Age, and getting set in our ways (104)
buzzy: I think you missed my point here. In the states this happens alot. Women now find themselves alone and having to do something with their lives. It is not that she is a victim, but she has found herself in a new set of circumstances and changes need to be made.
Ya mean versus previously doing sweet FA with their lives?
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Interesting comment...!
venere08: Ya mean versus previously doing sweet FA with their lives?
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Lagoona22: Interesting comment...!
How so?
In any case, you've abandoned your cafe again
And don't expect me to do any more waitressing, its pretty late here you know
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You've been a total trooper about the waitressing thang, I know.....may I remind you that with your severance pay, there is quite an attractive bone-nus....so to say....
venere08: How so?
In any case, you've abandoned your cafe again
And don't expect me to do any more waitressing, its pretty late here you know
In any case, you've abandoned your cafe again
And don't expect me to do any more waitressing, its pretty late here you know
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buzzy: I think you missed my point here. In the states this happens alot. Women now find themselves alone and having to do something with their lives. It is not that she is a victim, but she has found herself in a new set of circumstances and changes need to be made.
so new circumstances and changes need to be made, but so many stop instead, and refuse to change or learn new ways, they just woller in it, and when one refuses to change the bad about themselves, they become as selfcentered, and want people to feel sorry for them, and in time, they are so to say ,UNDATEABLE due to closed minds , but that makes our search narrowed even more,
Then the ones that do change, and wont make that mistake again, have learned WHAT NOT TO DO! and become set in their minds too ! Some for right and some for wrong , but now dating is complicated, for so many are set in their ways, This is EXACTLY what my point of this post to see, and share, how many are not even dating material, But still on here, so millions are here but only hundreds are open enough to be good dating material.
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HotrodLarrys: I have been making changes in my life for many years now , and life has gotten far better, and the better choices i make now , the better results i will have in the futureand thank you all for your comments , suggestions, and opinions
this is hearing from many different viewpoints, and all of us are at different place in our life, so it was good to see from many sides, interesting,
this is hearing from many different viewpoints, and all of us are at different place in our life, so it was good to see from many sides, interesting,
That is why I find this place so intriguing. Many different cultures, many side to every thought..
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HotrodLarrys: so new circumstances and changes need to be made, but so many stop instead, and refuse to change or learn new ways, they just woller in it, and when one refuses to change the bad about themselves, they become as selfcentered, and want people to feel sorry for them, and in time, they are so to say ,UNDATEABLE due to closed minds , but that makes our search narrowed even more,
Then the ones that do change, and wont make that mistake again, have learned WHAT NOT TO DO! and become set in their minds too ! Some for right and some for wrong , but now dating is complicated, for so many are set in their ways, This is EXACTLY what my point of this post to see, and share, how many are not even dating material, But still on here, so millions are here but only hundreds are open enough to be good dating material.
But being so open-minded that your Brains drop out ain't the answer either.Then the ones that do change, and wont make that mistake again, have learned WHAT NOT TO DO! and become set in their minds too ! Some for right and some for wrong , but now dating is complicated, for so many are set in their ways, This is EXACTLY what my point of this post to see, and share, how many are not even dating material, But still on here, so millions are here but only hundreds are open enough to be good dating material.
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Conrad73:
But being so open-minded that your Brains drop out ain't the answer either.
But being so open-minded that your Brains drop out ain't the answer either.
Wow what a point
maybe mine is still on the floor, 
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Tater: I already feel that I'm incompatible sometimes...I'm only 30... I think the wiser a man gets the more we realize, alot of the women out there, aren't worth giving up our peace of mind for... But there are some
I put that last bit in there so the ladies don't try and kill me now...
so
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....
I put that last bit in there so the ladies don't try and kill me now...
so
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....
Women do things that can drive a man insane and Men can do things that can drive a woman insane.
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I believe that you have to be open to, at the very least, investigating something new and different. Maybe I haven't found my perfect match, because I have limited myself too much.
I would consider dating a smoker, as long as he smokes outside and is willing to brush his teeth or use mouth wash after smoking. I find there is nothing worse than kissing a smoker who does not take care of his breath, as I have no disire to lick or kiss an ashtray. I have health problems that are affected by second hand smoke.
I would consider dating a smoker, as long as he smokes outside and is willing to brush his teeth or use mouth wash after smoking. I find there is nothing worse than kissing a smoker who does not take care of his breath, as I have no disire to lick or kiss an ashtray. I have health problems that are affected by second hand smoke.
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Crystalpistol2: Women do things that can drive a man insane and Men can do things that can drive a woman insane.
Wow you said that well, It would have taken me a whole page to get all that worded right, GOOD POST
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Crystalpistol2: I believe that you have to be open to, at the very least, investigating something new and different. Maybe I haven't found my perfect match, because I have limited myself too much.
