iLOVE in the time of algorithms - 4

[ The author tries to seek a suitable solution when stable relationships are hard to find and divorces are norm of the day. His observations and thoughts will be presented in a series of seven blogs as the system doesn't allow to post more than four thousand characters in a single entry. ]

There are arranged marriages where people fell in love madly. There are love marriages which broke unpredictably. There are numerous cases where a passionate love marriage ended in a fiery divorce, and the girl or boy found true happiness in their second marriage, this time arranged by the parents. Clinical psychologists have shown that passion usually diminishes in love marriages and ignites in arranged ones - as we all know ( but often fail to realize ) the simple yet important fact that familiarity is inversely proportional to attraction. In all practicality; love marriages are as difficult as the arranged ones to maintain, something which people routinely choose to forget, and their propensity for failures is unappealingly large - as the partners have very little mysticism left for each other to discover and explore. The Key is to realize that people become complacent in love and after marriage. They take each other and everything else for granted and forget that you need to work harder to keep the flame burning. They didn't care to remember that you're required to reinvent and replenish and to refurbish and reclaim. They fail to comprehend that short and long term dating ( that could translate to marriage or live-in but not always ) are different ball games altogether. The key is to accept that probably you're not capable of taking intelligent decisions yourself, after years of fruitless dating and a plethora of breakups, and there might be a cute lil' probability that you'll be happy when your loved ones pick someone up for you - but don't forget to calculate the dirty ones ( parents taking the role of selectors ) first that i already gave you a while ago. In case you're finding them too boring to guess, you could possibly think of starting with, let me guess - Salma Hayek! She's angry, she's naked, she's both - and she's neither. And i must honestly confess that i always found just the second and fourth possibility happily floating around the web in inspiring visuals. Anyways - if you didn't feel shy seeking advice of your family and friends, how to write a power-packed resume, you shouldn't be now when it comes to get married. You might be overjoyed after hearing the one-sentence-long case studies that i wrote above, about parents turning out to be better selectors sometimes, but the million dollar question is can they be so in your case - and when you're utterly confused? Honestly, that's pretty tricky to answer. Sometimes it happens that you disagreed with your parents, and even argued, only to find out later that they were remarkably right - and if this happens more often then you must take a note and reconsider your activities. There's absolutely nothing right or wrong, only informed decisions, best suitable to you only. Our present choices make way to our future aspirations - if and only if made correctly. You might be more comfortable using windows, while it could be apple for your friend, and trust me - marriage's just like that. An OS with two types, namely, love and arranged. The cultural familiarity and apparent ease of usage of any of the two doesn't necessarily make the other alternative better, and if you're not working hard irrespective of your case, they both will fail eventually - GIGO's gonna happen sooner or later. Garbage in garbage out! Great, now that you're empowered with the fact that the ( once forbidden ) apple is rotten as much as windows are broken and most of the time, you must be wondering what's the way out - and it's undoubtedly linux at the end of the tunnel.

( To be continued )