“Nice people don't necessarily fall in love with n

"Marriage isn't a love affair. It isn't even a honeymoon. It's a job. A long hard job, at which both partners have to work, harder than they've worked at anything in their lives before. If it's a good marriage, it changes, it evolves, but it does on getting better. I've seen it with my own mother and father. But a bad marriage can dissolve in a welter of resentment and acrimony. I've seen that, too, in my own miserable and disastrous attempt at making another person happy. And it's never one person's fault. It's the sum total of a thousand little irritations, disagreements, idiotic details that in a sound alliance would simply be disregarded, or forgotten in the healing act of making love. Divorce isn't a cure, it's a surgical operation, even if there are no children to consider.”
Rosamunde Pilcher, dunnocomfort
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Comments (16)

I believe that the problem is that when we are in love, we often overlook the red flags that show up before marriage.
Why? We don't want to lose him/her regardless of the red flags.
We don't want to be alone etc.
Yes marriage needs work all the time.

wave
we always been knowing everything but then too we fall inlove ,we do mistakes ,we often gets hurted and the cycle of life goes on and on .....
Freemorgan.. I don't want to sound immature and naiave but I do have romantic view of marriage . You met someone, you date, you fall in love , you propose, get married and work on a life together. One need to get and take. Learn to forgive easily . Don't hold a grudge. It must be fun and not a chore.
Freemorgan.. I don't want to sound immature and naiave but I do have romantic view of marriage . You met someone, you date, you fall in love , you propose, get married and work on a life together. One need to get and take. Learn to forgive easily . Don't hold a grudge. It must be fun and not a chore.
Hi Free! Yes, marriage is work! Like everything in life, even if you plan a wonderful holiday in the Caribbean Islands.. wine

trying hard to make a person happy doesn't work out. Either that person is happy with you or not. We often make things more complicated than they are. We must view a relationship the way it really is and not in a way it 'should' be.
You are so right, marriage is work BUT can be one very beautiful experience when both work harmoniously together to make each other happy.heart wings

It's usually when selfishness steps in that things go very wrong.

Love is always worth the effort though love
I wanted to add that a relationship is not to be seen as something to be posessed by anyone. It is
a state of the facts which have to be considered by both. wink
Like Wallops, I think that if love lies between both right in the beginning all efforts are worth it, and in this case when it is felt on both sides everything is easy. Then work is like playing on a trumpet or skipping rope. sheep laugh
It sounds like your blog has been cut and pasted from the 1860 Guide to a Good Marriage.
I totally disagree. Learning to play the piano is hard work (for most people). Going to work 8 hours a day is hard work. Marriage is not 'a job' and it should not be hard work. It should be natural, or it's time to move on to the next one.
I suppose it might be hard work for people from backward cultures, who are stupid enough to let their parents or others decide their futures for them. Then I would get it.
free
Marriage or living common law takes work...but it is beneficial for the most part...give and take but sometimes couples grow apart...it depends on the couple's willingness to grow with each other and reinvent their relationship...
But yes I shall do as long as I am here....yes for sure.
you are my darling!
love_stick

your supremacist view is highly objectionable. letting ( outsourcing to ) the parents deciding their loved one's future does not make their culture backward or the person stupid. there are perfectly logical reasons behind it like lack of time or poor decisive skills of the outsourcer. even match-dot-com's algorithms do that for millions of people albeit for a fee.
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freemorgan32

freemorgan32

pune, Maharashtra, India

Dating for me over here not so sure,just if in my boredom I gets something gd it would be great. [read more]

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created Oct 2014
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