Are two coffee dates enough time to know it's not working for one of you ? (64)
online today!online today!ali110Hamburg, Germany1,842 Threads 428 Polls 27,975 Postslovelylass3: Just wondering how many dates to make you realize it's not going any where ??
i can tell u after 1 bad date 
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ali110: i can tell u after 1 bad date
Hi Ali
So when should we have this bad date ??
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lovelylass3: Hi Ali
So when should we have this bad date ??
hi lovely So when should we have this bad date ??
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I know the minute I see him, before he even says a word. The way he dresses, body language, eye contact and his manners all tell me if I even want to order the coffee, but I always do just to be polite. Coffee dates are an excellent way to screen if you want to see the person again.
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I usually feel sparks right away when I meet someone...or not 
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Most of the time once is enough.
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venusenvy: I usually feel sparks right away when I meet someone...or not
I agree that sparks are can be felt right away. But I guess that's simply a measure of physical attraction and not much else. One never knows what the other person is all about, where he/she is in life...emotionally, goals and whatnot.
I believe an initial date is only about gauging physical attraction.
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lovelylass3: Maybe it does take that long just for some people to relax and start being themselves?? So confusing..Have seen a guy a couple of times and seems to be a good one, and I am wondering if I may have been a bit gun shy just cause he was so keen.I Know I know we all want some one to care about us , but I found it a bit off putting when I was going away for only two days and he told me how much he would miss me ...help !!!1
I met a guy, liked him a lot at first, but he started telling me many times a day that he missed me so much, after just 3 dates. I ended up changing my feelings about him and broke it off. So, I can relate! Some people are just lonely, I guess!
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IT,S something you know .......dont ask me how....???......perhaps it,s the way she slide,s out of her str/ limo.....dripping in diamonds and furs....and two white poodles......and the sucurity.van...parked behind her..........having that first coffee...........
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becchristman: I met a guy, liked him a lot at first, but he started telling me many times a day that he missed me so much, after just 3 dates. I ended up changing my feelings about him and broke it off. So, I can relate! Some people are just lonely, I guess!
Glad you can relate to this.. I mean for all he knows I could be a total cow and I would have appreciated him just slowing down and really taking the time to get to know me as a person before showering me with so much affection.
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trueheart1941: IT,S something you know .......dont ask me how....???......perhaps it,s the way she slide,s out of her str/ limo.....dripping in diamonds and furs....and two white poodles......and the sucurity.van...parked behind her..........having that first coffee...........
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Carl96190: You should know after the first few minutes whether or not it is worth pursuing.
That's been found to be true in experimental conditions as is the basis of speed dating. Of-course, that is separate from getting to know the person over time...but the first few minutes will tell a person, both at the conscious and less conscious level, whether they are attracted to the other or not.
Experiments with young babies have shown also, that we also have an innate sense of what is attractive to us. A baby will respond positively or otherwise, to particular types of facial cues, for example.
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venere08: That's been found to be true in experimental conditions as is the basis of speed dating. Of-course, that is separate from getting to know the person over time...but the first few minutes will tell a person, both at the conscious and less conscious level, whether they are attracted to the other or not.
Experiments with young babies have shown also, that we also have an innate sense of what is attractive to us. A baby will respond positively or otherwise, to particular types of facial cues, for example.
..in that case ....i,ll put a diaper on .....put me on your knee.......and i will gurgle at you......Experiments with young babies have shown also, that we also have an innate sense of what is attractive to us. A baby will respond positively or otherwise, to particular types of facial cues, for example.
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trueheart1941: ..in that case ....i,ll put a diaper on .....put me on your knee.......and i will gurgle at you......
My luck, I will burp you, and you will spew all over me.
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venere08: My luck, I will burp you, and you will spew all over me.
....well that depends on what i had for dinner......... ------ This thread is Archived ------
trueheart1941: ....well that depends on what i had for dinner.........
Well, guaranteed it won't be breast milk.
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venere08: Well, guaranteed it won't be breast milk.
.......V you are fun to talk to.......but i,m lost for words ......re: last comment............. ------ This thread is Archived ------
trueheart1941: .......V you are fun to talk to.......but i,m lost for words ......re: last comment.............
Always a pleasure, trueheart, and thanks for the light banter
It's Saturday morning here in Aussie Land and with much to do, I shall take my leave...Enjoy the rest of your Friday night.
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uptall: Depends, how big are the cups.................
lovelylass3: Are two coffee dates enough time to know it's not working for one of you ?
One cup of coffee might be enough to know that there is "some" click (attraction) but to really know if that would work, no body knows, not even with many cups of coffee.
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In response to: Just wondering how many dates to make you realize it's not going any where ??
In my opinion this is too much analysis. Imagine it were not a 'date' but just a meeting. If time passes extremely quickly or you want the metting to go on for longer then sieze the opportunity else move on. I think a coffee date to start is great, at worst its 30 minutes of boredom :-)
I will get attacked for the next comment I'm sure but I'm not sure you ever really know how you feel until the 'deed' is done, be it after the coffee or 6 months down the line ( i don't recommend either f these choices) :-)
In summary I guess i mean to follow your instinct, dont worry about the NUMBER of coffee dates, more about the quality.
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