Personal Judgements (26)
You mean generally or for alcohol only?
------ This thread is Archived ------
Alcohol only
------ This thread is Archived ------
maybee hes a muslim,had a drunken farther or maybee he likes a drink but if he puts that youl think hes an alcholic,ive met a few people on c.s who put trying to stop or sociable smoker but infact do more cancer sticks than an I.C.I. begal..........its how we prejudge that matters
------ This thread is Archived ------
I always make it a point to try to never judge anyone...things are not always as they seem. It is not my responsibility to place judgments.
As far as the alcohol....some just do not like the taste and there are some that are actually allergic to the things alcohol is made up of.
As far as the alcohol....some just do not like the taste and there are some that are actually allergic to the things alcohol is made up of.
------ This thread is Archived ------
very good question; I try not to read too much into statements and to make assumptions immediately, because there are many variables. Over time as I get to know a person I am able to trully understand them. And also our experiences of life are all so unique, our points of view.
------ This thread is Archived ------
I guess its only human nature to pass some form of judgement on another but it depends to what degree, and what its based on. By "unfair" judgement, I take it you mean that the judgement proved to be incorrect??
If that is the case, that would be as a result of making assumptions, would it not? Rather than fact-based. I am not one for making random assumptions about anything, I do try to work with facts.
What is posted on the Forums can be the result of many factors, including, for example, what kind of day one is having at the time, how one feels, etc. I think there are many elements that may need to be taken account of. Therefore, I would tend to judge someone more on direct communication with me. I have had mails in recent times whereby, despite how the person appears on the Forums, have shown their true disposition and even a hidden agenda. So I based my judgements on that rather than a post that may prove to be somewhat subjective at that given time.
JMO.
If that is the case, that would be as a result of making assumptions, would it not? Rather than fact-based. I am not one for making random assumptions about anything, I do try to work with facts.
What is posted on the Forums can be the result of many factors, including, for example, what kind of day one is having at the time, how one feels, etc. I think there are many elements that may need to be taken account of. Therefore, I would tend to judge someone more on direct communication with me. I have had mails in recent times whereby, despite how the person appears on the Forums, have shown their true disposition and even a hidden agenda. So I based my judgements on that rather than a post that may prove to be somewhat subjective at that given time.
JMO.
------ This thread is Archived ------
I think that is a natural judgment, I have one family member who has been sober for 18 years and another whose a alcoholic so my interpretation of if someone says they never drink and are over the age of 25... That they might of been an alcoholic in the past. But i do my best to not assume anything and rather just be forward/blunt and ask :)
There is so much depth to every individual that nothing they say in such a short space on this website can give you justification to develop and solidify an opinion on them.
For example there are many shades of grey/gray (sp?) between black and white. You might say you don't drink at all but there is always a story behind it.
There is so much depth to every individual that nothing they say in such a short space on this website can give you justification to develop and solidify an opinion on them.
For example there are many shades of grey/gray (sp?) between black and white. You might say you don't drink at all but there is always a story behind it.
------ This thread is Archived ------
so everyone who remembers the seventies n ticks never to the drugs box are reformed crack smoking ,heroine injecting acid heads are they 
------ This thread is Archived ------
Dandy
By unfair judgement I mean it is unfair of me to assume a person is a recovering alcoholic simply because they state they never drink.
My judgement of that person comes from personal experience - being married to a recovering alcoholic for 10 yrs. It was a difficult relationship and I therefore tend to shy away from said people.
By unfair judgement I mean it is unfair of me to assume a person is a recovering alcoholic simply because they state they never drink.
My judgement of that person comes from personal experience - being married to a recovering alcoholic for 10 yrs. It was a difficult relationship and I therefore tend to shy away from said people.
------ This thread is Archived ------
I don't drink, but I used to (a lot), so I guess I am used to the judgements. In my line of work, someone who does not partake is a bit of a pariah, but there's solace in one thing I noticed: Not drinking seems a bit more accepted here in California. Or at least I feel less like I have grown a third eye in my forehead.