I would consider dating a smoker, as long as he smokes outside and is willing to brush his teeth or use mouth wash after smoking. I find there is nothing worse than kissing a smoker who does not take care of his breath, as I have no disire to lick or kiss an ashtray. I have health problems that are affected by second hand smoke.
I would consider dating a smoker, as long as he smokes outside and is willing to brush his teeth or use mouth wash after smoking. I find there is nothing worse than kissing a smoker who does not take care of his breath, as I have no disire to lick or kiss an ashtray. I have health problems that are affected by second hand smoke.
This is a very good post too! As we ALL put up posted signs in our lives and then we dont have any trespassers anymore we wonder why ??????
All saying : Iwont do this , i wont do that , i wont settle for this , i wont move for nobody, and most of it it written in our profiles OUCH, Then we wonder why all these people look at our profile and RUN, We must search our thinking and become more accessable as the older generations is CLOSED, When you go to the store to shop if the door says CLOSED , we go to the next Store,
Maybe we should stay open once in a while and maybe someone would stop and shop!
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And now, the end is near;
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!
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HJFinAZ: And now, the end is near;
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!
What a great way to post it HJ Brought out a tear or 2
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HJFinAZ: And now, the end is near;
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!
Those word would define the life i have live as well
I am getting older, wiser, made my mistakes """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" and now looking more for the right way!!!! NOT JUST MY WAY!!!
I have found many answers, and learing from them has sure Changed MY WAY of thinking. Thats when we start to feel Maturity
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When you were younger you had less experience and less expectations. As we grow up and experience more relationships - we start to see that there are many characteristics of an individual we can tolerate and thus be bothered by.
The hurt - we can generally brush off, but, we move about with caution and make sure the next person doesnt hurt us the same way. A new type of hurt adds to the list of what to be cautioned with. The more experience, the more we can identify the red flags.
The lonely - we feel temporarily, or until we realize we're not happy with ourselves. Then we find ourselves, become happy with ourselves and await to be a wonderful companion to the one who finds us and that we're attracted to.
The settle for less - is actually a question of if we're able to compromise. We have it in our minds that we wont accept certain things - but, if that person had most of everything else we're looking for - we actually can settle, possibly with a hope of "change" in mind.
Your smoking example is a perfect example of change: I dated someone that smoked. I didn't at the time but, used to many years ago. I unfortunately picked up the habit while with him, but, kept it to about 2 cigarettes a day. Good man, good heart...but, then something was uncovered - he was a closet alcoholic and I broke up with him. When someone slurs and can't walk day after day...there's a bigger problem than the alcohol. He didn't want help. Would I compromise on having "that" situation around my kids and for the rest of my life? No.
Smoking is a habit that anyone can change. You can start it up or completely quit. No one should actually change anyone, but, if the person can reason with logic, that smoking shortens the life expectancy with you as their partner...wouldn't you consider that change with how much love they want to have with you long term?
It just really depends on who's also an accepting person and who is a compromising person.
Becoming incompatible is a rarity. You would have to enclose yourself and avoid the world. Unlearn everything you've learned. I don't think that's in your nature, as you're here asking for advice. Be patient. She's closer than you think. Or try another dating site, sometimes a temporary change of environment helps.
If you need a few recommendations - I can give them to you off forum.
The hurt - we can generally brush off, but, we move about with caution and make sure the next person doesnt hurt us the same way. A new type of hurt adds to the list of what to be cautioned with. The more experience, the more we can identify the red flags.
The lonely - we feel temporarily, or until we realize we're not happy with ourselves. Then we find ourselves, become happy with ourselves and await to be a wonderful companion to the one who finds us and that we're attracted to.
The settle for less - is actually a question of if we're able to compromise. We have it in our minds that we wont accept certain things - but, if that person had most of everything else we're looking for - we actually can settle, possibly with a hope of "change" in mind.
Your smoking example is a perfect example of change: I dated someone that smoked. I didn't at the time but, used to many years ago. I unfortunately picked up the habit while with him, but, kept it to about 2 cigarettes a day. Good man, good heart...but, then something was uncovered - he was a closet alcoholic and I broke up with him. When someone slurs and can't walk day after day...there's a bigger problem than the alcohol. He didn't want help. Would I compromise on having "that" situation around my kids and for the rest of my life? No.
Smoking is a habit that anyone can change. You can start it up or completely quit. No one should actually change anyone, but, if the person can reason with logic, that smoking shortens the life expectancy with you as their partner...wouldn't you consider that change with how much love they want to have with you long term?
It just really depends on who's also an accepting person and who is a compromising person.
Becoming incompatible is a rarity. You would have to enclose yourself and avoid the world. Unlearn everything you've learned. I don't think that's in your nature, as you're here asking for advice. Be patient. She's closer than you think. Or try another dating site, sometimes a temporary change of environment helps.
If you need a few recommendations - I can give them to you off forum.
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cinnamongyrl: When you were younger you had less experience and less expectations. As we grow up and experience more relationships - we start to see that there are many characteristics of an individual we can tolerate and thus be bothered by.
