When your partner gains weight. (143)
lalasierra: Congratulations. I bet you feel much better.
I have never had weight issues but my sister has all of her life. I saw how unhappy it made her and I always felt bad for her. I would never call her fat. That is so derogatory. Instead, I would invite her to the gym with me and teach her how to eat a more healthy diet. She still struggles with it but she tries her best to diet and exercise regularly.
I have never had weight issues but my sister has all of her life. I saw how unhappy it made her and I always felt bad for her. I would never call her fat. That is so derogatory. Instead, I would invite her to the gym with me and teach her how to eat a more healthy diet. She still struggles with it but she tries her best to diet and exercise regularly.
Thanks Lalasierra! Yes, feels way much better =)
It takes time and alot of self-discipline and determination! I didnt realized that Ive gained so much weight not until family and friends started telling me about it and thanks to them :)
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lalasierra: 
“One often makes a remark and only later sees how true it is” ~Ludwig Wittgenstein
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Katherine_in_Sg: Thanks Lalasierra! Yes, feels way much better =)
I'm sure it wasn't so easy to get the weight off so you should be very proud of yourself.
It takes time and alot of self-discipline and determination! I didnt realized that Ive gained so much weight not until family and friends started telling me about it and thanks to them :)
I'm sure it wasn't so easy to get the weight off so you should be very proud of yourself.
It takes time and alot of self-discipline and determination! I didnt realized that Ive gained so much weight not until family and friends started telling me about it and thanks to them :)
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bohemianjack: “One often makes a remark and only later sees how true it is” ~Ludwig Wittgenstein
Honestly, I am not following what message or point you are trying to convey.
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lalasierra: Honestly, I am not following what message or point you are trying to convey.
Just messin' with you messin' with me..
"I'm a man; but I can change, if I have to, I guess." ~The Man's Prayer: Invocation at the Possum Lodge... And their Motto: Quando omni flunkus moritati, Rough translation "If all else fails, play dead."
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bohemianjack: Just messin' with you messin' with me.. "I'm a man; but I can change, if I have to, I guess." ~The Man's Prayer: Invocation at the Possum Lodge... And their Motto: Quando omni flunkus moritati, Rough translation "If all else fails, play dead."
Oh, ok. I thought I was missing something that was going way over my head.
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when at gain weight i think he become strong.
\\
yes i am also strong
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yes i am also strong
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The way our body uses and stores food changes as we age, and hormones (or lack thereof) play a huge role here. If my partner started to gain an excessive amt. of weight I would encourage him/her to visit a Dr. first, to rule out a medical problem for the gain. It is a trueism -Fat people don't grow old!
Weight is a simple matter of calories in - calories out. If you eat more than your body requires it will store the excess. I would point this out and encourage smaller portion sizes and exercise to burn off the excess. Often times smaller meals and more frequent eating to maintain even blood sugar levels may be the simple solution. Crash diets are probably the worst thing a person can do to try and lose weight!
Our preferences, likes and dislikes are a part of who we are, they define us, and it is a foolish person who ignores their existence. If a relationship has a solid foundation based on mutual love, caring and understanding...a truthful acknowledgment of reality, by either partner, should not dampen those feelings. IMHO
Weight is a simple matter of calories in - calories out. If you eat more than your body requires it will store the excess. I would point this out and encourage smaller portion sizes and exercise to burn off the excess. Often times smaller meals and more frequent eating to maintain even blood sugar levels may be the simple solution. Crash diets are probably the worst thing a person can do to try and lose weight!
Our preferences, likes and dislikes are a part of who we are, they define us, and it is a foolish person who ignores their existence. If a relationship has a solid foundation based on mutual love, caring and understanding...a truthful acknowledgment of reality, by either partner, should not dampen those feelings. IMHO
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CasualCarol: The way our body uses and stores food changes as we age, and hormones (or lack thereof) play a huge role here. If my partner started to gain an excessive amt. of weight I would encourage him/her to visit a Dr. first, to rule out a medical problem for the gain. It is a trueism -Fat people don't grow old!
Weight is a simple matter of calories in - calories out. If you eat more than your body requires it will store the excess. I would point this out and encourage smaller portion sizes and exercise to burn off the excess. Often times smaller meals and more frequent eating to maintain even blood sugar levels may be the simple solution. Crash diets are probably the worst thing a person can do to try and lose weight!
