Too Much Too Soon
Recently I was chatting with a woman from here. We seemed to hit it off and I have to admit, it was very pleasant. We talked for hours, 7 the first night, 12 the next day. Eventually flirting began and then it became more. Long story short, on the third day she told me she was falling in love with me. I didn't see that coming and was uncomfortable with her saying it. I also felt confused and wondered if had led her on or if there was something wrong with her? But if something was wrong with her I would have noticed something during all those hours of chat. I saw no flags and don't believe she was a scammer. The feelings were real and after I didnt respond by telling her I loved her to, she started just saying "I love you" the way someone will do when they want to hear you say it back. This was more uncomfortable and I began to pull back. Finally I had to hit the ignore button and get away for a couple of days. When I talked to her again today and tried to explain myself she said ugly hurtful things as if she were a woman scorned. This whole thing lasted less than a week and ended as fast as it began. I feel bad about hurting her and feel responsible. Looking back I think I should have seen the extreme emotions showing so fast as a flag and pulled away faster than I did.I guess, like everything else, this is a learning process. That will not happen again.
Comments (10)
If you didn't see it coming you weren't to blame. Ignoring someone is pretty harsh though - you might have had your reasons, but finding she was being "ignored" might have really set her off (to say the hurtful things). If this ever happens again, be gentle and end it or say you need to take it slow, but don't "ignore" and then try to explain because the person will feel disrespected and hurt.
I had one sole experience with a nut head and that was enough for me since it was face to face.....
Unfortunatly normal people like most who writes on CS, and that doesnt include me
You were kind to contact her again to tell her why you did what you did.
That's respectable. Kudos
But her response was insane.
But I suspect she was a little 'off' to begin with.
Many of us know, how it feels to be rejected, not to be wanted and not to be loved enough. And many of us stay on guard, protecting our hearts and missing the greatest gift of all because we are sitting on the fence of feelings.
it does happen!! if not, how do you explain love from first sight?
perhaps she was ready more than you...probably you feared as it was too frank, I do admit 3 days is too soon, but hey emotions are strange they arrive with no warnings and leave the same way...if you are in love you just know it – no doubting, no questioning, no wondering, no convincing or trying to make him/her love you and no strings attached. You look into his/her eyes and you know it. Something inside of you just knows. That tells us every one is unique. Next time start chatting only for 2 hours and do not charm them too soon!! Good Luck
(For myself it would have been way to fast for me. I would have felt the warning, warning the OMG thing, now what do I do. Then do it.) Thus saying you did what most would have done. You are not alone.....
Good luck to you.