WHEN TO GIVE UP LOOKING (207)
dont give up til either you dont want anybody or you got what you want 
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saseez: dont give up til either you dont want anybody or you got what you want
I dont intend to ever give up till shes in my arms.
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tainogirl: Judging by the sheer number of threads from people frustrated with the dating game and tired of looking, when do you say enough is enough? A week, a month, a year or two - a decade? This continual search for the 'ONE', what happens if they never materialize? Many of us will probably find SOMEONE but for some of us the ONE may never come along. How do you deal with that? You can chase after it, get yourself all ready and say "Okay love I'm ready!" and discover that love's not ready for you - just yet. You can't hurry love.
And when we push it, before love is ready for us, because we are lonely we end up wasting time with someone in a relationship that is probably doomed to fail because you're together for all the wrong reasons. How many times have you seen people rush to the alter, even though something is telling them this is a mistake, they still do it because they don't want to be alone and without a partner?
How many gave up when they should have just pushed on a little further, how many kept pushing when they should have just relaxed and love would have found them? There is the delicate balance to being on this site, to know when to push and when to pull back. To know when to take a chance and leave the comfort zone and to know when not to take foolish chances. Dating sites like CS are a great tool but there are no guarantees. People get frustrated cause they want results, well if there are none - then its simply not time. And then when you least expect it -BAM! Love is what happens to you when you are busy doing other things. What say you good folks.
Oh Tain, what a lovely piece of writing. And when we push it, before love is ready for us, because we are lonely we end up wasting time with someone in a relationship that is probably doomed to fail because you're together for all the wrong reasons. How many times have you seen people rush to the alter, even though something is telling them this is a mistake, they still do it because they don't want to be alone and without a partner?
How many gave up when they should have just pushed on a little further, how many kept pushing when they should have just relaxed and love would have found them? There is the delicate balance to being on this site, to know when to push and when to pull back. To know when to take a chance and leave the comfort zone and to know when not to take foolish chances. Dating sites like CS are a great tool but there are no guarantees. People get frustrated cause they want results, well if there are none - then its simply not time. And then when you least expect it -BAM! Love is what happens to you when you are busy doing other things. What say you good folks.
I guess I was never really looking, although some may argue that, as I was here. But there were times when I screamed to myself 'Why can't a person contact me who will blow my skirt up?'
I always knew what I was able to offer in a relationship, which is alot, I can travel, I can handle long distance, even though it is hard, but it would never have been forever.
Was I ready for love? Yes, I was. In a big way, despite having a failed marriage, I had learned my lessons from that and knew I could love and be loved again.
I took a chance, a big one, whether it works out or not is only done to the two of us. I pushed because I wanted to, took a big risk and travelled many miles to be with someone. The being together, the sadness at parting and the phone calls never being enough for me, but something that I learnt to live with.
And also there is the attraction side, we can all pick and choose what we want from in a relationship, who doesn't want a person that can make our senses tingle and feel loved and treasured?
It's a risk, all of it is...
One that I feel is worth it.
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tainogirl: WHEN TO GIVE UP LOOKING?
When it not fun anymore.
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I have been lucky to find love three times in my life. All three happened when I least expected it or had given up looking. I don't think anyone should ever give up. You just need to relax and be yourself and love will happen. I also know that love can hit like an explosion and sometimes love comes softly and you must give it a chance to grow. I have experienced both. Good Luck to all those wanting to find Love.
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I am of the view that the search for love should not consume the bulk of one's time. Companionship is very important but only one of the many faucets in life such as family, career, religion, etc. All these areas should get a portion of one's time.
It is advisable that where suitable companionship is not readily identified one should utilize his/her time to improve the inner and outer person (man in the mirror), and try to self actualize on the other faucets towards contentment/happiness.
In other words, one's life should not be totally destroyed just because love is not found. Put yourself out there to find love but do not sit around putting your life and happiness on hold if its not found. Multi-task on all faucets simultaneously until all are actualized.
So in a nutshell, never give up on love or any of the faucets...but don't sit around waiting for them...there are so many other important things to do!
It is advisable that where suitable companionship is not readily identified one should utilize his/her time to improve the inner and outer person (man in the mirror), and try to self actualize on the other faucets towards contentment/happiness.
In other words, one's life should not be totally destroyed just because love is not found. Put yourself out there to find love but do not sit around putting your life and happiness on hold if its not found. Multi-task on all faucets simultaneously until all are actualized.
So in a nutshell, never give up on love or any of the faucets...but don't sit around waiting for them...there are so many other important things to do!
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Quit! Never...
Almost everything in life that is worth having is difficult to get. Dating is not for the fast runner, it is for the long distance jogger. You just need to know when to speed up and catch her. Or slow down and let her find you.
Almost everything in life that is worth having is difficult to get. Dating is not for the fast runner, it is for the long distance jogger. You just need to know when to speed up and catch her. Or slow down and let her find you.
