What do you men think..... (55)
drbombayStaten Island, New York USA42 Threads 5,391 Postsjlb684: I kinda like the ring of "My name is Bombay....DOCTOR Bombay."
You would not be afraid that I am a warlock and TY
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when i go into a bar on my own it's nice to make contact with other people but when i see a woman on her own unless she talks to me i leave heralone because i respect the fact that she is entitled to go out for a drink and not be hassled but this also means i have probably missed out on some great friendships and even relationships.
i am terminally pissed off with predatory men who have created a situation which stops me being natural with solitary women in public places!
i am terminally pissed off with predatory men who have created a situation which stops me being natural with solitary women in public places!
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Funny story about being alone in a bar. I was in Shanghai, China. I went one night to a very nice bar on the 63rd floor of a building that housed a major hotel. The view was spectacular; the city and river below were stunning. After one drink, I decided to move down to the piano bar, 3 floors down. I'd grown tired of watching all the romance going on around me. 
Anyway, I get to the piano bar and I ordered a drink. There was a musical trio playing that night; they were on break when I arrived. I got my drink and the band came back onstage. Again, the view around me was spectacular, but many couples around me making googly eyes at each other. The band's first song was.....
"Are you Lonesome Tonight?"
Their second song:
"The Way We Were"
The third song:
"Think About You Now" (a Gloria Estefan song).
At that, I said, "Check, please", paid up and left.
Anyway, I get to the piano bar and I ordered a drink. There was a musical trio playing that night; they were on break when I arrived. I got my drink and the band came back onstage. Again, the view around me was spectacular, but many couples around me making googly eyes at each other. The band's first song was....."Are you Lonesome Tonight?"
Their second song:
"The Way We Were"
The third song:
"Think About You Now" (a Gloria Estefan song).
At that, I said, "Check, please", paid up and left.
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ivanovitch57: when i go into a bar on my own it's nice to make contact with other people but when i see a woman on her own unless she talks to me i leave heralone because i respect the fact that she is entitled to go out for a drink and not be hassled but this also means i have probably missed out on some great friendships and even relationships.
i am terminally pissed off with predatory men who have created a situation which stops me being natural with solitary women in public places!
i am terminally pissed off with predatory men who have created a situation which stops me being natural with solitary women in public places!
It IS a shame, really. I enjoy conversation and when I am on vacation, I particularly like meeting other travelers or those who live in the place I am visiting. It's a shame that more of us don't just reach out and speak to someone near us without worrying about how it will be received.
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I think it would make a possibly large difference if you were drinking alone at a vacation spot, Jeffrey. It would make a difference if you were sitting at a table versus at the bar, of course.
I've never been into the bar scene, but I guess that if I saw a lady sitting by herself at the bar, I would suspect she might be approachable (which might not always be a bad thing for you). If I saw her sitting by herself at a table, I wouldn't make that assumption. If I were interested, I might try to catch her eye and grope my crotch and give her a come-hither smile. I would probably be too shy to simply walk up and introduce myself. But that's just me.
I've never been into the bar scene, but I guess that if I saw a lady sitting by herself at the bar, I would suspect she might be approachable (which might not always be a bad thing for you). If I saw her sitting by herself at a table, I wouldn't make that assumption. If I were interested, I might try to catch her eye and grope my crotch and give her a come-hither smile. I would probably be too shy to simply walk up and introduce myself. But that's just me.
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jlb684: Funny story about being alone in a bar. I was in Shanghai, China. I went one night to a very nice bar on the 63rd floor of a building that housed a major hotel. The view was spectacular; the city and river below were stunning. After one drink, I decided to move down to the piano bar, 3 floors down. I'd grown tired of watching all the romance going on around me. Anyway, I get to the piano bar and I ordered a drink. There was a musical trio playing that night; they were on break when I arrived. I got my drink and the band came back onstage. Again, the view around me was spectacular, but many couples around me making googly eyes at each other. The band's first song was.....
"Are you Lonesome Tonight?"
Their second song:
"The Way We Were"
The third song:
"Think About You Now" (a Gloria Estefan song).
At that, I said, "Check, please", paid up and left.
Not funny, I've experienced similar and was sad."Are you Lonesome Tonight?"
Their second song:
"The Way We Were"
The third song:
"Think About You Now" (a Gloria Estefan song).
At that, I said, "Check, please", paid up and left.
