Knenagh, yeah I'm happy being on my own at the moment, until I find one who can change my mind I guess
Ken, I think at the end of the day we will choose to do things we can afford to live the consequences with. None is easier than the other. Being committed (exclusively) is not easy as well as being in an open (committed) one (I think open relationship is also a commitment). Each has its consequences.
Vivian, agree with everything you said. That’s what I told my ex when he said in a year we only spent less than 3 months together but those 3 months together 24/7 was I think more intensive than any other relationship as we really made the best of our time because we knew we did not meet often. But I don’t know about not having it again, some part of me want to prove him wrong about distance does not suit us as I believe it is not the distance, it is how strong your love is that you are willing to do it and make it work. But I know doing something to prove something to someone else is wrong. But we never know what the future bring, I told my self I don’t dig long distance relationship, then he came… sometimes we are given what we thought we don’t want so we learn ?
Ed, my brother! You are always welcome to email me in person. Nice to see you around her. By the way my yahoo account is no longer in use, I forget the password, so write me here. Looking forward to it.
Bunbun, I can’t promise anything as heart sometimes has its own logic and will, and people change (for better or worse). I mean should we try again, then I know what to do and don’t but for the time being, I guess no.
Hi goodtime, thank you for stopping by and share your opinion. I agree with you except no 3. Because in my case, in the end when you really have let go, in fact you can be friend again. I mean whatever has happened we’re talking about someone we once love, you can’t just throw away people in your life like that. Whatever bad thing he has done, he also once bring joy and made you happy. It takes time to forgive and forget and let go, but when you do, then you don’t have to erase someone from your life. I become family with my ex, after sometimes, because in the end he realizes his fault and apology, and also because we have a son to raise together.
Knenagh, Nidi, thank you for your opinion and support, I really appreciate it. Fiuh it helps after throwing here what I have in mind. I'm more relieved now :)
Minerva, about commitment I have known it from teh very first time we met. Marriage is not in his dictionary, he told me when we first met. He never said "Love" except accidentally when he said he was excited to have someone he love on his birthday. I think he was really careful about that. But yeah, I forgive him, and now trying to forget him, God know how difficult as he keeps popping with his "I miss you" message.
Knenagh, last week I told him "I knew what I want, I also knew what I need. And now I will focus on what I need to do than chasing what I want". I hope he got the message.
Hi vyoleta, I can't say whether it works or not. In my case it did not, but I have some friends who has been in LDR and they make it, some still there after years, some finally got married.
Knenagh, honestly no. That's why I told him to let me go, set me free, instead of keeps telling me he missed me. Last 2 days ago he did again, he said sorry I shouldn't have said that but he could not help it. I did not reply. Though I still cried :( It takes time, and I will take my time :)
Nidi, well I think he is confused, because if I did not talk to him for days, then he would send me message saying he misses me. But let him be confused, last thing I want to be is with someone who does not know what he wants.
Knenagh, I don't think that's the case in mine since I am freelance and can work from anywhere, that's why I am willing to move to him. But maybe he was afraid, of what if it did not work. Maybe he was afraid of having to feel responsible for my move. I don't know. What I see now is if he does not want it then it would never work. If he is now willing to try, then he is not wort fighting for.
What I still don;t understand, couple of weeks ago he said "Please don't do, I need you, I want you in my life." to which I replied "I am not a thing you could keep in a drawer because you don't want me now, and later you could take when you need me. This is a feeling and relationship, either you nourish and maintain it so it grows, or ignore and it will die." I don't know if he got what I mean or not. I just don't understand he could say "I need a break" and "Please don't go, I need you, I want you in my life" at the same time. It just does not make any sense. Don't you think?
Hi Joy, mixed feeling to be honest. Disappointed, yes. Hurt, yes. But lately also relieved. I mean I would not fight for someone who is not worth it. He gave up on us, and that made him not worth it. But heart has its own will, my head told me to forget him, my heart still miss him. But I am trying to tell my self that I might miss us, the way I felt when we were together, but as he changed, us is no longer exist and that I should let go and move forward.
I know, easier said than done, especially when he keeps popping up saying I miss you, or I believe we will have our time but not now, or whatever who in an instant could melt me all over again.
Ken, that's what I told him, but he insisted and made me believe it would work. So when he said it's not working, it kinda hurt...
Joy, thank you for your encouragement. It was not easy as I have had several LDR and have told my self, ok, not again. But sometimes, life gave us what we thought we don't want, maybe to learn more or to have enough :)
Dear all, I believe it's not the distance, because I offer him to move with him but he did not respond to that... we both agreed on what went wrong, what we did and what we were supposed to do, but while I choose to fix it, he choosed to end it. It's not fair, but life is never does, doesn't it?
Hi Knenagh, I agree with you. I don't really believe in forever too, and I think what matter is how you create good times in the present, so even when you have to end it, you two will have good things to remember. Life is a long journey in which you will meet some people along the way, where at some point you might end up going in a different way... you might meet the same person later, or meet someone new, you never know.
Hi James, Agree with you, this time I'd like to be found :)
Fury, Just believe something better will happen, I know talk is cheap, and it is easier said than done but I think that's the only way to deal with it :)
Thanks Knenagh, wish you a great traveling experience too. I was lucky enough to stay with local, tried their home made cook and cook them mine. A good trade, fun and enjoyable :)
Nicefeet, yes this is me, and thank you for the compliment
Hi Knenagh, are you in Ireland or Germany now? If it is Ireland, i can not go there, will need another visa. But if Germany, maybe I can fly and meet you, would love to actually meet you and share some stories
Hi Smartass, I don't want just find someone online. I want one from the blogs because I feel safer, and maybe we will have something to talk about as we may have "met" in blogs, or know someone from blogs, etc.
Hi Solamente, I agree with you. I like hanging out with locals when I travel, and this blogs is actually a good way to make friends and meet when you travel.
Dear all, gosh so many comments, thank you for sharing your thoughts and idea, I really appreciate it. I was out running here and there preparing some documents, and now just taking a break to have lunch and wow so many comments, different opinions, I will read all of them once I have time later in the evening.
Anyway, I don't expect a perfect grammar or punctuation, just a simple comma or full stop, to make it easier for me to read. I run out of breath reading long messages all on one sentence lol
I'm not native either, but I try to write a proper sentence. I mean it's one way to respect one I send message to. And this is a dating site, aren't you suppose to make effort to get one's attention? So don't rush, spend time thinking what you want to write, read again before sending it, well unless it's a generic message you send to tons of people lol
Have a good day everyone, gotta get back to work again. A month from now we're having a big holiday and usually before that people in creative industry like me will have to work double as when it is holiday season, TV still on and their program must be produced before everyone taking holiday.
123, so what language do you use daily? French? Maybe you can give suggestion too, I mean in general when you write, do you think punctuation and grammar is important? I mean basically in every language, do you think writing 10 lines without any comma or full stop is ok?
sarasvathy Blog Comments (705)
It's been a while
Namaron, thank you to remember me :)Ed, my brother! They say smile is the best disguise. They're right ;) Good to see you again