Dating & Relationships Blogs (2,551)

i came here after few years i have seen lots profiles i knew from years back then ,which were looking for dating
i had marriage for over 7 years


Is It :

obsession
addiction
nightmare
non ending lust etc ?

postive honest comments pls

In this world of technology I often wonder why we feel people are exactly what they say they are, maybe because we crave the illusion of them.

Not saying that a lot of people are not real, I have found over the years of being here, a few of the most real and open people on this site.

It used to be that you physically connected with a person eye to eye, feel their energy and either gravitated towards them or kept your distance.

We portray what we are comfortable with, I am the first to admit that, and then we get scared of the first physical connection, because we imagine that other person expecting a more perfect 'you', then you think you are.

We all have hangups about something we wish was more perfect and tend to hyper focus on that.

The thing is if you feel like that surely the other person has similar fears of their own, nobody is perfect and thank goodness we all have different types that make our hormones sigh and shiver.

We just need to find someone, somewhere that is perfectly imperfect for us, and someone who we don't feel the need to change for, because then you can lose 'you' and became a shell that's empty and lost.

It's just so scary.

Does your boyfriend's hair look a little like artificial weasel fur? Hmmm you might want to investigate further. He might be using a spray on hair product.

So, I come to this site and I check the Invoice. Sometimes there is a message, sometimes there isn't. I also check the blogs, seeing if any catch my interest (a few do, but please keep writing). And then I start on the "Meet Me" course, adjusting my search for any woman between 24 years of age and 34 years of age (I am 34). First, I start with my home state. When no results show up, I go for the option of all states and, sometimes, even different nations. I do find quite the unique individuals, women of different backgrounds from entrepreneurship to working in high-paying fields like business, law, and medical fields. There's even a few former military women on the site.

I am asked if I want to meet the woman, which I respond with a "Yes" or a "Maybe"; I only say "No" if the woman's status is married or separated (divorced makes me more hesitant, so I usually skip those individuals). I even give a few women a "Like" every now and then.

Now, I know I am not the only one who does this; it is a public site after all, and the options and preferences are available for all. My question is this: would anyone like to actually meet up?

I'm seeing some 'lights are on, but no one is home' dating site Dé·jà vu. I believe this place is running on autopilot right now. It looks familiar to the scenario of other (now defunct) sites where absent management became apparent.
Hopefully, I'm wrong.
My indicator is the amount of fraudulent profiles stacking up for the last 3 months. In two days I counted more than 20 new profiles with different photos of the same woman and her opening line is "I am a treasure girl" That is about half of the new membership so far this week.
While most of the bogus profiles send out messages and never return. Reporting them used to get their profiles deleted. The bad part (for the company) is it affected the numbers of new membership. Now, it appears more have joined the site, because the bogus ones are still here. Something that looks good if the place is up for sale. Lots of new profiles (real or fake) means more clicks and revenue from the advertisers.

I'm only basing my opinion on profiles of the women. That's all I check. My guess it could be the same for men's profiles. So as a whole, when someone says "This place is crawling with scammers" that statement has become true.

Why are most men that decide to mail me here are from Ireland?
I don't expect them to be from Spain as most live far away, so why Ireland, and not England, France, Netherlands or anywhere else.

Are the Irish looking for an exciting/ cheap holiday in Spain, with a sexy guide? Or just want to write, but then they are not great writers either, most saying, Hello, good morning sexy..

5. Have Fun With It

If you think you are in a relationship with a player, sometimes the best thing you can do is just have fun with it. Think of it as a friends-with-benefits type of situation, and let yourself enjoy that whirlwind of lust and connection with each other.

When you make a game out of their game, you’ll find that you’re less likely to be hurt. It’s also about lowering your expectations about this partner without lowering your standards about love.

6. Keep Your Boundaries Clear

When you’re interested in a player, it’s best to keep your boundaries clear. Of course, they may completely ignore those boundaries – but it’s still important to keep them clear for yourself.

As you become closer, you may be willing to be a bit more lenient towards them – and that is exactly what they want. Breaking your boundaries means giving up an idea for a relationship you deserve. Don’t let your date interest ruin it, even if your relationship goes so well that you’re ready to invent pet names for each other.

Related reading: Boundaries in Relationships – Keeping Them Healthy

7. Don’t Feel Compelled to Seek Revenge

Even if a player hurts, you it isn’t necessarily a personal vice against you as an individual. Players often see themselves as the main characters in a dating game. So when they make friends with people or enter romantic relationships, they see it as a successful quest and not for the pain it actively causes.

