Divorce (34)
HJFinAZSun CIty, Arizona USA870 Threads 1 Polls 17,068 Posts"FEAR"!!!!!!!!!!!! Fear of failure, fear of success..
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loverboy690: Hey dawn just droped in to say hi I have been up all night.and still no luck whats this world coming to?
Good morning.
Warning: Danger Will Robinson lol. This site can be addicting.Howdy peeps.
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Dawn7z: Good morning. Warning: Danger Will Robinson lol. This site can be addicting.
Howdy peeps.
I know I stayed up all night it's about time to take a napHowdy peeps.
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Sweet dreams, loverboy! Will "hit" you some other time to chat 
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morgan5: Erm...... getting married
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HJFinAZ: "FEAR"!!!!!!!!!!!! Fear of failure, fear of success..
F-False
E-Emotions
A-Appearing
R-Real
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LMAO
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Marriage.
I haven't read through all the posts, and that may have already been said!!
I haven't read through all the posts, and that may have already been said!!
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druidess6308: I've been married 4 times, and 3 of them ended in divorce, each for different reasons.
The first one, because I thought that he would grow up and that I could help him do so. I thought he'd change. My mistake, and I learned from it.
The second one was to the father of my children, and lasted for 7 years. That one ended mainly because of the meds he was put on for his back pain from an injury. They changed him drastically, and the wonderful man I had been married to for all of those years disappeared. I know for sure it was the meds because they changed it once, and for a week I had the man I'd married back, until he developed an allergy to that medicine and was changed back to the others. Jekyll/Hyde is the best way I can describe that change. And one person can't make it work...it takes two.
The third one was because after we got married I discovered that everything he was before the marriage was a lie. He became his true self after we were married, and after 4 years of marriage (5 yrs together total), I couldn't take it any more. He was very controlling and one of those men who has to "win" every fight and always be "right". I had allowed myself to be very beat down during that relationship until finally, that inner core of strength kicked in and I started fighting back and then left.
The fourth left me a widow, so it doesn't count here. I will just say that I think that there are many reasons that so many marriages end in divorce. There's no "pat answer".
The first one, because I thought that he would grow up and that I could help him do so. I thought he'd change. My mistake, and I learned from it.
The second one was to the father of my children, and lasted for 7 years. That one ended mainly because of the meds he was put on for his back pain from an injury. They changed him drastically, and the wonderful man I had been married to for all of those years disappeared. I know for sure it was the meds because they changed it once, and for a week I had the man I'd married back, until he developed an allergy to that medicine and was changed back to the others. Jekyll/Hyde is the best way I can describe that change. And one person can't make it work...it takes two.
The third one was because after we got married I discovered that everything he was before the marriage was a lie. He became his true self after we were married, and after 4 years of marriage (5 yrs together total), I couldn't take it any more. He was very controlling and one of those men who has to "win" every fight and always be "right". I had allowed myself to be very beat down during that relationship until finally, that inner core of strength kicked in and I started fighting back and then left.
The fourth left me a widow, so it doesn't count here. I will just say that I think that there are many reasons that so many marriages end in divorce. There's no "pat answer".
You're a very strong woman, who's been through a lot. I'm sorry for everything you went through, and your loss; it must have been unbearable.
I'm sure I speak for many, you're an inspiration.
Wishing you happiness from this moment on...
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morgan5: Erm...... getting married
Best answer so far.....
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in my case it was, me thinking I could change her, she thinking she could change me, and after many years of 
we just decided it was best to call it quits before we hated each other. now mind you, it does not make divorce any easier to take, it still hurts in the end. but for the kids sake we still talk.
we just decided it was best to call it quits before we hated each other. now mind you, it does not make divorce any easier to take, it still hurts in the end. but for the kids sake we still talk.------ This thread is Archived ------
Dawn7z: Yes divorce is caused by many things but unfortunately many of us lack the skills of communication and letting go of selfishness to make it work.
Being a divorced woman who was married to someone quite wonderful and it still not working out I know from experience. It was both our selfishness, financial issues and a myriad of things that over the years broke us down. We were together for 16 years and married 8 of those years.
Unless you go through a divorce you do not even begin to comprehend the pain involved. It is like being shredded when the divorce becomes final or at least it was for me.
Being a divorced woman who was married to someone quite wonderful and it still not working out I know from experience. It was both our selfishness, financial issues and a myriad of things that over the years broke us down. We were together for 16 years and married 8 of those years.
Unless you go through a divorce you do not even begin to comprehend the pain involved. It is like being shredded when the divorce becomes final or at least it was for me.
I totally agree with you. Noticing the failure is hard when you think your partner is wonderful.
But it's never possible to go back in time and repair, so the best thing is to support the remaining friendship.
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Idiocy. People getting married while thinking they can still behave like teenagers.
Hey, that's how MY friends ended up divorced.
Hey, that's how MY friends ended up divorced.
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