What's the alternative, swearing off relationships all-together? Perhaps the only thing we can do is learn from our past relationships, try not to repeat the mistakes we've made previously and try again.
Although sometimes what's needed is a period for introspection before we can we can look outward again. If your asking questions like the one above perhaps that's what you're going through at the moment. I can certainly relate to that....
The slow loris's adorable appearance is this case has been there downfall. There has been such a huge illegal trade in them as pets that there now almost extinct.
I had one, worked fine as long as I didn't drink, after a few pints I would be 'gimme that cancer death-stick'. Solved the issue by not going out on the lash and going to gym instead. It's been two months since my last cigarette. If I go out to the pub sometime, which I will around xmas I'll let you know how it goes.
The patches are useful for the first few days - but Paul Mckenna's Hypnotism CDs worked quite well for me.
I've been on'em and off'em for about a year and for me staying out of the pub has been the thing that really did it for me.
I have to admit I don't really have any fashion sense either - I mean I'll make an effort for a night out or a special occasion but most of the time it's jeans, t-shirt, jumper/hoodie.
I really think that if Gok came to Ireland he'd have a field day.
So this is one of my generalizations I've come up with recently.
I joined a gym a couple of months ago and I've been going regularly and eating a fairly strict diet in an effort to get in better shape. I have no illusions about my main motivation here - I want to make myself more desirable to women. The health benefits are great also but I know it's really vanity at the end of the day.
Although recently I've been wondering if I'm placing to much emphasis on this. And the reason why is this.
At the gym I go to guys outnumber the girls about 2 to 1 and only a minority of the women that go train regularly or with any intensity. Now I reckon that a lot of the guys have the same motivation as me, but the women I can't speak for. I have no sisters - Womens motivations are a total mystery to me a lot of the time.
It got me thinking, what do women tend get really into that men in general aren't bothered with or do half-heartedly- Style and Fashion.
Now I could be wrong here- cue protests from fahionistas who will tell me fashion is a higher art form - but a lot of womens fashion, style and beauty stuff is motivated by vanity and wanting to appear desirable. Just the same as Men and working out. I'm sure there's some competitive thing that goes on with women and fashion but I'm mostly oblivious to and there certainly also a competitive element in working out whether it's with yourself or someone else.
And so, in general "Women care as much about body and physique as men care about style and fashion"
Could both Men and Women be collectively misguided about what the opposite gender care more about? Feel free to chime in with your 2c and answer to any of these questions below.
Women of CS. What is a bigger turn on - A man who is stylish and dresses with impeccable taste or a the man in a vest who is obviously toned and in great shape? (fashion people hate vests for some reason)
Men of CS. What is a bigger turn on - A woman in a vest who is obviously toned and in great shape or the woman who is stylish and dresses with impeccable taste?
I would also love to hear from women who train hard and often, what motivates them? and whether they feel that this interest is something a lot of women can't relate to? And if you're a fella who has a passion for fashion - Does it not bother you that the majority of men either don't care or don't have a bull's notion how dress with style?
I think the CS is good because of the on-line community, you can get slightly addicted to the forums and this is something that a lot of the other dating sites lack.
I had a look at your profile I don't think you doing anything wrong per-se. Maybe adding a good picture of yourself where you can see your eyes properly wouldn't hurt. I don't know how women feel about this but when I see a lady's profile and here eyes are hidden or it's a fuzzy out of focus picture I get this feeling there hiding something.
That said, I've been on this site and not had a date out of it. Still post stuff on the forums though.
I'd like to second what the others have said about dolans, the library, cobblestone joe's and the office- all are good for live music.
Smith's is alright too, they usually have decent drink offers on, the Icon above it is big, but it is your standard, run of the mill nightclub.
Costelloes, Dominic Street is a good late bar/nightclub as long as you don't mind sticky carpets. But it is different compared to the other places open late in limerick, because downstairs in the pub part you are able to hold a conversation without shouting in the other person's ear and it stays open till 2.30 - 3am on a weekend.