------ This thread is Archived ------
I feel its still probably better to find our the facts though, love, rather than make assumptions. I can understand your wariness but some people simply don't drink. Some are allergic to alcohol, some just don't enjoy it, etc.
I would probably take note of it simply because I do like a glass of wine from time to time. I had a friend who didn't drink at all and when I'd had just ONE glass, she believed me to be an alcoholic!!!
I would probably take note of it simply because I do like a glass of wine from time to time. I had a friend who didn't drink at all and when I'd had just ONE glass, she believed me to be an alcoholic!!!
------ This thread is Archived ------
I try not to judge anyone on anything they say or write. Sometimes in the forums one might just be having a bad day. Never thought about them being an alcoholic if they don't drink. Just thought they didn't like it.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Hey Assetts how you doing?....
Maybe it could seem to be unfair of you to assume
such a thing, but given what you have been through,
it is really self preservation and we all try to
protect ourselves from further hurt.
I have stopped drinking in recent months,
but it is because of the hot flushes which
are unbearable and alcohol makes them more
frequent and even worse!
Maybe it could seem to be unfair of you to assume
such a thing, but given what you have been through,
it is really self preservation and we all try to
protect ourselves from further hurt.
I have stopped drinking in recent months,
but it is because of the hot flushes which
are unbearable and alcohol makes them more
frequent and even worse!
------ This thread is Archived ------
so what seems to be happening is that we prejudge the situation often based on our own experiences. Language translated into language, looses its original meaning.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Never is a long time. What we resist, persists.
There may be many reasons, as people previously stated, why a person doesn't drink. The bottom line is that it sends a red flag to your intuition. Listen to your intuition. Following your gut isn't unfair to anyone. Not following it is unfair to you.
Do what you think is right. No one else can tell you what that is.
Good luck.
TET
There may be many reasons, as people previously stated, why a person doesn't drink. The bottom line is that it sends a red flag to your intuition. Listen to your intuition. Following your gut isn't unfair to anyone. Not following it is unfair to you.
Do what you think is right. No one else can tell you what that is.
Good luck.
TET
------ This thread is Archived ------
I do that too about "never drinks alcohol" but didn't really think about it being a judgment. You're right. Still I have a hard time with the words never and always.
I have so many preconceptions now I doubt that I'll be happy with any one man. The good thing is, I'm ok with it. ;)
I have so many preconceptions now I doubt that I'll be happy with any one man. The good thing is, I'm ok with it. ;)
------ This thread is Archived ------
Well said!Assets, being wary of situations that have caused pain in the past is not judgmental, it is survival instinct. For me, I have a gut reaction to the word 'separated' it makes people untouchable. Judgmental? Maybe, self protective? Heck yes!
------ This thread is Archived ------
Criticizing, condemning or agreeing with or even seeking explanation for the message of a post is the point, not going after, ridiculing , praising or insulting the poster, is the easiest for many on these forums, especially by those who claim not to judge the poster... it takes less effort to attack the messenger/ poster and is regarded as " a good put down" by those with not enough wit/ intelligence to deal with the message. Personal attacks is the main staple of the Int. Forums.
------ This thread is Archived ------
This Thread is Archived
This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.
« Go back to All Threads
« Go back to All Threads
More Threads
Kultur-multur
Gal / sdarlagg passed away on April 10, 2024
Democrats destroyed America
Unions support Democrats!
your favorite topic?
I'm a 53 YEAR'S YUNG MAN that lives back in the 80s
s*xual skills
wanting beyond need
the way you look
Ladies
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
Stats for this Thread
1,668 Views
25 Comments
in CS Lounge
Created: Jun 2007
Last Viewed: Apr 21
Last Commented: Jul 2007
0 Likes
I personally have to confess when I read in a guy's profile that he NEVER drinks, I assume he is a recovering alcoholic. My theory is why else would anyone NEVER drink alcohol.
Please feel free to set me straight.