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jlb684: Funny story about being alone in a bar. I was in Shanghai, China. I went one night to a very nice bar on the 63rd floor of a building that housed a major hotel. The view was spectacular; the city and river below were stunning. After one drink, I decided to move down to the piano bar, 3 floors down. I'd grown tired of watching all the romance going on around me. Anyway, I get to the piano bar and I ordered a drink. There was a musical trio playing that night; they were on break when I arrived. I got my drink and the band came back onstage. Again, the view around me was spectacular, but many couples around me making googly eyes at each other. The band's first song was.....
"Are you Lonesome Tonight?"
Their second song:
"The Way We Were"
The third song:
"Think About You Now" (a Gloria Estefan song).
At that, I said, "Check, please", paid up and left.
"Are you Lonesome Tonight?"
Their second song:
"The Way We Were"
The third song:
"Think About You Now" (a Gloria Estefan song).
At that, I said, "Check, please", paid up and left.
I feel your pain, Athens. I believe that last time I went to a bar, they were playing Solitary Man, so I can relate.
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Ambrose2007: I think it would make a possibly large difference if you were drinking alone at a vacation spot, Jeffrey. It would make a difference if you were sitting at a table versus at the bar, of course.
I've never been into the bar scene, but I guess that if I saw a lady sitting by herself at the bar, I would suspect she might be approachable (which might not always be a bad thing for you). If I saw her sitting by herself at a table, I wouldn't make that assumption. If I were interested, I might try to catch her eye and grope my crotch and give her a come-hither smile. I would probably be too shy to simply walk up and introduce myself. But that's just me.
I've never been into the bar scene, but I guess that if I saw a lady sitting by herself at the bar, I would suspect she might be approachable (which might not always be a bad thing for you). If I saw her sitting by herself at a table, I wouldn't make that assumption. If I were interested, I might try to catch her eye and grope my crotch and give her a come-hither smile. I would probably be too shy to simply walk up and introduce myself. But that's just me.
Crotch-groping and come-hither smiles....be still my heart.
Add a cheesy intro line and I simply melt.
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jessejess47: Bare=are..
Freudian slip, Jess? 
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JLB, I think you should enjoy yourself and not worry about what strangers think. I'd sit at the bar in hopes that someone would come along that I could talk to because I'm a social creature who enjoys meeting new people...but that's me, and I don't have the world-wide travel experience that many of you have, just state-wide travel experience.
Enjoy yourself, and have fun. To me, that's what it's all about, J.
Enjoy yourself, and have fun. To me, that's what it's all about, J.
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jlb684: Thanks for the responses. Interestingly, my thoughts are being substantiated by what you men are telling me. There IS a stigma associated with being a woman alone in a bar. I don't plan on drinking it up every night I'm on vacation, but I do know that I will want to get out at night and enjoy what everyone else is enjoying, at least once or twice. So I will take the advice about giving it a go, knowing that I can simply get up and leave if I feel too uncomfortable. After all, it's my vacation and I'm entitled, right? Right!
Most women that I've ever dated feel the same way...it's uncomfortable.
Still though...you might meet someone there. I would suggest avoiding free tequila shots.
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Indyfella: Most women that I've ever dated feel the same way...it's uncomfortable.
Still though...you might meet someone there. I would suggest avoiding free tequila shots.
Still though...you might meet someone there. I would suggest avoiding free tequila shots.
For sure.
One tequila,
two tequila,
three tequila,
Floor!
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Since most of the women I know are career oriented, I don't assume anything other than they are decompressing from the workday, just as men are. Of course one cannot control what others think, but it's high time people stop assuming anything about other people, anyway. Be cordial and converse a little with the bartender--he or she will have your back if a situation gets uncomfortable. Live your life to the very fullest and make what you think others are thinking a non-issue. They're not going to be upfront (in this instance, anyway). I've been around awhile, and I have yet to hear a man in a bar say to a single woman, "Could I buy you a drink and then take you to a motel?" Kapiche? Here's I think you'll do just fine, really.
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rohaan: Since most of the women I know are career oriented, I don't assume anything other than they are decompressing from the workday, just as men are. Of course one cannot control what others think, but it's high time people stop assuming anything about other people, anyway. Be cordial and converse a little with the bartender--he or she will have your back if a situation gets uncomfortable. Live your life to the very fullest and make what you think others are thinking a non-issue. They're not going to be upfront (in this instance, anyway). I've been around awhile, and I have yet to hear a man in a bar say to a single woman, "Could I buy you a drink and then take you to a motel?" Kapiche? Here's I think you'll do just fine, really.
I do. Kapiche, that is. Thanks for the reply....and the
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jlb684: ....when you see a woman alone in a bar?
