Ladies: Would you date a "separated" man or would you wait until the divorce is finalised? (215)
g33kgurl: OMG OMG OMG - yes, they HAVE been together for like 14 years or something epic like that! ugh..
now its my turn to say OMG OMG.seriously this man i know has been with his wife for 14 years
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evilcherryqueen: at least a YEAR after he's divorced. There's a certain grieving process that one needs to go through, then a self discovery period and depending on the person, sometimes it takes longer than that.
Separated = Married ..... no difference, they are still bound to another, no matter what they say.
Good luck to you
Separated = Married ..... no difference, they are still bound to another, no matter what they say.
Good luck to you
thanks cherryqueen... i did wonder why he's on a dating site when he's not yet divorced.. but then again.. maybe it was just testing the waters?? .. ..
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was just sorry the advice was as clear as mud!
noticed u r in Mel too, so if u wanna catch up for coffee and a real chat to discuss or just to call and talk feel free to hit me up by email for my contact details.....
helping others is what I do for a living
noticed u r in Mel too, so if u wanna catch up for coffee and a real chat to discuss or just to call and talk feel free to hit me up by email for my contact details.....
helping others is what I do for a living
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Vixstar: was just sorry the advice was as clear as mud!
noticed u r in Mel too, so if u wanna catch up for coffee and a real chat to discuss or just to call and talk feel free to hit me up by email for my contact details.....
helping others is what I do for a living
noticed u r in Mel too, so if u wanna catch up for coffee and a real chat to discuss or just to call and talk feel free to hit me up by email for my contact details.....
helping others is what I do for a living
Can I come too?
Love being helped........
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g33kgurl: thanks cherryqueen... i did wonder why he's on a dating site when he's not yet divorced.. but then again.. maybe it was just testing the waters?? .. ..
he's already in a relationship that's failing or has failed, the last thing he needs to do is "test the waters" at this point. There are more important things he needs to be doing at this point to make himself a better person and it doesn't involve chasing women. Run Hunni Run....
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gozoman2: Can I come too?
Love being helped........
Love being helped........
you sound like u r beyond help!
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evilcherryqueen: he's already in a relationship that's failing or has failed, the last thing he needs to do is "test the waters" at this point. There are more important things he needs to be doing at this point to make himself a better person and it doesn't involve chasing women. Run Hunni Run....
well..... he's saying he loves me....
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g33kgurl: well..... he's saying he loves me....
how long have u known him?
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Vixstar: was just sorry the advice was as clear as mud!
noticed u r in Mel too, so if u wanna catch up for coffee and a real chat to discuss or just to call and talk feel free to hit me up by email for my contact details.....
helping others is what I do for a living
noticed u r in Mel too, so if u wanna catch up for coffee and a real chat to discuss or just to call and talk feel free to hit me up by email for my contact details.....
helping others is what I do for a living
wow! really? kool.. definitely. will drop you an email!
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Vixstar: how long have u known him?
two months.. thereabouts.. but all up, we only caught up for say about 10 days..
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g33kgurl: two months.. thereabouts.. but all up, we only caught up for say about 10 days..
That sounds hauntingly familiar so I now have major alarm bells going off!!
It can happen for some, as have friends that it have worked for that quickly, but after my last experience I would be wary.....
be careful hun!
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Vixstar: That sounds hauntingly familiar so I now have major alarm bells going off!!
It can happen for some, as have friends that it have worked for that quickly, but after my last experience I would be wary.....
be careful hun!
It can happen for some, as have friends that it have worked for that quickly, but after my last experience I would be wary.....
be careful hun!
oh oh.....
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g33kgurl: oh oh.....
goin to bed now.. but will be back tomorrow.. sent you an email too! thanks all btw, so far, all advice have been pretty awesome! thanks again..
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g33kgurl: is it ok to date a separated man or are you better off waiting until the divorce is finalised?
No way would I day a man who is separated.
I've seen it too many times where men go back to their wives which is good if they can save their marriage, but that would leave me in a mess if I was in love with him.
And truthfully, I know this is going to sound old fashioned but, until you are divorced....you are married....and I don't go out with married men.
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I agree.
Some people can be separated for years, and be emotionally ready for a relationship.
Being separated is a status, like being single, divorced, widowed.
Some people can be separated for years, and be emotionally ready for a relationship.
Being separated is a status, like being single, divorced, widowed.
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I have one set of friends that knew they moment they met and a yr later got married and are still together :)
But with my experience - I thought my ex was cute when he proposed after 3mths, but now I see all the signals that indicated he was not emotionally or mentally ready despite being divorced 4yrs ago!
I thought he was the one at the time too.....
Hence my previous comments about seperation/divorce not really being the issue, but rather his mental/emotional state!
What does your gut say? If there is the slightest bit of doubt- listen to it!!
But with my experience - I thought my ex was cute when he proposed after 3mths, but now I see all the signals that indicated he was not emotionally or mentally ready despite being divorced 4yrs ago!
I thought he was the one at the time too.....
Hence my previous comments about seperation/divorce not really being the issue, but rather his mental/emotional state!
What does your gut say? If there is the slightest bit of doubt- listen to it!!
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being separated was like being a lepar to most women,,it is a time to test waters,,or was for me. I didnt see the harm in friendly dating,,if thats the intention. there were a few women who understood the situation, and were in it themselves,,,healing doesnt have to mean solitude
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Mercedes1: Dont wait for a damn thing
Those guys are full of crock
Those guys are full of crock
Welcome back Merc. Good to see you again.
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evilcherryqueen: he's already in a relationship that's failing or has failed, the last thing he needs to do is "test the waters" at this point. There are more important things he needs to be doing at this point to make himself a better person and it doesn't involve chasing women. Run Hunni Run....
So true Queen. There are many issue a soon to be divorced person has to deal with, otherwise they drag those issues with them into the next relationship. And why do you want to drag the new innocent person through a divorce with you?
However, the length of the seperation and the reasons for not divorcing may be factors to consider. But, for the most part, stay away.
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remember there are two sides to every story! and take huge pinch of salt with what either of them say! try not to get involved with their politics.....
how he handles himself around you and around her will also give another indicator.....there will be subtle signs!
sorry I cannot be clearer than that!
dont be sorry! any advice is good advice i reckon... thanks vix!