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Hi Taino, A very good thread g/f. Not sure if I can truly say I am looking. As each day passes in this journey of my life I try to focus on the better part of each day. I have had the opportunity to meet some fantastic people on here. Will one os these gentleman end up willing to spend the rest of their life with me, only time will tell. I will not give up per say, as I truly believe we all are unique in some way and have something to offer that will attract another. 
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I have met a woman ..here on this site...some time ago...and fall in love... everything was great... until one day...she went to a baby shower.....................
and never came back
but i hav`nt give up....or should i ???
and never came back
but i hav`nt give up....or should i ???
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I will not even begin to start...I don't want a broken heart
I'll gladly wait for her to look for me...cause she'll accept me as I am and not as she wants me to be
I'll gladly wait for her to look for me...cause she'll accept me as I am and not as she wants me to be
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I stopped looking for a soulmate long ago, my soul is just fine and does not need a mate.
I stopped looking for my other half long ago, I am a whole person within myself and need no other half.
I stopped looking for someone to complete me long ago, I am complete..
Why cannot people just be happy with themselves?
I stopped looking for my other half long ago, I am a whole person within myself and need no other half.
I stopped looking for someone to complete me long ago, I am complete..
Why cannot people just be happy with themselves?
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cameraman: I will not even begin to start...I don't want a broken heart
I'll gladly wait for her to look for me...cause she'll accept me as I am and not as she wants me to be
I'll gladly wait for her to look for me...cause she'll accept me as I am and not as she wants me to be
My heart has been "broken" 9 times now.
I went to my Cardiologist and he fixed it..------ This thread is Archived ------
HJFinAZ: My heart has been "broken" 9 times now. I went to my Cardiologist and he fixed it..
If I ever get a broken heart...the Cardiologist wouldn't even know where to start ------ This thread is Archived ------
You know on my personal journey to the ONE, I have not yet met one man that did not teach me some important lesson even if the RELATIONSHIP did not work out. Each one had something to teach and for this I am eternally grateful. People sometimes forget that even the bad ones teach lessons you might need later. I hit pay dirt just a litte over three years ago in the worse relationship of my life so far. I hope never to encounter someone like that ever again - but oh the benefits in education I got about myself and men is totally priceless! But to illustrate my point that you never know how things will work out....even though it was an awful relationship we both walked away winners as far as I am concerned. We are both free to find the love we seek and we have a beautiful, bright, little girl who is the center of our world, who has more than made up for all the bad. Life can send you big, wonderful surprizes in little packages.
The glass is always half full.
The glass is always half full. ------ This thread is Archived ------
HJFinAZ: I stopped looking for a soulmate long ago, my soul is just fine and does not need a mate.
I stopped looking for my other half long ago, I am a whole person within myself and need no other half.
I stopped looking for someone to complete me long ago, I am complete..
Why cannot people just be happy with themselves?
I stopped looking for my other half long ago, I am a whole person within myself and need no other half.
I stopped looking for someone to complete me long ago, I am complete..
Why cannot people just be happy with themselves?
I guess my answer to that HJ is that we are all indivuals with different thoughts, beliefs, etc. Even though I also like myself and many times enjoy my alone time. But because I have only been alone 5 years out of my 60 I want that back in my life. Yes, I do spend time with others and always someone to do things with. But that is not what I am missing. I am missing that person who is with me in all aspects of my journey. Not that we have to be glued together at the hip, but knowing I will not be alone one more night would be a wonderful thing for me.
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has giving up
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tainogirl: You know on my personal journey to the ONE, I have not yet met one man that did not teach me some important lesson even if the RELATIONSHIP did not work out. Each one had something to teach and for this I am eternally grateful. People sometimes forget that even the bad ones teach lessons you might need later. I hit pay dirt just a litte over three years ago in the worse relationship of my life so far. I hope never to encounter someone like that ever again - but oh the benefits in education I got about myself and men is totally priceless! But to illustrate my point that you never know how things will work out....even though it was an awful relationship we both walked away winners as far as I am concerned. We are both free to find the love we seek and we have a beautiful, bright, little girl who is the center of our world, who has more than made up for all the bad. Life can send you big, wonderful surprizes in little packages. The glass is always half full.
Now folks, here is one smart lady...
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I learn a lot about myself from the women I know and have known..
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HJFinAZ: Now folks, here is one smart lady...
Great post isn't it, Pat? Tain? That is wonderful.
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And when we push it, before love is ready for us, because we are lonely we end up wasting time with someone in a relationship that is probably doomed to fail because you're together for all the wrong reasons. How many times have you seen people rush to the alter, even though something is telling them this is a mistake, they still do it because they don't want to be alone and without a partner?
How many gave up when they should have just pushed on a little further, how many kept pushing when they should have just relaxed and love would have found them? There is the delicate balance to being on this site, to know when to push and when to pull back. To know when to take a chance and leave the comfort zone and to know when not to take foolish chances. Dating sites like CS are a great tool but there are no guarantees. People get frustrated cause they want results, well if there are none - then its simply not time. And then when you least expect it -BAM! Love is what happens to you when you are busy doing other things.