I would also like to add the Mickey Martin's up on Augustine Lane is a cool bar and if it's a warm, dry, summer's evening the locke bar on king's island by the canal is great craic.
Some prople have gone off on a tangent here offering advice ranging from how to drink responsibly to hangover cures. Maybe that's what the OP wanted, but I'm just going to answer her question.
Yes, when I over-indulge with drink I normally feel a bit down the next day. Because;
1) The money I spent on drink the night before I could have not spent and saved for other things.
2) Hangovers are rotten. - And yes, I know plenty of good cures, but generally once you're minging, you're minging.
3) Hangovers are a waste of a day.
4) Generally the night before goes something like this, plan to head back at a sensible time, after a few change my mind, before I know it I'm heading towards late bar/club & full of dutch courage thinking I could meet a nice lady and we would both be attracted to one other. I guess that's a really good example of how alcohol effects your judgement, because out of all the times i've gone out on the drink this has only happened a handful of times.
Yes, that dissappointed feeling of waking up alone with a minging hangover is very depressing.
Now, from time to time I have woken up, hungover and had a text message or telephone number from someone I like on my phone. Then I don't feel depressed.
P.S. Please don't offer me advice on drinking habits, I'm on a healthy trip at the moment - I'm off ciggies & junk food, not going out binge drinking, going to the gym regularly and plan to continue doing so for the next six months at least.
Yes but like that Steve Jobs in that Southpark episode with the Human Cent-iPad
"Why won't it read?"
Obviously not including you, unlaoised, or any of the other literate people who bothered to read and comprehend the facebook T&C's. However I'm sure when the aliens finally land on earth, all humans life extinct through stupidity the visitors will unearth the Facebook data-centre and come to the conclusion that it was a global tool for the voluntary confession of your crimes or social misdemeanours.
I have to admit there's a lot about his writing that I agree with, and a lot of his work is really motivational. I really liked his piece on dealing with depression.
However I'm sceptical of some of his ideas about relationships.
Don't get me wrong a lot of his advice is really solid. Marriage - yep, doesn't make sense for a man to marry unless he wants to start a family. Men taking the lead - yep, women like a man who can lead successfully and apply that to a relationship. She must be young - yes and no, this a a gross generalization and while a relationship where the man is older and the woman younger is more likely to last but what victor doesn't know/or left out is that the same study that concluded this also concluded that the woman must be more intelligent than the older man in order for this to be true.
But the following:
Being from a broken home means you can't have a successful relationship. -As discussed earlier.
Women are only going to be happy and fulfilled if they have and raise children. What if they can't have children or don't want children does that mean they are destined to be unhappy or fulfilled?
She must have the body type you prefer/ be image conscious. Ok, so this is true but he automatically assumes that every man is going want a similar body type. What if the fella likes plus sized ladies? Or maybe he likes them size zero?
But perhaps the biggest scepticism I have come from two things -
His tone.
He sometimes comes across as quite hostile towards women in some of his writing - Did a former partner seriously hurt him through betrayal? Does his mean his advice is slightly biased? Or has he just very clever identified that a large amount of his target audience (men who are unhappy with their bodies, relationships or lack there-of) feel hostility towards women. In which case he's just doing it to sell copies of his book and maybe harness some of that negative emotional energy as use a motivation for his readers.
Another piece he wrote advised men to be selfish in a relationship in order to keep his woman interested.
I can see what he's getting at but I think he probably went a bit to far and it maybe even contradicts some of his other ideals like..
Men should be the leaders Correct me if I'm wrong but a good leader has to take what everybody wants onboard, know that the the buck stops with him, sometimes has to make the tough calls but ultimately has the good of the group (or in this case family or couple) at heart. I can't see how this could be accomplished through being selfish.
Mind you I've never tested his theory about selfishness so I could test it.
Yeah it's great for that- but so many people don't realize that what they post on facebook no longer belongs to them. Also machines record everything. It doesn't matter if you put up the most boring pictures and uninteresting status updates in the world it's recorded and facebook decide who can see it and how much it is worth.
