Little Miss Cautious

Good day CS. I haven't wriiten in a while. grin but now, i have something I want to talk about, so here I am..

All my life, I've always been so careful and really cautious about my steps. Making sure that i don't make any wrong major decision. People around admired how my life is in the right direction. Giving praises to my parents on how they raised me well and and how lucky they are to have a chilf like me..

The thing is, I had people's admiration, but I was living under too much pressure. I thought I was happy with it, but it didn't feel like living my life the way that I can achieve the kind of happiness that goes through your soul. The kind of happiness that inspires you to be bolder and take risks.

I thought it was because of lack of a certain person in my life. A love interest to be exact. So I entered a relationship thinking that it would give me the push I needed. But instead of being pushed, I became more comfortable. Instead of bettering myself, I focused on bettering the other person that I put myself less in priority. After a long while, I realized the relationship is getting nowhere, and some triggering situations, I ended the relationship.

Then I opened myself up to dating again. I dated a few guys of different background, races, and personalities. Until I found one guy who suited all the criteria. He was one of the triggers of big changes in me. He is a great guy. Values, personality, availability. However, he made it clear that he cannot commit, so I stopped seeing him. It was difficult, but I cannot continue with something without guarantee..

I guess what I'm trying to say is, even when Ive tried to change my outlook and the way i see things, some values and beliefs never change. Ive changed so much, but I'm still the little miss cautious me..

Comments (16)

Hi BlueScrubs, it’s good to be cautious methinks but I’m the exact opposite, throwing caution to the wind most times uh oh

Few regrets in my life but I don’t let them bog me down. Life is meant to be enjoyable applause cheering
BlueScrubs
Hi Mimiwave
Yes, I agree, life is good and its meant to be enjoyed. However, this part of me makes me less fun than I wanted to be. I get jealous of people who can just ignore their doubts and go for it and trully enjoy the moment. But since Ive recognized it, ill be bettef at it.. drinking
Oh one thing though, you should never ignore is your gut instinct. Most likely they are right or they’re trying to tell you or warn you about something.

Regarding the guy who were not interested in a serious commitment, I guess there’s no point in continuing a relationship with him since you’re looking for something more promising? I think you did the right thing...
BlueScrubs
Thanks Mimi. I agree that I did the right thing. It's just a little sad because I really thought we had something good going on. But since he won't, I can't go on just wishing that he will someday. Thanks hug
Hi Scrubs..I get the cautious thing...I'm very much cautious too and find it hard to take big risks on things....I guess we need to just bite the bullet and go for what we want as there will come a time it won't be an option anymore and that's something harder to live with
BlueScrubs
Hi Deewave
I guess having no options is easier, yet it's going to be hard as well. I'm just gonna take things slow, as i usually do, so I don't miss anything out along the way. Thanks! smile
mollybaby
Welcome back, Scrubs wave

Yes, it is good to break through your barriers, take that chance. That is the only way to experience life more fully.
BlueScrubs
Thank you Molly! Hi! wave
Yes, i agree that's a better way to live life. To be less stressed and less worried and enjoying the here and now. But of course not being totally dumb with decisions. I hope. grin
virgosign
Note how all the comments made so far are from ladies....well I tell you girl, you have your head screwed in the right place. Not in the clouds or in the gutter. Patience, Rome was not built in a day, and you'll find the right other, so don't let the wait frustrate. Did you get to wear scrubs overnight ? .... or through swotting, sweating and hard work. Good luck wine
single_again4u
Blue,
Living "la vida loca" (Ricky Martin song) is cool, you have to try, I guess you need a little Latino blood in you veins. banana
SweetnFunnyChic
You will find a good guy. Keep busy with other things in the meantime. I am going out to an event nearby today just to get out of the house, something to do. I always ask when I meet a guy what he is looking for in life, if it doesn't match with what I want and I don't get that serious vibe I don't bother. Its good that you stopped seeing that guy, why waste your time. To get to know a good man one really has to trust gut instinct coz some say all the things you want to hear and are usually full of BS. I observe actions. Stick to your values and beliefs. Never change that for anyone. I wish you the best of luck. cheering
BlueScrubs
Hello Virgo wave
You are right, i know good things take time.. However, sometimes, if you know things are going good, you'd want it to happen right away... But thank you.. I will do my best... wine
BlueScrubs
Hi Sweetwave
Yes, i guess it is innate in a person to be anxious if something isnt going right by ones. I guess it's called intuition. cheers
BlueScrubs
Hi Single wave believe me there's enough latino blood in my veins. Hahahagrin
Hi BlueSrubs, I don't think there is anything wrong with being cautious in fact I think it's a good thing. Yes parents can raise you well but I think they want you to be your own person also.

I heard a old Preacher say once....if you have to worry and wonder if something is right or wrong it's usually wrong.....I often think alone this saying when confused in making a decision.

You seem very mature in your life, and even if life is unfair at times you can still come out ok.

It's good to see you again, hug
BlueScrubs
Hello wenever wave
Thanks! Yes, I'm sure my parents have the best intention and I realized not too long ago actually that it is more important to them that I am happy than me doing what they want.

And this "if you have to worry and wonder if something is right or wrong it's usually wrong.." i will try to remember during those times that I am in confusion.

Thanks a lot! hug

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