"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."
Lao-tzu
Non-attachment - even or especially to one's own self-image - is the necessity for personal change. If we are open to change and to new possibilities and perspectives, without buying into them blindly, we can grow.
In the mid sixties we started to hear strange and intriguing music fro the West Coast of the States. This was termed Progressive Music All went well for some years, the music spread to the UK and spawned many new bands. Unfortunately around the turn of the decade the term Prog Rock replaced the term Progressive Rock. Probably just coincidence, but the now Prog Rock bands climbed up their own a**hole with self indulgent never ending pieces of tedium and tried to fool us this was 'progressive'.
Like I said...thank god for the pistols...the dinosaurs were almost extinct!!!
"Be your own best friend and you will have a friend for life."
Harold Becker
Same for opponent and critic, or on the other hand supporter and listener... they stick with you. The reactive ego tends to be negative, the mindful presence to be positive. Which is the shadow of fearful others? And which is the true you?
"Nationalism is an infantile disease. It's the measles of humanity."
Albert Einstein:
The illusion is that your country defines who you are... or your company, your profession, your town, your team. The reality is that finding out who you are requires self-searching and self-knowledge. You are more than any identification.
"Almost all relationships of course are monogamous, but that has not always been the case. The demand for exclusivity in relationship clearly has it's roots in the infant's total dependence on the stability of the Other. This is the unconscious underpinning of the fascination of the Other, the search to recover the lost paradise of childhood, the original participation mystique with primary caregivers. As no popular culture has built itself upon the idea of romance more than 20th century America has, so none has founded it on more shifting ground. A necessary corollary then, is that no culture has more set itself up for disappointment than the one which seeks it's affirmation in projection, illusion and delusion."
James Hollis
True love is agape or sometimes oxymoronically called disinterested love. That is to be wholly invested in the well being of the Other...or others without the shadow of self interest lurking beneath the surface....some save this love for their god.
"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. Then we see they are perfect just as they are; like a flower, each one unique and special. Who would want such a person to be other than they are?"
Sam Keen:
We all want to receive love. But maybe it comes in a form you don't want - perhaps someone offers romantic love but that's not what you're looking for - or it doesn't come at all. Then there is heartache and helplessness; you can't make others love you if they won't.
Definitely, do what you can to get the love you need. But the practice here is about expressing love, distinct from receiving it. When you focus on the love you give rather than the love you get, then you're at cause rather than at effect; you're the cue ball, not the eight ball - which supports your sense of efficacy and confidence, as well as your mood. And it's enlightened self-interest: the best way to get love is to give it; even if it's still not returned, your love will likely improve the relationship, and help calm any troubled waters.
To some people acceptance or surrender has negative connotations, implying defeat, giving up and so forth, but I am talking about surrendering to the now...the present moment, unconditionally and without reservation.
"Non surrender hardens your psychological form, the shell of the ego, and so creates a strong sense of separateness. The world around you and people in particular come to be perceived as threatening. The unconscious compulsion to destroy others through judgment arises, as does the need to compete and dominate. Even nature becomes your enemy and your perceptions and interpretations are governed by fear. The mental disease we call paranoia is only a slightly more acute form of this NORMAL but dysfunctional state of consciousness. There is something within you that remains unaffected by the transient circumstances that make up your life situation, and only through surrender do you have access to it. It is your life, your very Being-which exists eternally in the timeless realm of the present."
Not at all, acceptance or 'surrender' is the simple but profound wisdom of yielding to rather than opposing the flow of life. Sometimes it it wiser to accept fully a situation than try to change it. Acceptance of what is immediately frees you from mind identification and connects you to Being...Resistance is the mind.
"Accept what comes to you woven in the pattern of your destiny, for what could more aptly fit your needs."
""I have decided to stick with love... Hate is too great a burden to bear."
Martin Luther King, Jr:
Hate, anger and resentment are heavy walls we erect, which destroy our peace of mind and limit our reach. Love has no such liabilities; it is empowering and liberating.
bodleing Forum Posts (13,810)
RE: SHOW TIME theme " what goes around" Buddy Blackwelders Memorial Photo Comp
Manchester city centre, Christmas.Must dash, got a plane to catch...
---- IMAGE REMOVED because photobucket.com no longer allows embedded images ----