Not really that suprised that a government agency was surveying everything on facebook. In fact back 2010/2011 facebook changed their policy regarding the privacy of their users information to what boils down to; users are responsible for what they post on facebook but facebook still have the rights to it. Essentially privacy settings on facebook are an oxy-moron.
I've only met a few women who are without children say that they didn't like/want children. I think some women get to a point in their lives where they think that they're too old to raise children and don't want to take the health risks involved with having children at an older age. For some they've said they don't want the responsibility and others have just outright admitted that they value their freedom too much or admitted that they're too selfish.
The other thing you've got to consider is that IMHO it has only really become socially acceptable for a woman to admit that they don't want children in the last 20 years or so.
And then there is the whole environmental/social conscience argument. Stay with me on this one it's a bit off the wall...
Sir David Attenborough was recently asked a question about his thoughts on the declining badger population in Britain and his answer was...
"Who cares about the badger population. I'm more concerned about the increase of the human population."
If the human population continues to grow at it's current rate in the next 100 years the planet will not be able to produce enough food to feed everyone.
One other thing you have to consider is the fact that the birth rate is always lower in more developed societies than it is in comparison less developed societies. I've often wondered if this pattern might be natures way of curbing population growth rate as people live longer healthier lives due to medical knowledge and education.
Before a court can grant a divorce, the following conditions must be met:
The parties must have been living apart from one another for a period amounting to four out of the previous five years before the application is made.
There must be no reasonable prospect of reconciliation.
Proper arrangements must have been made or will be made for the spouse and any dependent members of the family such as children of either party and other relatives.
I've not answered the poll because what a woman means when she says this it is less about the actually words and more about her tone and the way she says it.
I will however say this.
The word 'seem' leaves uncertainty i.e.
"You seem like a really nice guy" is no-where near as positive as "You're a really nice guy".
Such a small difference in language but such a big difference in meaning.
Although if a woman says, "You're a really great guy" Bazinga!
I think this site is the best for meeting people online, and seems to have a bit more of community around it, and one that is more global and culturally diverse. You end up making more relationships online than you do ITRW on connecting singles.
However I think that there are other sites that are better for actually meeting people than this one.
I think Obama wants to end America's dependence on oil and what better way than doing that by driving up the price of it through scarcity.
I don't think that oil is really worth fighting over and within in my own lifetime expect electric cars to become the norm, electric aircraft to be used for short haul flights, and the first nuclear fusion power plant to become economically viable. In short the internal combustion engine will head the way of the steam engine.
The one thing that Obama means "no boots on the ground" is that this military action is predict going to be another demonstration of Americas prowess in in technology. It won't just be the their advanced stealth fighter/bombers like the F22 that will be shown off. I expect UCAV like the X-47b and Excalibur and the Swords program will play a much more significant role here. I think Obama is going to approach this conflict with the aim of to not lose one American life to it.
As far as the Israel being weak- they have one of the best trained and equipped military forces in the world and lets not forget that about half of the population in Israel have served in it. Anyone who invades it is going to have their work cut out.
But America's most powerful weapon - is cultural and social reform, the ideals of democracy, liberty and freedom which caused a spate of revolutions in eastern Europe in the late 80's/early 90's are now the same thing that are driving the Arab Spring movement- Tunisia, Egypt, Yemen and Libya.
I realize that all of this makes me sound pro-american and pro-war but believe me I'm not, I just think that this conflict is going to vastly unmatched, short and something of PR exercise for america's military and technology.
dateadave Forum Posts (95)
RE: Attraction
What's the alternative, swearing off relationships all-together?Perhaps the only thing we can do is learn from our past relationships, try not to repeat the mistakes we've made previously and try again.
Although sometimes what's needed is a period for introspection before we can we can look outward again. If your asking questions like the one above perhaps that's what you're going through at the moment. I can certainly relate to that....