Pregnant (75)
morgan5chelmsford, Essex, England UK87 Threads 8,237 Postsrohaan: It is natural for a woman to want a child/ren, and she does not have a super long time to make up her mind, as men do. (Tony Randall fathered a child at the age of 71). Given this fact, men do need to be more understanding about women wanting to fulfill the wonderful nature exclusive to them. If a man really, really does not want children, ever, it is equally wrong to force him to be a father by deliberately getting pregnant against his wishes, so the final analysis is they should split the sheets while still young so she can find a more appropriate mate. Would you really want to live with someone who harbored resentment? It's tough. The ideal situation would be for the man to soften his stance on the issue, but if he just can't, then dissolve the relationship. (not everyone is born with the capacity to raise children. Fair enough?)
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tainogirl: If a man definitely does not want kids but the woman he is with wants them and despite his wishes she goes ahead and gets pregnant anyway, who should bear the financial cost of raising the child? Guys what would you do in a situation like this?
.... run away .... change my name ....
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rohaan: OK OK, but let's not boil the kettle dry. You know the gist of what I was trying to say. The old French saying about your kibbling is "Il couve les cheveaux en quatre". (he not only splits hairs, he cuts them into fourths!)
Sorry rohaan, I need to tell you the correct French line is
"Il coupe les cheveux en quatre".
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gabrielle95: Sorry rohaan, I need to tell you the correct French line is
"Il coupe les cheveux en quatre".
I know. it was a typo. mea culpa! (did I get that one right? merci"Il coupe les cheveux en quatre".
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tainogirl: If a man definitely does not want kids but the woman he is with wants them and despite his wishes she goes ahead and gets pregnant anyway, who should bear the financial cost of raising the child? Guys what would you do in a situation like this?
That would be a real low down trick on the womans part so she should.
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tainogirl: Having a relationship with a child you fathered in one thing but being DELIBERATELY lied to does bring up an issue of trust, not the best start for a kid, a possibly resentful father and an untrustworthy mother.
Exactly my point ...my wife had two childern by another man while we were married...I raised those kids as my own ...did not know they were not mine till the youngest was 4 years old ...no way could I turn my back on those kids who thought I was thier father....however I do not agree with the state law that says just because I was married to this woman I should have to pay child support to her for childern I did not father ...wheather or not I raise them ...I refused to pay for my ex-wives discretions...but of course the courts seen otherwise...
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Its true thats a nasty trick!! But sometimes life gives us the biggest blessings in unexpected ways. As far as financial responsibilty goes, I would let the courts decide.
However, theres a bigger picture here. No-one should turn thier backs on raising a child ever! For any reason. I truly hope this little person doesnt grow up with the stigma "unwanted child".
However, theres a bigger picture here. No-one should turn thier backs on raising a child ever! For any reason. I truly hope this little person doesnt grow up with the stigma "unwanted child".
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davpk10: Exactly my point ...my wife had two childern by another man while we were married...I raised those kids as my own ...did not know they were not mine till the youngest was 4 years old ...no way could I turn my back on those kids who thought I was thier father....however I do not agree with the state law that says just because I was married to this woman I should have to pay child support to her for childern I did not father ...wheather or not I raise them ...I refused to pay for my ex-wives discretions...but of course the courts seen otherwise...
Thats gotta be the worst thing anyone can do to anyone, and it makes me ashamed to be a woman when I hear of stories like that.
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davpk10: Exactly my point ...my wife had two childern by another man while we were married...I raised those kids as my own ...did not know they were not mine till the youngest was 4 years old ...no way could I turn my back on those kids who thought I was thier father....however I do not agree with the state law that says just because I was married to this woman I should have to pay child support to her for childern I did not father ...wheather or not I raise them ...I refused to pay for my ex-wives discretions...but of course the courts seen otherwise...
To make a mistake once is one thing but to make it TWICE is a habit. It takes a big man to not blame the kids and still stick by them. That's equally as painful as a woman finding out her husband has some outside child that she's expected to accomodate. When you break a trust like that the relatioship has nowhere to go but down.
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tainogirl: To make a mistake once is one thing but to make it TWICE is a habit. It takes a big man to not blame the kids and still stick by them. That's equally as painful as a woman finding out her husband has some outside child that she's expected to accomodate. When you break a trust like that the relatioship has nowhere to go but down.
Well some of you may remember me becoming a Grandfather for the first time a while back...that was the child of the four year old ...she is my daughter in every sense of the word other than biologically....she is now 26 years old...and still e-mails me and calls .....things are never black and white ...there is always huge grey areas in everything concerning life...
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davpk10: Well some of you may remember me becoming a Grandfather for the first time a while back...that was the child of the four year old ...she is my daughter in every sense of the word other than biologically....she is now 26 years old...and still e-mails me and calls .....things are never black and white ...there is always huge grey areas in everything concerning life...
That certainly is a happy ending I would think.
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life is always stranger that fiction.....some famous person said that but I cannot remember who ....
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Don't you think if a woman is that deceitful a man would know. And I have always been told if you do not want to become pregnant then it is your responsibility to make sure you do not. And I am going to make sure mine is harder to get into than Fort Knox------ This thread is Archived ------
davpk10: Well some of you may remember me becoming a Grandfather for the first time a while back...that was the child of the four year old ...she is my daughter in every sense of the word other than biologically....she is now 26 years old...and still e-mails me and calls .....things are never black and white ...there is always huge grey areas in everything concerning life...
Thats so true D, Every child needs parents regardless of where they may come from.
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Rohaan you described what happened to me.Lots of arguments and differences of opinion as i felt trapted to get married to my ex, the first couple of years,and deep inside me i want it out. She sensed it and wanted a child,i said no,no,no, not now later,am stoping taking contraceptives she said,both we must decide,wanted the child,i said.-When the child was 3.1/2 years old we got a divorced.-I supported and see the child, till 13 years old,when my son,decided to stay with me,and ever since,is with me,now a grown up man.- From my own exsperience i will say this in the thread... Blackmai pregnancy,in most cases,does not keep two people together.
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Proudamerican100: Don't you think if a woman is that deceitful a man would know. And I have always been told if you do not want to become pregnant then it is your responsibility to make sure you do not. And I am going to make sure mine is harder to get into than Fort Knox
How? How would he know?
If the dates fit roughly, and the child is not of another color or ethnic group - how would he know?
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Proudamerican100: Don't you think if a woman is that deceitful a man would know. And I have always been told if you do not want to become pregnant then it is your responsibility to make sure you do not. And I am going to make sure mine is harder to get into than Fort Knox
so are you calling me a liar or just an idiot.....
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taino where do you come up with this stuff?
the states i have lived in
ny
calif
az
all required genetic testing prior to deciding whether or not child support was to be ordered, and the burden of proof was on the petitioner
the states i have lived in
ny
calif
az
all required genetic testing prior to deciding whether or not child support was to be ordered, and the burden of proof was on the petitioner
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omy nevermind 
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mindfful: taino where do you come up with this stuff? the states i have lived in
ny
calif
az
all required genetic testing prior to deciding whether or not child support was to be ordered, and the burden of proof was on the petitioner
yup thats why I did not have to pay the child support as New York State did not recognise the decision that the courts made in GA.......ny
calif
az
all required genetic testing prior to deciding whether or not child support was to be ordered, and the burden of proof was on the petitioner
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