I walked toward the barn
in what was pitch black night..
It was actually closer to dawn..
But to my mind's way of thinking it was still the dead of night..
I wore my old white robe, which I had many years ago,
taken from some hotel..
during better times..
When the world was mine..
I had to lift my feet up and off of the mucky ground..
It was the only way that I could walk
in his old musty smelling dark and way too large for me work boots..
I finally made my way to the old barn door..
With fingers stiff and frozen by the cold and rain...
I lifted the latch... and went on in,
greeted by the grateful stare
Of all the horse there..
And all eyes were upon me with an anticpating glare,
I fed them all... then as I left them there..
I quickly made my way back toward the house...
and quietly as a mouse
I donned my night time clothes...
Slept a few hours and again I rose..
only to wonder...
Is this all there is...
Is this what my life.
Has become?
Exceedingingly..
Numb.