Ladies: Would you date a "separated" man or would you wait until the divorce is finalised? (215)
g33kgurl: parting with good money?
Last time I enquired, around £1200 was quoted.
------ This thread is Archived ------
bodleing: Last time I enquired, around £1200 was quoted.
quoted for what may i ask?
------ This thread is Archived ------
I think it depends on the people involved and their attitude about break ups... for myself I never end a relationship unless I know there is no hope, that things are truly over. There are other people who seem to break up and get back together on a weekly basis...
I guess I´m a bit surgical when it comes to ending a relationship... it´s over and done and there is no going back for me and I don´t carry any emotional baggage forward with me... so when I separated I was truly "single" except for the paper work.
I guess I´m a bit surgical when it comes to ending a relationship... it´s over and done and there is no going back for me and I don´t carry any emotional baggage forward with me... so when I separated I was truly "single" except for the paper work.
------ This thread is Archived ------
g33kgurl: is it ok to date a separated man or are you better off waiting until the divorce is finalised?
well I have been separated for 3 years and the divorce is being held up..i don't know how long, so do I sit forever before I start dating? I think it's ok as long as you are upfront about your situation and the other person knows and can make a decision. At my age, no one is in a big hurry to get married again anyway!. Mine is clear.There is zero chance of reconciliation.
------ This thread is Archived ------
I would like to begin dating.... but really have only just beguin the official process of the divorce.
I have been seperated for 2.5 years.
The only reason I need this little piece of paper is so he is free to remarry... I don't intend to marry again, and have no intention of ever wanting to be with him again.
As for the children - there are our five invoved... and now her three...
Life moves on....
I have been seperated for 2.5 years.
The only reason I need this little piece of paper is so he is free to remarry... I don't intend to marry again, and have no intention of ever wanting to be with him again.
As for the children - there are our five invoved... and now her three...
Life moves on....
------ This thread is Archived ------
bodleing: Well that is a matter for you and your conscience.
I personally would not dream of taking money
from my ywo son's mother's pocket.
I feel no ill will towards her, quite the contrary.
My sons and I would always help her should the need
arise, and that would remain the same whether we were
divorced or not.
Pieces of paper do not effect my feelings towards
a person. This is how I conduct my life, though
I understand not everyone sees things this way.
As for your last statement...
I havnt a clue what you're talking about.
I personally would not dream of taking money
from my ywo son's mother's pocket.
I feel no ill will towards her, quite the contrary.
My sons and I would always help her should the need
arise, and that would remain the same whether we were
divorced or not.
Pieces of paper do not effect my feelings towards
a person. This is how I conduct my life, though
I understand not everyone sees things this way.
As for your last statement...
I havnt a clue what you're talking about.
as for
Quote: "Pieces of paper do not effect my feelings towards a person. This is how I conduct my life, though
I understand not everyone sees things this way."
I think that many ppl see things this way.
But you can't blame them for wanting a clean cut. It's not possible for another person to know what is really behind that.
They have to invest a great deal of their time and their heart getting to know you to be certain that's how it is.
And considering that relationships are complicated as is, not many would.
------ This thread is Archived ------
"It ain't over...'till it's over!"
Yhey are not available in a legal sense, till the divorce is final. Any married person who dates with the intention of a romantic interest is cheating. Just MY opinion! And I believe the LAW is on my side.
Did I date while I was separated?? Hell, yes!! But I never said I was perfect!!
Yhey are not available in a legal sense, till the divorce is final. Any married person who dates with the intention of a romantic interest is cheating. Just MY opinion! And I believe the LAW is on my side.
Did I date while I was separated?? Hell, yes!! But I never said I was perfect!!
------ This thread is Archived ------
Each time this subject comes up there are, as to be expected, a range of opinions.
I have posted previously that in Ireland you have to be seperated 5 years before you can apply for a divorce and others have posted that Divorce is still not available in their Country.
So I would like to ask those who say that seperated is still married and no way would they date someone who wasnt divorced what they feel they would do if they were in either of these situations.
would you wait 5 years and get your divorce before dating?
would you not date at all if you couldnt get a divorce, and spend the rest of your life single?
