Question for the women of CS ( Archived) (62)

I am guessing it is because of the way that men can freak out and automatically assume that the girl in question wants them to be the daddy..... because of this potential panic reaction, women have learned to keep their cards closer to their chest.. at least until they figure out what their feelings are and what the guys intentions towards them are...

Girls have learned most of these 'quirks' from placing their hand in the fire and getting burned.. whats for sure though is that most girls have a natural desire to have children one day, I know I do.. defo... but it won't be with any ol' guy.. so I wouldn't tend to bring up the subject very early on in a relationship..


hope that answers your question

I had to go check my profile, it does say Not Sure.

I know of ladies who cannot imagine NOT having children. I'm not one of them, and the more I think, the more I cannot imagine my life WITH children. (having worked as a teacher for 5 years, LOL) However, IF he was REALLY special, and IF he really wanted kids... I probably wouldn't mind adopting one, LOL.

Having been around dogs for more than 18 years, I do know what breeding is about (and how difficult it is to get it all right), and I certainly do not consider myself a prime specimen of the breed, LOL.

Well said.

There are infinite reasons as to why one might not wish to pick a match based on that particular checked subject. Keep in mind, for some, the profile details are simply conversational starters, not mandatory requirements. It may be a more preferred option to adopt rather than conceive & the available options do not represent how the profilee feels on the matter. Health reasons might make it a private conversation topic rather than open to the world, posted information.
Some of you forget, everything we put online, stays online. There is a trace record of it somewhere. I've noticed the Europeans I've spoken to online are more sensitive to that. I've also noticed they're more prone to exclude answers. Just my observation over these umpteen years.

Having a child isn't necessarily a 'yes' or 'no' matter, for everyone. My profile says 'definitiley' but it doesn't mean i'm up for having a baby with anyone either. I could even get married to a man and not decide overnight, if i really want to have a child with him. There are other personal reasons a person may want to wait, to let a complete stranger know what she wants to do with her ovaries. If it were that easy, all women would have at least one child, with each man they have had a relationship with. Now, wouldn't that be messy!


Regarding health, i have willingly dated a man who can't have kids. People can always adopt and i don't see why anyone would say no to love ( yeah, you know the real kind?), because they can't have children of their own.
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Baby steps.

Babies are humans, not televisions that come with a warranty.

... Hiya Lusc.... I feel the same way... I love kids and have always been the maternal type... and I definitely want to have them one day, but like you said.... if you DO love kids and want to be an actual parent, its less likely to be a decision you take lightly and jump into... if I have kids one day ideally I want to be in a loving and secure relationship (don't want my kids meeting daddy once a week in McD's)... and I want it to be with a man who actually LIKES kids and WANTS to be a dad... I don't want to be a single parent... I want to be part of a team of mutually supportive parents... family is very important to me... I am willing to wait for it to be right

Personally as a man (and thereby disqualified from Shadow's thread), I would not want any more children. I have lost three precious infants who blot my heart like a permanent eclipse already and I do not think I could survive another loss of this calibre. If a woman already had children I would not be bothered at all and would treat them as I do all children, with kindness and the respect due any person. Of course if something were to happen to the relationship I would be badly hurt and scarred by their loss equally but they will still have both their parents whether I was there or not. There is a great difference between having a mother and father and having one and a step-other. There can be true Love but you will always Love your parents in ways that can only come through blood. Of course again there are many persons walking this Earth that never should have been parents and the children in these cases are much better off with step-others to care for them.
Even after this minor conviction I would never say never because it is not a decision that can be made by one person in good faith, and the Lord will do as he sees fit no matter how resolved I may be.
JMO (slightly confused but impregnated in my thick skull right now)

Hi, Aries!

I know exactly what you mean.

I already have one grandson and another one due in November, I really do not want children who would be younger than my grandchildren.