The hurt - we can generally brush off, but, we move about with caution and make sure the next person doesnt hurt us the same way. A new type of hurt adds to the list of what to be cautioned with. The more experience, the more we can identify the red flags.
The lonely - we feel temporarily, or until we realize we're not happy with ourselves. Then we find ourselves, become happy with ourselves and await to be a wonderful companion to the one who finds us and that we're attracted to.
The settle for less - is actually a question of if we're able to compromise. We have it in our minds that we wont accept certain things - but, if that person had most of everything else we're looking for - we actually can settle, possibly with a hope of "change" in mind.
Your smoking example is a perfect example of change: I dated someone that smoked. I didn't at the time but, used to many years ago. I unfortunately picked up the habit while with him, but, kept it to about 2 cigarettes a day. Good man, good heart...but, then something was uncovered - he was a closet alcoholic and I broke up with him. When someone slurs and can't walk day after day...there's a bigger problem than the alcohol. He didn't want help. Would I compromise on having "that" situation around my kids and for the rest of my life? No.
Smoking is a habit that anyone can change. You can start it up or completely quit. No one should actually change anyone, but, if the person can reason with logic, that smoking shortens the life expectancy with you as their partner...wouldn't you consider that change with how much love they want to have with you long term?
It just really depends on who's also an accepting person and who is a compromising person.
Becoming incompatible is a rarity. You would have to enclose yourself and avoid the world. Unlearn everything you've learned. I don't think that's in your nature, as you're here asking for advice. Be patient. She's closer than you think. Or try another dating site, sometimes a temporary change of environment helps.
If you need a few recommendations - I can give them to you off forum.
The hurt - we can generally brush off, but, we move about with caution and make sure the next person doesnt hurt us the same way. A new type of hurt adds to the list of what to be cautioned with. The more experience, the more we can identify the red flags.
The lonely - we feel temporarily, or until we realize we're not happy with ourselves. Then we find ourselves, become happy with ourselves and await to be a wonderful companion to the one who finds us and that we're attracted to.
The settle for less - is actually a question of if we're able to compromise. We have it in our minds that we wont accept certain things - but, if that person had most of everything else we're looking for - we actually can settle, possibly with a hope of "change" in mind.
Your smoking example is a perfect example of change: I dated someone that smoked. I didn't at the time but, used to many years ago. I unfortunately picked up the habit while with him, but, kept it to about 2 cigarettes a day. Good man, good heart...but, then something was uncovered - he was a closet alcoholic and I broke up with him. When someone slurs and can't walk day after day...there's a bigger problem than the alcohol. He didn't want help. Would I compromise on having "that" situation around my kids and for the rest of my life? No.
Smoking is a habit that anyone can change. You can start it up or completely quit. No one should actually change anyone, but, if the person can reason with logic, that smoking shortens the life expectancy with you as their partner...wouldn't you consider that change with how much love they want to have with you long term?
It just really depends on who's also an accepting person and who is a compromising person.
Becoming incompatible is a rarity. You would have to enclose yourself and avoid the world. Unlearn everything you've learned. I don't think that's in your nature, as you're here asking for advice. Be patient. She's closer than you think. Or try another dating site, sometimes a temporary change of environment helps.
If you need a few recommendations - I can give them to you off forum.
That was a very GOOD post and in detail
Yes i am open to answers as well, but the reason i posted this wasnt just for Me to see, BUT ALL TO SEE!!!!! How we are LIMITED in our search by our past experiences, habbits, and knowledge, and it IS AN EYE OPENER
Thanks hotrod
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Jan1305: Funny but utter rubbish! You were joking mercedes?
I know many women like me who have changed career, lifestyle, country of residence...and, in their late thirties, forties and fifties. We are fabulous, confident women and not many men would have the guts to do the same.
I know many women like me who have changed career, lifestyle, country of residence...and, in their late thirties, forties and fifties. We are fabulous, confident women and not many men would have the guts to do the same.
No i agree ! so many wont but just to let you know that a few do , and that is the ones you should be seeking to find your Dream
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HotrodLarrys: This is a very good post too! As we ALL put up posted signs in our lives and then we dont have any trespassers anymore we wonder why ?????? All saying : Iwont do this , i wont do that , i wont settle for this , i wont move for nobody, and most of it it written in our profiles OUCH, Then we wonder why all these people look at our profile and RUN, We must search our thinking and become more accessable as the older generations is CLOSED,
When you go to the store to shop if the door says CLOSED , we go to the next Store, Maybe we should stay open once in a while and maybe someone would stop and shop!
When you go to the store to shop if the door says CLOSED , we go to the next Store, Maybe we should stay open once in a while and maybe someone would stop and shop!
Just thought this is a good discussion so i posted again,
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I think you missed my point here. In the states this happens alot. Women now find themselves alone and having to do something with their lives. It is not that she is a victim, but she has found herself in a new set of circumstances and changes need to be made.