Our preferences, likes and dislikes are a part of who we are, they define us, and it is a foolish person who ignores their existence. If a relationship has a solid foundation based on mutual love, caring and understanding...a truthful acknowledgment of reality, by either partner, should not dampen those feelings. IMHO
Weight is a simple matter of calories in - calories out. If you eat more than your body requires it will store the excess. I would point this out and encourage smaller portion sizes and exercise to burn off the excess. Often times smaller meals and more frequent eating to maintain even blood sugar levels may be the simple solution. Crash diets are probably the worst thing a person can do to try and lose weight!
Our preferences, likes and dislikes are a part of who we are, they define us, and it is a foolish person who ignores their existence. If a relationship has a solid foundation based on mutual love, caring and understanding...a truthful acknowledgment of reality, by either partner, should not dampen those feelings. IMHO
Well said!
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I have been in that position. I don't go to Gym but walk and do yoga and generally try and keep myself in shape via diet and exercise.
I had a partner who just completely let himself go. it was very embarrassing because his belly became huge.... I saw this as a symptom.
A symptom that things werenot right in the relationship and with him. I tactfully mentioned the health hazards of a huge belly and that didnt work, Then I had to become honest and say that he had become very nonchalant ans wasnt trying anymore, either in his mode of dress, hygeine, and his fat. Sometimes it can be that he or she is taking you for granted... or are depressed
I had a partner who just completely let himself go. it was very embarrassing because his belly became huge.... I saw this as a symptom.
A symptom that things werenot right in the relationship and with him. I tactfully mentioned the health hazards of a huge belly and that didnt work, Then I had to become honest and say that he had become very nonchalant ans wasnt trying anymore, either in his mode of dress, hygeine, and his fat. Sometimes it can be that he or she is taking you for granted... or are depressed
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It depends on the circumstances.
Middle age spread is hereditary for many people and there isn't much they can do about it. It's not so much a "letting go" of former discipline but rather an innate change in the metabolic rate. One can try to adapt, but it's not that easy.
I think that the natural healthy attitude allowing continued happiness, is that by that time in life when the body starts to spread out, one's values should have matured away from being based on physical attraction to being based on love for the person that dwells inside the body, no matter how their appearance may have changed.
Those who don't make that change are pretty much doomed to despair as, despite all their efforts, their own body too will one day lose its physical appeal. If they can't accept the ravages of age in their mate they aren't going to be able to accept it in themselves.
Middle age spread is hereditary for many people and there isn't much they can do about it. It's not so much a "letting go" of former discipline but rather an innate change in the metabolic rate. One can try to adapt, but it's not that easy.
I think that the natural healthy attitude allowing continued happiness, is that by that time in life when the body starts to spread out, one's values should have matured away from being based on physical attraction to being based on love for the person that dwells inside the body, no matter how their appearance may have changed.
Those who don't make that change are pretty much doomed to despair as, despite all their efforts, their own body too will one day lose its physical appeal. If they can't accept the ravages of age in their mate they aren't going to be able to accept it in themselves.
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no I probably would not mention it unless he did. we could plan being mor active.
and no I it doesn't matter we he to mention it to we if I gained, but that doesn;t mean I will do anything about it...whatever the circumstances the door opens both ways...
but I might (do somethng about it) especially ig it meant "shared activity"
and no I it doesn't matter we he to mention it to we if I gained, but that doesn;t mean I will do anything about it...whatever the circumstances the door opens both ways...
but I might (do somethng about it) especially ig it meant "shared activity"
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felixis99: no I probably would not mention it unless he did. we could plan being mor active.
and no I it doesn't matter were he to mention it to me if I gained, but that doesn;t mean I will do anything about it...whatever the circumstances the door opens both ways...
but I might (do something about it) especially if it meant "shared activity"
and no I it doesn't matter were he to mention it to me if I gained, but that doesn;t mean I will do anything about it...whatever the circumstances the door opens both ways...
but I might (do something about it) especially if it meant "shared activity"
sorry forgot to correct my typos...corrections made
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Dear NotaBlonde, I am exactly the same as you !! I was a size 8 to 10 and it suited me as I am very small boned, I had very shapely legs and a tiny 23inch waist !! I could eat what I wanted... but, I smoked, then at nearly 30, I gave them up and of course the metabolism slowed down but If I eat anything with Wheat in it, my weight just baloons, as well as sugar but its mainly the Wheat. People say intolerances is a 'new age' disease but I know, if I wish to feel well and lose half a stone very quickly I just go straight onto Rice Cakes [yuck !] stay away from Pasta, and all wheat products [hard coz its in everything, plus maize starch] and the weight drops off, however, life isnt worth living as its an anti-social diet. You are lovely the way you are.