I have posted previously that in Ireland you have to be seperated 5 years before you can apply for a divorce and others have posted that Divorce is still not available in their Country.
So I would like to ask those who say that seperated is still married and no way would they date someone who wasnt divorced what they feel they would do if they were in either of these situations.
would you wait 5 years and get your divorce before dating?
would you not date at all if you couldnt get a divorce, and spend the rest of your life single?
------ This thread is Archived ------
vonney: Each time this subject comes up there are, as to be expected, a range of opinions.
I have posted previously that in Ireland you have to be seperated 5 years before you can apply for a divorce and others have posted that Divorce is still not available in their Country.
So I would like to ask those who say that seperated is still married and no way would they date someone who wasnt divorced what they feel they would do if they were in either of these situations.
would you wait 5 years and get your divorce before dating?
would you not date at all if you couldnt get a divorce, and spend the rest of your life single?
I have posted previously that in Ireland you have to be seperated 5 years before you can apply for a divorce and others have posted that Divorce is still not available in their Country.
So I would like to ask those who say that seperated is still married and no way would they date someone who wasnt divorced what they feel they would do if they were in either of these situations.
would you wait 5 years and get your divorce before dating?
would you not date at all if you couldnt get a divorce, and spend the rest of your life single?
I think we know the answer to that one Vonney.
------ This thread is Archived ------
bodleing: I think we know the answer to that one Vonney.
Easy to answer when they arent actually your only options
------ This thread is Archived ------
pretzelman: "It ain't over...'till it's over!"
Yhey are not available in a legal sense, till the divorce is final. Any married person who dates with the intention of a romantic interest is cheating. Just MY opinion! And I believe the LAW is on my side.
Did I date while I was separated?? Hell, yes!! But I never said I was perfect!!
Yhey are not available in a legal sense, till the divorce is final. Any married person who dates with the intention of a romantic interest is cheating. Just MY opinion! And I believe the LAW is on my side.
Did I date while I was separated?? Hell, yes!! But I never said I was perfect!!
Legally speaking.....over here if one cheats during marriage it is considered grounds for separation....
...but once the court decrees separation, (in case of consensual situations such as mine the court accepts the contract of separation as presented by the parties), it is in effect stating that the two parties do not have any legal holding on each other any longer.
To this effect, any of the two having another partner is no longer considered as cause of dispute since separation has already occurred.
It is relative to note however, that should the separated couple actually go to bed together again, this could be legal ground by any of the two to instigate court proceedings to nullify any previous separation agreement.
That is how it stands in our country.
------ This thread is Archived ------
gozoman2: Legally speaking.....over here if one cheats during marriage it is considered grounds for separation....
...but once the court decrees separation, (in case of consensual situations such as mine the court accepts the contract of separation as presented by the parties), it is in effect stating that the two parties do not have any legal holding on each other any longer.
To this effect, any of the two having another partner is no longer considered as cause of dispute since separation has already occurred.
It is relative to note however, that should the separated couple actually go to bed together again, this could be legal ground by any of the two to instigate court proceedings to nullify any previous separation agreement.
That is how it stands in our country.
...but once the court decrees separation, (in case of consensual situations such as mine the court accepts the contract of separation as presented by the parties), it is in effect stating that the two parties do not have any legal holding on each other any longer.
To this effect, any of the two having another partner is no longer considered as cause of dispute since separation has already occurred.
It is relative to note however, that should the separated couple actually go to bed together again, this could be legal ground by any of the two to instigate court proceedings to nullify any previous separation agreement.
That is how it stands in our country.
Hmmmm...... so to keep the 'status quo' one has to stay well away from a separated wife - you mean, just like when normally married ?
Just joking! ------ This thread is Archived ------
You really need to wait for the man to be divorced. There is always the chance that he will reconsile with his wife and you dont want to get in the middle of that.------ This thread is Archived ------
Countrified: You really need to wait for the man to be divorced. There is always the chance that he will reconsile with his wife and you dont want to get in the middle of that.
