WHEN TO GIVE UP LOOKING (207)
mnowsa: you don't really have to die trying though. For a change, you can simply go for one of those men who want you but you wouldn't want him otherwise
No man (other than Mr Darcy) Is worth dying over
Truthfully .My expectations are too high .The minute I start to like someone I look for flaws (like an escape plan) The more I want the less I get .When I dont want ,I dont get either .No win win for me eh .
So .Plan B ?! Give up for now .Work on my flirting skills and pick better choices
I still need more signals then an Indian though 
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mnowsa: And just to make things little easier for you, there is nothing called "right" man or "wrong" man. Nor is there any "right" woman or "wrong" woman. every person is right in his/her own merit.
I dont want a perfect man . Just a man who's perfect for me
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tainogirl: "...when do you say enough is enough? A week, a month, a year or two - a decade? ...
...What say you good folks."
...What say you good folks."
I am beginning to wonder this myself. I have gone back and forth with this very question for quite some time now. I sometimes wonder if it just is not meant to be. Maybe I get to be the crazy old cat lady that lives up the street in the creepy house with all the weeds! Woooo....scary.....LOL!
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dillydally: I dont want a perfect man . Just a man who's perfect for me
well, if he is "perfect" for you, please rest assured that you will start complaining about him for being just too "good" or "perfect" for you and then you will get bored of that man possibly as well. so accept a man as a "MAN" and then try to work on him. you may succeed or you may not in converting him in your version of man. But the bottom line is if you are not willing to worn on a so called 'imperfect' man, you will never get the chance of converting him into your "perfect" version of man. then again it is just my thought. If someone is already "perfect" for you, then it means you have nothing to work on and thereby making the whole relationship stagnate.
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mnowsa: well, if he is "perfect" for you, please rest assured that you will start complaining about him for being just too "good" or "perfect" for you and then you will get bored of that man possibly as well. so accept a man as a "MAN" and then try to work on him. you may succeed or you may not in converting him in your version of man. But the bottom line is if you are not willing to worn on a so called 'imperfect' man, you will never get the chance of converting him into your "perfect" version of man. then again it is just my thought. If someone is already "perfect" for you, then it means you have nothing to work on and thereby making the whole relationship stagnate.
So, please learn to accept and expect the differences between you and him as two different entities.
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mnowsa: well, if he is "perfect" for you, please rest assured that you will start complaining about him for being just too "good" or "perfect" for you and then you will get bored of that man possibly as well. so accept a man as a "MAN" and then try to work on him. you may succeed or you may not in converting him in your version of man. But the bottom line is if you are not willing to worn on a so called 'imperfect' man, you will never get the chance of converting him into your "perfect" version of man. then again it is just my thought. If someone is already "perfect" for you, then it means you have nothing to work on and thereby making the whole relationship stagnate.
.I do not want someone just to go changing them later .......... what would be the point ?!
Personally I could not date a person who is (can I say without sounding rude ?!) weak enough to be changed ,unless Its for a benefit - gambling and so forth .Im not into power play ,I dont want to be changed nor do I want to change anyone else . Flaws and all ,thats me .
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mnowsa: So, please learn to accept and expect the differences between you and him as two different entities.
Really ,I fail to understand what your point is ?!. Learn to except ?? ............ I already have and did so a few years back when I had my son .
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dillydally: .I do not want someone just to go changing them later .......... what would be the point ?!
Personally I could not date a person who is (can I say without sounding rude ?!) weak enough to be changed ,unless Its for a benefit - gambling and so forth .Im not into power play ,I dont want to be changed nor do I want to change anyone else . Flaws and all ,thats me .
Personally I could not date a person who is (can I say without sounding rude ?!) weak enough to be changed ,unless Its for a benefit - gambling and so forth .Im not into power play ,I dont want to be changed nor do I want to change anyone else . Flaws and all ,thats me .
well, with all due respect, i guess we are missing the true essence or the dynamics of human relationship. people change in time for better or worse regardless. And it would also mean that the person, who you are calling "perfect" for you today, can change entirely after a month or year, or who knows when, for better or worse. therefore it is not really realistic to expect for a relationship to move along the same way always.
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dillydally: Really ,I fail to understand what your point is ?!. Learn to except ?? ............ I already have and did so a few years back when I had my son .
ooops ............ accept would have made more sense
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mnowsa: well, with all due respect, i guess we are missing the true essence or the dynamics of human relationship. people change in time for better or worse regardless. And it would also mean that the person, who you are calling "perfect" for you today, can change entirely after a month or year, or who knows when, for better or worse. therefore it is not really realistic to expect for a relationship to move along the same way always.
but, to say this, i am not necessarily urging you to go for a man who is a gambler, drug-dealer, thief, robber or killer. i mean if you look around with an open mind and heart, you will find that most people are decent more or less. then again, it is just my thought...
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saseez: dont give up til either you dont want anybody or you got what you want
Good reply!
Why bother trying?
People who try too hard come over as desperate!
People should relax.
Love always comes when you least expect it anyway.
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mnowsa: well, with all due respect, i guess we are missing the true essence or the dynamics of human relationship. people change in time for better or worse regardless. And it would also mean that the person, who you are calling "perfect" for you today, can change entirely after a month or year, or who knows when, for better or worse. therefore it is not really realistic to expect for a relationship to move along the same way always.
True ,but isnt this the 'grow together' stage ? If you dont grow together you grow apart .Then its either end it or trod on .I wonder how many would choose the latter ?!
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dillydally: ooops ............ accept would have made more sense
Hiya Dilly!
Long time no see. What I see on this site more then anything else, is expectations that most persons can't live up too. Instead of having all these "requirements" how about just going with the flow and enjoy the moment or connection. Think we have a tendency to try too damned hard!!!!!!!!!------ This thread is Archived ------
woody636: Hiya Dilly! Long time no see. What I see on this site more then anything else, is expectations that most persons can't live up too. Instead of having all these "requirements" how about just going with the flow and enjoy the moment or connection. Think we have a tendency to try too damned hard!!!!!!!!!
agree with that
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avecaim: agree with that
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dillydally: True ,but isnt this the 'grow together' stage ? If you dont grow together you grow apart .Then its either end it or trod on .I wonder how many would choose the latter ?!
Absolutely..but do you really believe that "growing together" is always going to be smooth?
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mnowsa: Absolutely..but do you really believe that "growing together" is always going to be smooth?
heaven forbid
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dillydally: True ,but isnt this the 'grow together' stage ? If you dont grow together you grow apart .Then its either end it or trod on .I wonder how many would choose the latter ?!
The later is pointless and destructive. I had to get out for the sake of my sanity. The only constant is change and you either get lucky with it or you don't
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mnowsa: Absolutely..but do you really believe that "growing together" is always going to be smooth?
God no ...... but you cant .... ok ,shouldnt throw in the towel at the first hurdle .For instance if you like the girl ,you start chatting .You compliment her on certain attributes ........ 6 months down the line your both stable (?) why would you then try to change what you first fell for in the girl ?
Isnt that a bit backward ?!
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And just to make things little easier for you, there is nothing called "right" man or "wrong" man. Nor is there any "right" woman or "wrong" woman. every person is right in his/her own merit.