I ask this because I am not comfortable going to a bar by myself. I only go when I am with others. But it always presents a dilemma for me when I travel, which is mostly alone. I will soon go to an island and I know the days will be fine by myself. I'll go to some beaches, walk around the town, and enjoy the outdoors. But at night, when the town is lively and music is pouring out of the bars and clubs, I know I will want to enjoy the nightlife, but I can't comfortably do this alone. I tend to think that a woman alone at night is viewed as being on the make, wanting to be picked up. But maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned in this regard. So I ask the men here....what do YOU think if you go into a bar and you see a woman by herself?
I ask this because I am not comfortable going to a bar by myself. I only go when I am with others. But it always presents a dilemma for me when I travel, which is mostly alone. I will soon go to an island and I know the days will be fine by myself. I'll go to some beaches, walk around the town, and enjoy the outdoors. But at night, when the town is lively and music is pouring out of the bars and clubs, I know I will want to enjoy the nightlife, but I can't comfortably do this alone. I tend to think that a woman alone at night is viewed as being on the make, wanting to be picked up. But maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned in this regard. So I ask the men here....what do YOU think if you go into a bar and you see a woman by herself?
Fab pic of you, love... if you don't mind me saying!
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roseofsharon: Fab pic of you, love... if you don't mind me saying!
I don't mind a bit!
Thanks, Rose. Hope you're well and happy! ------ This thread is Archived ------
In response to: ....when you see a woman alone in a bar?
I ask this because I am not comfortable going to a bar by myself. I only go when I am with others. But it always presents a dilemma for me when I travel, which is mostly alone. I will soon go to an island and I know the days will be fine by myself. I'll go to some beaches, walk around the town, and enjoy the outdoors. But at night, when the town is lively and music is pouring out of the bars and clubs, I know I will want to enjoy the nightlife, but I can't comfortably do this alone. I tend to think that a woman alone at night is viewed as being on the make, wanting to be picked up. But maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned in this regard. So I ask the men here....what do YOU think if you go into a bar and you see a woman by herself?
I ask this because I am not comfortable going to a bar by myself. I only go when I am with others. But it always presents a dilemma for me when I travel, which is mostly alone. I will soon go to an island and I know the days will be fine by myself. I'll go to some beaches, walk around the town, and enjoy the outdoors. But at night, when the town is lively and music is pouring out of the bars and clubs, I know I will want to enjoy the nightlife, but I can't comfortably do this alone. I tend to think that a woman alone at night is viewed as being on the make, wanting to be picked up. But maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned in this regard. So I ask the men here....what do YOU think if you go into a bar and you see a woman by herself?
Hi jlb
I have travelled alone many times like you. It never troubles me to go into a bar or a restaurant for that matter. I have been approached in hotel bars but have politely no thanks, other times I have had a drink with people and that has been it.
One thing I have learned over the years is when I am in a restaurant that I ask to be seated against a wall as opposed to slap bang in the middle of the room.
Actually I have not considered what men think of me sitting alone. But I have never been troubled.
Interesting to read what the boys think here.
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Well the last time I was in Athens I was lured into a bar BY a woman in Syntagma Square. And once inside it was the same old story. She asks for a drink and the naive guy buys her one...But not me! The cost of one of those drinks would have been about £200 a shot! And if you don't cough up they'll threaten you. I wonder how many guys still fall for this kind of thing...
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I rarely go to bars, when I do it is generally on a whim. If I go at all, it is with other friends for dinner or perhaps it is football season and I want to watch a collegiate game on a bigger scene than what I have at home.
I no longer go there to meet women. I think I have pretty much grown out of that lifestyle.
I no longer go there to meet women. I think I have pretty much grown out of that lifestyle.
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Sommerauer71: Hi jlb
I have travelled alone many times like you. It never troubles me to go into a bar or a restaurant for that matter. I have been approached in hotel bars but have politely no thanks, other times I have had a drink with people and that has been it.
One thing I have learned over the years is when I am in a restaurant that I ask to be seated against a wall as opposed to slap bang in the middle of the room.
Actually I have not considered what men think of me sitting alone. But I have never been troubled.
Interesting to read what the boys think here.
I have travelled alone many times like you. It never troubles me to go into a bar or a restaurant for that matter. I have been approached in hotel bars but have politely no thanks, other times I have had a drink with people and that has been it.
One thing I have learned over the years is when I am in a restaurant that I ask to be seated against a wall as opposed to slap bang in the middle of the room.
Actually I have not considered what men think of me sitting alone. But I have never been troubled.
Interesting to read what the boys think here.
I like your new pic...you remind me of Carly Simon!
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