I agree, for most countries when 'separated' doesn't have the same legal meaning as say here in Malta.
'Let no man set asunder' isn't just a religious thingy, it's a moral one - and where two people have a hope of reconciliation you should not get involved as you'll then not want them to be reconciled......... which is bound to cause huge personal grief if they do!
------ This thread is Archived ------
Countrified: You really need to wait for the man to be divorced. There is always the chance that he will reconsile with his wife and you dont want to get in the middle of that.
So, are you saying that an Irish man, or woman shouldnt date for 5 YEARS??
------ This thread is Archived ------
OK This is To All:
I have seen in way to many separations where after a while things happen, like see Ex and in the bedroom you go.Or +++++++++
Separation does not finalise a Marriage unless there's very bad blood between both parties in hand.
As for getting involved in with someone hows just separated your going to have to carry all their Baggage, and
I been with few women that were separated, Will never again burn my hands on fire go through that Efen Drama! A waist of time, Why You are the rebound of a long relationship. And 99% you will not last. So why bother?
Their are Men men Out there not just one!
I have seen in way to many separations where after a while things happen, like see Ex and in the bedroom you go.Or +++++++++
Separation does not finalise a Marriage unless there's very bad blood between both parties in hand.
As for getting involved in with someone hows just separated your going to have to carry all their Baggage, and
I been with few women that were separated, Will never again burn my hands on fire go through that Efen Drama! A waist of time, Why You are the rebound of a long relationship. And 99% you will not last. So why bother?Their are Men men Out there not just one!
------ This thread is Archived ------
Has anyone noticed the ads on this thread?
------ This thread is Archived ------
Countrified: You really need to wait for the man to be divorced. There is always the chance that he will reconsile with his wife and you dont want to get in the middle of that.
Just an opinion......but any reconciliation attempt would have been gone at before proceeding with separation no?
I mean over here, even when two people file for separation, the first move is that the court orders a reconciliation meeting between the lawyers and the parties to discuss the grounds for the call of separation.
In effect, can't remember the percentage, but over here there was a significant number of applications which were withdrawn since the parties reconciled when this maneuver was introduced in our courts.
Does not make any logic to go through separation to then reconcile considering the expenses involved in doing so.........my separation had cost me round Euro35,000........and that was fifteen odd years ago..........
------ This thread is Archived ------
nothernstar: OK This is To All:
I have seen in way to many separations where after a while things happen, like see Ex and in the bedroom you go.Or +++++++++
Separation does not finalise a Marriage unless there's very bad blood between both parties in hand.
As for getting involved in with someone hows just separated your going to have to carry all their Baggage, and I been with few women that were separated, Will never again burn my hands on fire go through that Efen Drama! A waist of time, Why You are the rebound of a long relationship. And 99% you will not last. So why bother? Their are Men men Out there not just one!
I have seen in way to many separations where after a while things happen, like see Ex and in the bedroom you go.Or +++++++++
Separation does not finalise a Marriage unless there's very bad blood between both parties in hand.
As for getting involved in with someone hows just separated your going to have to carry all their Baggage, and I been with few women that were separated, Will never again burn my hands on fire go through that Efen Drama! A waist of time, Why You are the rebound of a long relationship. And 99% you will not last. So why bother? Their are Men men Out there not just one!
Sorry, but I disagree.
I talk from an Irish point of view, as the legal separation period is for 5 years here.
Alot of people here want to divorce straight away, and their marriage is WELL AND TRULY OVER. Unfortunately, due to legal constraints, they are unable to divorce until 5 years have elapsed.
Are you honestly saying that person shouldnt date for 5 YEARS??
------ This thread is Archived ------
This Thread is Archived
This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.
« Go back to All Threads
« Go back to All Threads
More Threads
rarotonga
Icebergs Still Around
Don Shits-In-Pants!!!
Salami, Salami, Baloney
everything is changing
Reality Check
Nature
What I Lack In Vocabulary
1830's Music
How far is too far?
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
thanks ambrose. what made you think it was worth the risk at that time? how did you gauge whether or not she's really ready to move on? and not just on a rebound?