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Me again ! Just want to say in reply to that nice man who spoke about how we should love the person whatever happens to our loved ones appearance, that is right, and you are correct about middle age spread, but there is a thing called obesity, laziness and just 'giving up' on your personal appearance, I perceive this to be a lack of respect for yourself and indeed for your partner; particularly the hygeine end of things.
~~ I would like to ad a ps here about my partner who put on alot of belly weight and let himself go and started to eat rubbish food. I got him to go to the doctor, I tried and tried to help him.
I am not a shallow person but don't you think when you fell in love with a handsome man with a chubby body and he has become obsessed with food and just eats and won't see a psychiatrist or Doctor about his emotional or weight problem that he is disrespecing his partner ?
THE MOST INTERSTING PART OF THIS IS.... HE WAS ALWAYS ADMIRING BEAUTIFUL WOMEN ON T.V. , IN MAGAZINES AND IN THE MEDIA, ON THE STREET AND I FELT TERRIBLE. SO HE WAS VERY MUCH INTO BEAUTY.
~~ I would like to ad a ps here about my partner who put on alot of belly weight and let himself go and started to eat rubbish food. I got him to go to the doctor, I tried and tried to help him.
I am not a shallow person but don't you think when you fell in love with a handsome man with a chubby body and he has become obsessed with food and just eats and won't see a psychiatrist or Doctor about his emotional or weight problem that he is disrespecing his partner ?
THE MOST INTERSTING PART OF THIS IS.... HE WAS ALWAYS ADMIRING BEAUTIFUL WOMEN ON T.V. , IN MAGAZINES AND IN THE MEDIA, ON THE STREET AND I FELT TERRIBLE. SO HE WAS VERY MUCH INTO BEAUTY.
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lalasierra: When your partner gains weight and it has gotten to the point where you are starting to get turned off by it, do you mention it to him/her?
AND
Would you want your partner to bring it to your attention that you've gained weight and it has become unattractive to him? Could you handle the truth?
AND
Would you want your partner to bring it to your attention that you've gained weight and it has become unattractive to him? Could you handle the truth?
You're suppose to love them or better or worse. But everyone looks at a person's physic instead of real deep down true love.
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goldengloss: Me again ! Just want to say in reply to that nice man who spoke about how we should love the person whatever happens to our loved ones appearance, that is right, and you are correct about middle age spread, but there is a thing called obesity, laziness and just 'giving up' on your personal appearance, I perceive this to be a lack of respect for yourself and indeed for your partner; particularly the hygeine end of things.
~~ I would like to ad a ps here about my partner who put on alot of belly weight and let himself go and started to eat rubbish food. I got him to go to the doctor, I tried and tried to help him.
I am not a shallow person but don't you think when you fell in love with a handsome man with a chubby body and he has become obsessed with food and just eats and won't see a psychiatrist or Doctor about his emotional or weight problem that he is disrespecing his partner ?
THE MOST INTERSTING PART OF THIS IS.... HE WAS ALWAYS ADMIRING BEAUTIFUL WOMEN ON T.V. , IN MAGAZINES AND IN THE MEDIA, ON THE STREET AND I FELT TERRIBLE. SO HE WAS VERY MUCH INTO BEAUTY.
~~ I would like to ad a ps here about my partner who put on alot of belly weight and let himself go and started to eat rubbish food. I got him to go to the doctor, I tried and tried to help him.
I am not a shallow person but don't you think when you fell in love with a handsome man with a chubby body and he has become obsessed with food and just eats and won't see a psychiatrist or Doctor about his emotional or weight problem that he is disrespecing his partner ?
THE MOST INTERSTING PART OF THIS IS.... HE WAS ALWAYS ADMIRING BEAUTIFUL WOMEN ON T.V. , IN MAGAZINES AND IN THE MEDIA, ON THE STREET AND I FELT TERRIBLE. SO HE WAS VERY MUCH INTO BEAUTY.
Yes I am one of those unfortunate people ho have the metabolism to put on weight, fortunately I don't go into denial and think enough of my friends to present a good me to them.
I can control my intake of calories and use the gym and exercise and have always managed to trim down. It was no great hardship but I thank my critical friends for their egging me on to a healthy weight.
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Congratulations.
I have never had weight issues but my sister has all of her life. I saw how unhappy it made her and I always felt bad for her. I would never call her fat. That is so derogatory. Instead, I would invite her to the gym with me and teach her how to eat a more healthy diet. She still struggles with it but she tries her best to diet and exercise regularly.