Why do relationships fail? (46)
yeah pretty much.. although I think you can get away with not having them all.
for example ..
arranged marriages don't necessarily have love (especially in the beginning) and lots of older couples probably don't love each other anymore (at least not like they used to) yet the marriage/relationship can last for years, often until death do they part
I also think touch can be taken out of the equations for some couples too..there especially if both partners are not the touchy feely kind of people as some people are.. but they can have all the other elements and still have a happy and long relationship
not quite sure about the building up mainly because I am not quite sure what is meant by building up... some people can build people up too much to the point they put them on pedesdals which in the end can sometime cause imbalance in the relationship and in fact cause alienation
JMO of course
for example ..
arranged marriages don't necessarily have love (especially in the beginning) and lots of older couples probably don't love each other anymore (at least not like they used to) yet the marriage/relationship can last for years, often until death do they part
I also think touch can be taken out of the equations for some couples too..there especially if both partners are not the touchy feely kind of people as some people are.. but they can have all the other elements and still have a happy and long relationship
not quite sure about the building up mainly because I am not quite sure what is meant by building up... some people can build people up too much to the point they put them on pedesdals which in the end can sometime cause imbalance in the relationship and in fact cause alienation
JMO of course
Well it's the opposite to pulling your partner down and I know what I'd prefer.
I think holding hands is good cos' if you let go, your partner has a free hand to go shopping with the credit card.
I think holding hands is good cos' if you let go, your partner has a free hand to go shopping with the credit card.
normalguy68: Well it's the opposite to pulling your partner down and I know what I'd prefer.
I think holding hands is good cos' if you let go, your partner has a free hand to go shopping with the credit card.
I think holding hands is good cos' if you let go, your partner has a free hand to go shopping with the credit card.
Some of us chickies hate shopping and prefer to use cash.
bonsai: Some of us chickies hate shopping and prefer to use cash.
Yes for sure..I much prefer to feel the cash my mans worked really hard for, that I enjoy blowing on crap. Credit Cards are so yesterday....
sxc666: Yes for sure..I much prefer to feel the cash my mans worked really hard for, that I enjoy blowing on crap.
gonna leave that one completely along sxc!!!Curly_2010: gonna leave that one completely along sxc!!!
alone that is lolCurly_2010: alone that is lol
ohhh please feel free to add.
Why do relationships fail?
bcoz humans are involved??
ok... seriously now... IMO it's bcoz one or both in the relationship are putting forward either a closed mind or a closed heart... in my marriage of 18yrs it was both... I made up excuses for what was happening rather than facing the rejection of it all and take it for what it really was (fear driven on both our parts) ... it eventually led me to close off my heart and move on ... very difficult to do but the bonus that came from it was how much better I felt mentally and emotionally... that's gotta account for everything me thinks 
bcoz humans are involved??
ok... seriously now... IMO it's bcoz one or both in the relationship are putting forward either a closed mind or a closed heart... in my marriage of 18yrs it was both... I made up excuses for what was happening rather than facing the rejection of it all and take it for what it really was (fear driven on both our parts) ... it eventually led me to close off my heart and move on ... very difficult to do but the bonus that came from it was how much better I felt mentally and emotionally... that's gotta account for everything me thinks
I think that sometimes relationships fail because we go into them for the wrong reasons in the first place - lust, loneliness and so on.
Plus, how many of us meet someone, are attracted to them for many reasons, start seeing them regularly, then realise we are in a relationship before we know it
Did we sit down and think to ourselves, hmm now is this going to last six months, a year or two, forever
My thoughts are that if the red flags don't appear early in the piece, we'll most likely just run with it.
And anyway, is there a specific timeframe that a relationship should last or else it's classified as a failure
I don't think so, and I personally think it's unrealistic to think that the person who is your partner when you're in your twenties for example, is the one you'll end up spending the rest of your life with. More power to those who do.
Plus, how many of us meet someone, are attracted to them for many reasons, start seeing them regularly, then realise we are in a relationship before we know it
Did we sit down and think to ourselves, hmm now is this going to last six months, a year or two, forever
My thoughts are that if the red flags don't appear early in the piece, we'll most likely just run with it.And anyway, is there a specific timeframe that a relationship should last or else it's classified as a failure
I don't think so, and I personally think it's unrealistic to think that the person who is your partner when you're in your twenties for example, is the one you'll end up spending the rest of your life with. More power to those who do.
I just think we get lazy and ignore the basics.
You have to work hard at anything if you want it to be good.
All the good relationships I've witnessed, both parties work damn hard to make them so.
You have to work hard at anything if you want it to be good.
All the good relationships I've witnessed, both parties work damn hard to make them so.
normalguy68: I just think we get lazy and ignore the basics.
You have to work hard at anything if you want it to be good.
All the good relationships I've witnessed, both parties work damn hard to make them so.
You have to work hard at anything if you want it to be good.
All the good relationships I've witnessed, both parties work damn hard to make them so.
I know of only one in my peer group that has last 20 years +.
But to continue the classification of relationship "failure" what are we going to use as a guide
Or are those that don't last a lifetime, a failure
Just askin'
normalguy68: I just think we get lazy and ignore the basics.
You have to work hard at anything if you want it to be good.
All the good relationships I've witnessed, both parties work damn hard to make them so.
Yeah Duh!!!You have to work hard at anything if you want it to be good.
All the good relationships I've witnessed, both parties work damn hard to make them so.
I mean is that a newsflash?
from the long happy relationships that I have witnessed the main ingredient to a good lasting relationship is the ability to compromise.
If the relationship is based on one persons wants, desires, beliefs and loves and not for both people eventually one person becomes disenchanted. That one of the main ingredients is not just love but respect for each other and respect for themselves personally.
My uncle worshiped the ground my aunt walked on, he placed her on a pedestal so high, for him nothing could compare. My aunt left because she could not longer connect as there had been a distance placed between them that she could not breech. So she left because she was loved, but loved in a way that was alienating.
Relationships are like life, everchanging, and if one of both people ignore change or wont or cant deal with it problems begin
JMO
If the relationship is based on one persons wants, desires, beliefs and loves and not for both people eventually one person becomes disenchanted. That one of the main ingredients is not just love but respect for each other and respect for themselves personally.
My uncle worshiped the ground my aunt walked on, he placed her on a pedestal so high, for him nothing could compare. My aunt left because she could not longer connect as there had been a distance placed between them that she could not breech. So she left because she was loved, but loved in a way that was alienating.
Relationships are like life, everchanging, and if one of both people ignore change or wont or cant deal with it problems begin
JMO
4romance: Naughty girl sxc ... condescending sarcasm qualifies for 20 lashes. On the question of relationships: It's like baking a cake ... the mixture has to have all the right ingredients for it to rise.
Whips so soon, we hardly know each other....
jem1964:
Relationships are like life, everchanging, and if one of both people ignore change or wont or cant deal with it problems begin
JMO
I really like that. Well said Relationships are like life, everchanging, and if one of both people ignore change or wont or cant deal with it problems begin
JMO
yeah.. well said jem 
lack of ...Love Patience Respect Freedom Loyalty
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Love
Honesty
Blessing - being thankful for having your partner
Edifying - building up your partner
Trust - sharing
Touching - not just what you're thinking, mainly holding hands, cuddling and eye contact
Take out some of these elements and you're doomed to failure