad in this house as well. i did not do all that on purpose, but I feel sad that they happened.

you suspected me of so many things, and so the fights were at times endless. but i didn't sleep with anyone else or love anyone else darling. that was what you did. you seem to be quite free now, and i could smile when i think of what you must be doing with all the ladies you have met from these sites, and outside this world but very much close to your world. your stress must be gone now, no more harsh words to utter, right?

I wonder if it is time for me to let someone hold me close??????????? I havent had any warmth in my life for over a year now, and it is unbearbale at times. But what do I do to stop thinking of you? Will another help?

today and always I wish you happiness my dark angel, I was tempted to chat with you when I saw you on line, but held back, because it would serve no purpose. you are what you are, and you wont live without all this fun you are having now.
I wish you luck and May you have the strength to face life with confidence.

I wonder if you have passed your finals. May be you have, you deserve the success, you worked so hard on everything you did.

take care my precious angel,

where ever I may happen to roam, I will be thinking of you.
always, each moment I live. If only it were easy to tell someone new i love him, and get into his arms the way you did and do, I wouldn't be writing like this.

love and blessings