I was made redundant in London last May and my ltr ended in October as I was holidaying in my native malta, may I add 12 years ended on the phone. I've been out of a job since last October cause I've got high flying experience and am overqualified. It's getting all too much to cope with. I can't afford to go out and cs is a great way of meeting people but I've met mostly weirdos in real life from this site. I just wish I had a magic wand to make everything right. The only groups Ii know of are for divorced people and I presume they'd be older than me. I'm also risking losing my property because never having married my ex I'm not owed any maintenance money. I'm eager to find work and a man to share my life with but for the past eight months feels like I haven't lived and frankly I don't know if I believe in love any more thansk to the selfish behaviour of my ex and other exes before him. I'm happy to get the job first and if need be close the chapter on men. I refuse to dress up like a tart and go clubbing competing with girls young enough to be my daughters. Sorry about the rant. It's just that life has been tough recently and I keep hoping it won't be like this forever.
I enjoy meeting new people. In the process I am making friends but not enough to have a busy social life. In the meantime I'm stuck indoors a lot, though I could change that by spending less time at my computer and more out and about doing things on my own until I get used to being on my own again.
Up to 8 months ago I was in a 12 year LTR and I have to admit I can't adjust to being single. It's very lonely and I do worry that the rest of my life might be like this. Some people can do single life. I can't. I love being in a relationship.
I am not leaving my search to fate. I'm very proactive on CS and got lots of dates but the issue is quality not quantity. I'd rather meet one man that's right for me than loads that are wrong.
I don't go out much except for coffees with friends. I've done the clubbing in my 20s and now am interested in one on one conversation. The only men I meet are on CS and so far I haven't met anyone suitable. I've compromised on education as I've met men who have life experience instead and the reason my ltr failed was he was too much of an intellectual, too mush into books and absorbed in his own world. However, although I'm not looking for a model, I'm looking for someone with whom there is chemistry. He needn't be a looker. It's happened in the past. I've been single again for 8 months and am close to giving up. I've dated extensively and either it stops at a first date or there is total incompatibility. Any encouraging stories of people who found a good match via CS when they were in their late thirties. I know some would say I'm young but it just feels like there's nobody suitable out there unless I accept an alcoholic, or a good looking man who bores the pants out of me (had that in my ltr).
Should I start going out more? I have few friends as I've only recently returned to my native country. I don't think I expect much, just somebody whose company I enjoy and with a bit of a spark. I am not excluding long distance either.
the tragedy is he's flying over. If there's no chemistry or character compatibility I still have to spend five days with him, before I can move on! I've even taken time off work.
I tend not to disect it.....if I made a mistake then I made a mistake....have to
I've actually surprised myself. Accepted the end gracefully. things weren't working. I tried hard to find a solution. He wouldn't compromise. After 12 years I don't think of him anymore we're not in touch but he's the one with regrets he says. maybe because he didn't treat me right. Now I lead a boring single life mostly stay at home, living virtually without many friends in real life but I'm happy to be free to be me without someone trying to mould me. The price to pay for freedom. No regrets.
Hmm...men are different. Last guy I was involved with, we'd e-mail non stop, then he sent me a photo and I felt like standing him up, except when we met I enjoyed his company and before I knew it within one month I was really into him. chemistry for me isn't instant. True there has to be that something about a man but personality can make someone ordinary highly attractive.
disagree with you there. I'm 37, recently broke up after a 12 year live in relationship. I had boyfriends before him and am dating now. I'm as honest as they get and no different from a divorced woman except I never had kids out of choice. I don't think that implies there's anything wrong with me.
I'm not thinking that far. For the time being I'm happy to be home. Then we'll see! England to Malta is quite cheap that's why he could afford to visit so soon, checking me out as it were and vice-versa.!
Maybe I should clarify. he's flying over to meet me as we live in different countries. So whether we end up liking each other or not I still have my tour guide duties to do and will be spending five days with him!
I've met a man on cs. Only known each other for two weeks and he's visiting me next week. I'm excited yet scared that in real life we won't get along or there'll be no chemistry. Any experiences in this department? Why am I thinking the worst?
Do you find that men under 40 tend to specify what physical appearance they desire of a woman in the looking for section, whereas older men are more open to what they might find?
Because if you're single and looking, you join a singles site hoping to meet singles, not to come across potential profiles you might like and then read that they're in a relationship or worse they don't say but actually are. Selfishly I want all people on here to be single as statistically that increases the prospects. Also this site can be a refuge for single people and it is kind of upsetting seeing coupled up people on here. There's got to be some place in the world where you don't bump into married people or don't see them everywhere to remind you of what you no longer have.
missingLondon Forum Posts (455)
Will I ever meet a suitable man ?
Sorry to hear about your losses. My condolences