When they hurt you, you may be compelled to seek revenge, perhaps by sleeping with their friends or wrecking their stuff. If you’re a woman, don’t do that. Ultimately, this is going to cause you more pain than what it’s worth. And while you are perfectly within your rights to feel hurt, it is best not to act in such a way.

8. Be Ready to Move On

“Good people give Good Memories, Bad people give Good Experiences, Don’t Judge, Learn your lessons and Move on”

Kunal Tandel, author

Players often have a multitude of people they are romancing, along with multiple backup plans for dates. They may break up with you in person. However, they may also end the relationship by ghosting you and never establishing a connection again. You may get so used to the feeling of being on the back burner that when they ghost you, it can take months before you finally realize you’ve been dumped.

These things happen so often that it’s best to set yourself up with a mental timeline and be ready to move on. We find that two weeks to a month of being ghosted is a good amount of time to determine if it is time to move on or not. When you move on, don’t allow them to pull you back in; they had their chance with you, and you should not allow yourself to be placed on the back burner any longer.

Dealing with a player can be hard, especially when you find yourself falling in love with them. However, it is important for your mental and emotional health that you can handle being in a relationship with them without the fear or worry of finding yourself heartbroken. As you take the time to learn how you can spot who the players are, how to play their game against them, and how to manage your feelings and expectations you will find that the world of dating just gets a little more interesting.

Rise Above And Triumph!

If you fall in love with a player, the breakup can be painful. But, you can get through it. Rely on your friends, meditate, pray, engage in self-care, eat amazing food, watch movies that make you laugh, and listen to great music. Ultimately players end up alone. You can write whatever future you want.

A player in dating is usually a person who uses their charm to emotionally manipulate others into falling in love with them. When their victim happens to fall in love, the fun ends for them: they drop the relationship and head to their next target.
For players, love is merely a game. And the way to win the game is to enter as many lives as possible and leave a string of broken hearts behind.

Will a player ever fall in love? While they may not necessarily fall in love with anyone, it is always best to live with the assumed answer that is no. Remember that for players, being in a relationship is akin to playing a game. While there is a chance they might fall in love, their interest does not lie in building a connection.

What is a player in dating
8 Signs You’re Dating a Player

It’s a rather common mistake to overgeneralize things. Indeed, players have certain attributes that cannot and should not be ignored. However, it’s important to search for the strong signs rather than blame all the people on a dating site for playing.

Take a look at these characteristics and judge people around you objectively.

1. They Come On Strong

One of the biggest attributes of a player is that they come on very strong. In other words, they’ll tell you lots and lots of sweet things, tell you outright lies, and play mind games. If you see this, don’t rush into believing they really mean everything they say.

Players come on strong because they need to charm you as quickly and efficiently as possible to have a successful booty call. It’s a severe problem if they don’t worry about the emotional intimacy most people who want from a real relationship.

2. Emotional Unavailability and No Sense of Commitment

When you go out with a player, you may notice they are emotionally unavailable. While you seem to think you’re in a serious relationship, they don’t support you. Also, they may seem unwilling to change their relationship status on social media or not meet your emotional needs

In the dating world, when you are going out with someone, you should usually feel some kind of commitment from them. However, players tend to play by their own rules and will look at relationships as games. This means they feel no need to commit to you or anyone else fully.

If you’re also into casual fun, that’s OK – but if you want something serious, you’d better avoid players.

3. You’re Doing Most (If Not All) of the Relationship Work

A healthy relationship is all about give and take. This means that you both put in the effort to try and make it work. That’s why doing most of the work in the relationship is one of the most common warning signs of a player in dating.

To get a better idea of your relationship balance, think of everything you and your partner have done together in the past year:

How many of the things happening were your initiative?
How many times were you the one to write and call first?
How many times did you say “I love you”?
How many times did they say the same?
How many times were you able to be physically intimate without it resulting in sex?
If you think about it and grow concerned about the numbers or the lack of balance, you may be dating a player. Or they are just a person who doesn’t meet your relationship needs.

Related reading: 10 Basic Needs in a Relationship: Are You Getting Them Met?

4. No Consistency

You can always count on players to be consistently inconsistent:

They may keep going MIA
It’s OK for them to ignore your texts or calls
No matter what happens, they just seem to be completely over it.
When you think the relationship is over, they’ll start to love bomb and pull you back in. This leaves many women feeling confused and causes them the unnecessary pain of being heartbroken over and over again.

to be continued/....

Yes.. yess.. yessssss...

what do non-smokers do after making love?